Adam's Sound Blogic

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2011

2012-01-29T19:34:00.000-05:00

So we come to the end of our journey with a look back at last year's show. The 2011 edition of the Rumble once again tried to change the formula - this time by having 40 entrants in the match. As you'll see, this was not a case where the motto 'bigger is better' is true. I hope you've appreciated this look back at the Rumble match and will enjoy the 2012 edition tonight. As is typically the case, there should be a number of surprises and hopefully a winner we can all support. One thing's for sure, tonight will properly get us onto the 'Road to Wrestlemania'.

2011 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the TD Garden in Boston, MA

Last year’s Rumble MVP, C.M Punk gets the unfortunate luck of drawing #1. At this point, he was the leader of the (new) Nexus. Before #2 comes out, the entire group of the Corre (dumbest stable name ever) come out and surround Punk. They attack him, prompting the rest of the Nexus to run out and even the odds. As they brawl, the anonymous RAW GM sends an email ordering their fight to stop. He sends everyone but Punk to the back or else face removal from the match. Frankly I hope they stay so we don’t have to see them again later in an official capacity. As the crowd chants for Punk, the official #2 entrant, Daniel Bryan makes his way out to the ring. The two have some nice fast-paced back and forth action to start. Bryan connects with a missile dropkick but then misses a charge in the corner. #3 is the first Corre member, Justin Gabriel. Punk and Bryan clothesline each other which allows Gabriel to attempt the 450 splash. Punk moves out of the way and Bryan is able to throw the beaten Gabriel out of the ring. Zack Ryder is #4 and he goes right after Bryan. These three guys would be in much higher positions in the company by year’s end. Ryder charges at Bryan who is able to move and hiptoss him out of the ring. And we go from rising star to cagey veteran as William Regal comes out at #5. He lays some stiff shots in on both Bryan and Punk. Now Bryan lays out Punk and Regal with kicks. Ted Dibiase is the #6 entrant and he goes after Bryan. As Dibiase tries to get rid of Punk, Bryan brutalizes Regal with a series of kicks. #7 is John Morrison and he takes out everyone including delivering a C4 to Bryan. Dibiase manages to get Morrison on the apron. Regal then bumps him off, but Morrison manages to hop onto the guardrail without touching the floor. Morrison then walks the rail and hops back onto the ring steps and reenters the ring. That was pretty sweet. Meanwhile, as we were fixated on him, Regal was eliminated by Dibiase. We’ve paired off now with Dibiase and Morrison fighting and Bryan trying to eliminate Punk. Someone who’s thankful that the Rumble has 40 guys this year is Yoshi Tatsu, who’s out at #8. Nothing of note happens as our second Nexus member, Husky Harris is the #9 entrant. He comes in and plays bodyguard for his leader, Punk. #10 is Chavo Guerrero who continues to sponge off Eddie’s name by giving Dibiase the Three Amigos. That gets interrupted by Punk, so Chavo gives it to him instead. However, he gets interrupted again by Morrison, so Chavo tries it on him. One more interruption by Bryan ends with Chavo completing the move on Bryan. Chavo gets a nice pop for that.

We might get some ring clearing now because Mark Henry enters at #11. Chavo tries to hit him with a high crossbody, but Henry catches him and pitches him to the floor. Tatsu tries to attack Henry, so Henry retaliates by clotheslining him out of the ring. Henry finally gets stopped by a double attack from Punk and Harris. #12 is JTG and he always seems to luck out and get a spot in this match. This match is in need of some star power, however we don’t get it because another Nexus member, Michael McGuillicutty is #13. He does make an impact, however, by quickly eliminating JTG. He and Harris team up and are also able to eliminate Dibiase. The string of Superstars mainstays continues as Chris Masters enters at #14. He gets Punk in the Masterlock and nearly eliminates him before Nexus makes the save. It’s more Nexus members as David Otunga is the #15 entrant. He joins his Nexus brethren in eliminating Bryan, Masters, Morrison, and Henry. Only Nexus members remain in the ring as Tyler Reks (who?) comes out at #16. He doesn’t have the chance of getting one offensive move in before the Nexus eliminate him as well. Vladimir Koslov is the #17 entrant and he receives the same treatment. They eliminate him and pose as they wait for their next victim. We could use for Punk to get on the mic during these breaks. #18 is R-Truth, who runs to the ring seemingly undeterred by the fact that there’s a gang waiting for him. Punk mocks his ‘What’s Up’ catchphrase and then throws him out. Crowd is quickly growing restless with this. The Great Khali waddles out at #19 and I doubt, despite his size, that he’ll make much of a difference. I stand corrected though because he manages to take them down and eliminate Harris. However, just as we think that this will be the end of their dominance, the final Nexus member, Mason Ryan enters at #20. He attacks Khali and manages to throw him out, leaving us once again with only Nexus members in the ring.

In our first surprise of the night, the six time WCW champion, Booker T enters at #21. Big crowd pop for him. He initially holds his own and takes down the Nexus members long enough to perform the Spinarooni. He gets close to eliminating Punk, but Ryan comes up behind him and throws out Booker instead. #22 is John Cena and I think we can safely say the reign of Nexus will finally be coming to an end. He’s able to divide and conquer and eliminates Ryan, Otunga, and McGuillicutty and short order. Cena and Punk square off in a match up that would get much more interesting a few months later. Cena escapes a GTS attempt and both men clothesline each other. With both men down, Hornswoggle comes out at #23. He taunts Punk, who shoves him down. Good!! Punk gets Cena up again, but Cena escapes and manages to pitch out Punk. Not pleased about that one. Cena then helps Hornswoggle up. If Cena wanted to earn some favor with the crowd he’d launch him into the 8th row, but he instead opts to form an alliance with him. Tyson Kidd comes out at #24 and gets double-teamed by the two of them, which includes an FU by Hornswoggle. He gets eliminated shortly after that. The second Corre member to enter, Heath Slater is #25. He receives a 5 knuckle shuffle from both of them and then gets hit with the tadpole splash by Hornswoggle. Cena quickly pitches him after that. The only saving grace about this sequence is that they’re jobbing out worthless talent. Kofi Kingston is #26 and we’ll see what happens now that it’s another face in there. He actually locks up with Cena as Hornswoggle stands by and watches. That goes nowhere as Jack Swagger enters at #27. He takes down both Cena and Kingston. Hornswoggle shoves Swagger, which is enough of a distraction to allow Kingston to hit him with a high crossbody. Now Kingston and Hornswoggle hit Swagger with the Boom Drop. Sheamus runs out at #28 and I hope he destroys that horrible little nasty stereotype that’s in the ring. He comes in and attacks everyone else. When he spots Hornswoggle he shoves him down. Hornswoggle gets back up and tunes up the band. He hits Sweet Shin Music, but Sheamus quickly recovers and picks him up. He sets him on the top rope and then hits him with the Brogue Kick to punt him out of the match. Thank goodness. We get back to normalcy as Rey Mysterio enters at #29. He slides into the ring and is immediately caught by Swagger. As he tries to hit Swagger with a 619, Sheamus intercepts him with a clothesline. Swagger charges at Mysterio in the corner, but Mysterio heaves him onto the apron. As Swagger tries to reenter, Mysterio hits him with a 619 that knocks him to the floor. With everyone down, the next Corre member, Wade Barrett comes out at #30.

Kingston stomps away at Barrett in the corner as Dolph Ziggler makes history by being the first ever #31 entrant into the Rumble. It should also be noted that Ziggler already wrestled and lost to the World Champion, Edge earlier tonight. Cena, Kingston, and Mysterio team up to try and eliminate Barrett, but they’re unsuccessful. In yet another surprise entrant, #32 is Big Daddy Cool Diesel, who gets an even bigger pop than Booker. Barrett goes right after him but gets knocked down. Diesel catches Kingston and hits him with Snake Eyes. He even knocks down Cena with a clothesline. Drew McIntyre is the #33 entrant and he quickly teams up with Sheamus to take on Diesel. A ‘Let’s Go Diesel’ chant breaks out. Mysterio hits Diesel with the 619, which draws boos. The Miz’s protégé, Alex Riley enters at #34. He runs in and immediately gets punched by Cena. Meanwhile Barrett manages to dump out Diesel, which the crowd does not like. As the action continues, the Miz joins the commentary team. #35 is Big Show who has a brief staredown with Diesel in the aisle before entering the match. He knocks down everyone who comes in his path. Show grabs Ziggler and heaves him out of the ring. Cena and Kingston work together and manage to eliminate Riley, something that the commentary team, including Miz, completely miss. The final Corre member, Ezekiel Jackson is the #36 entrant. As he runs down Show manages to throw out McIntyre. Jackson clips Show in the leg and then heaves him out of the ring. Miz says that Riley is being very smart right now, apparently oblivious to the fact that was eliminated minutes ago. Santino Marella runs out at #37 and goes after Sheamus. Sheamus recovers and hits Santino with a Brogue Kick. That shot causes Santino to be knocked out of the ring, but under the bottom rope. Driving out to the ring in a Bentley is Alberto Del Rio at #38. As he postures in the aisle, Matt Stryker finally figures out that Riley was eliminated. Del Rio still hasn’t made it to the ring yet when Randy Orton runs out at #39. Orton also lost a world title match earlier tonight. He clotheslines Del Rio from behind and then sends him into the steps. He brings Del Rio into the ring and gives him the RKO. He then gives one to Sheamus and Kingston as well. He eliminates both Sheamus and Kingston after that. Orton and Cena have a staredown which draws zero response from the crowd. I absolutely love that their staredown was met with such apathy. They wanted to have an iconic moment in the same way whenever Austin/Rock, Michaels/Jannetty, or Santana/Martel met in the ring and yet nothing. Rounding out the field is Kane at #40. He comes in and punches everyone in his way.

Jackson charges at him, but Kane ducks and causes him to fall out of the ring. Kane catches Mysterio coming off the top rope. Before he can chokeslam him, Mysterio reverses it into a ‘rana that eliminates Kane. While still on the apron, Mysterio gets knocked to the floor by Barrett. We’re seemingly down to the final four of Cena, Orton, Del Rio and Barrett. From my perspective that’s a weak quartet, although the brain trust that run this company would disagree. Cena and Orton staredown again and it’s one again met with silence. To quote Nelson Muntz, ‘haw haw’. Despite being down to these last few guys, we’re still getting some pretty generic fighting between them. Suddenly Alex Riley runs back down and distracts Cena. That allows Miz to run into the ring and throw Cena out. I have to imagine that was not how that was originally supposed to play out. Riley likely got eliminated earlier than he was supposed to and that was the audible. Now Del Rio and Barrett team up against Orton. Orton recovers long enough to toss out Barrett, however, Del Rio quickly runs up behind him and throws out Orton.Del Rio begins to celebrate his victory, but suddenly Santino Marella, who had never been eliminated, reemerges. Del Rio turns around and gets hit with the Cobra. The crowd is loving this. Santino goes to throw Del Rio, but Del Rio reverses course midstream and pitches out Santino instead. Now Del Rio can officially celebrate his win.

Bottom Line: They added 10 more guys to this match and yet the roster still seemed weaker than in other recent years. We really did not need nearly a tenth of the roster to be comprised of Nexus and Corre members. Their presence also created the major sag in the middle of the match where either they or the Cena/Hornswoggle duo were dominating. On the plus side, there were a couple nice surprises and it also attempted to set up some Wrestlemania feuds. While I give them credit for trying to promote a new star in Del Rio, I think hindsight may prove that they made the wrong call by giving him the win. In fact, I think I would have rather had Santino win here, only to have him lose the title shot sometime before Wrestlemania. It would have given the match a feel-good ending and could have actually built Del Rio’s heel heat further by having him win the title shot in a more nefarious manner later down the line. This was not a strong Rumble and time (albeit only a year) has not been kind to it. ** ¾

NMR: Real Steel

2012-01-29T19:27:00.000-05:00

When there are actual movies being developed on board games like Battleship, you wonder why this film was not called by its inspiration - Rock'em Sock'em robots. In Real Steel, Hugh Jackman plays a washed up boxer who now spends his career fighting robots remotely. Early on in the film he learns he has a son who he must now watch after the boy's mother passes away. Soon the two bond over the constructing and training of a robot named Atom, who may or may not possess skills beyond most robots. If all of this sounds corny and familiar, you're right. The film liberally borrows plot devices and themes from films like Rocky, The Champ, Over the Top and, Transformers. It would be easy to criticize such lazy storytelling, but the problem is that the ideas they use are crowd-pleasers and they work here as well. You can't help but get invested in seeing them form a bond and watch the robot be victorious. And I will definitely give the film credit for visually making the robot fights look very impressive. The biggest drawback of the film is its runtime and usage of that time. There's no reason why this film should have been over two hours long. Subplots involving the boy teaching the robot to dance and a loan shark chasing after Jackman's character seem superfluous and could have easily been edited out of the film. In fact, the time spent on those scenes should have been used to more firmly establish the film's villain. Both the champion robot and its handlers are not developed enough to make us root that hard against them. The finish to the final battle in the film certainly leaves the door wide open for a sequel, so I hope when they make the next film, they correct some of these issues and perhaps delve into more of the science fiction aspects of the story that were only loosely covered in this first outing. This is no cinematic classic, but it uses a tried-and-true formula effectively to make it entertaining. The cast gives good performances (with the exception of the kid who's brash attitude can be grating at times) and the robot battles are a lot of fun. If the subject matter interests you at all, this is definitely worth a rental. Rating: *** 1/2

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2010

2012-01-28T01:27:00.000-05:00

As we get closer to the end, we look back at the 2010 Rumble which featured another surprising return who managed to come back and win it all

2010 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Phillips Arena in Atlanta, GA

#1 is Dolph Ziggler, who’s theme song claims he is perfection. He’ll need to be if he’s to win this match. He’ll begin this match against Evan Bourne, who is #2. Bourne uses his speed to gain an early advantage. A standing dropkick by Ziggler nearly sends Bourne out. A sloppy ‘rana by Bourne puts Ziggler on the apron. Ziggler hits the Zig Zag, but Bourne recovers and connects with Air Bourne. Out to save us all is C.M. Punk at #3. Punk makes quick work of both guys, sending them out and to the floor. He then asks Serena to get him a mic. Punk says those two were just the first of 27 others who will be saved tonight. #4 is JTG, who must have once again won the coin toss. He foolishly tries for a 10-punch count on Punk who dumps him to the floor. And now we get more sermonizing. He claims he’ll be the first straight-edged Rumble winner. To do so, he’ll have to go through The Great Khali, who is #5. Punk tells Khali he can make him greater. He asks Khali to raise his hand and make a pledge. Khali chops him instead. As Khali applies the head vice, the second woman ever to enter the Rumble, Beth Phoenix, is the #6 entrant. Khali picks her up and places her on the apron. Beth grabs Khali and lays a big kiss on him that sends him over the top rope and to the floor. Beth now goes after Punk and attempts to eliminate him. He escapes and hits her with the GTS. As Zack Ryder comes out at #7, Punk easily dumps out Beth. Punk asks Ryder if he’d like to join the Straight Edge Society and then nails him with the microphone. It doesn’t take too much more after that to eliminate him as well. A ‘C.M. Punk’ chant begins. He has been ruling the Rumble thus far. Punk says he is better than whoever will come out next. #8 is Triple H and yet somehow I don’t think that Punk will recant his statement. HHH comes in and takes it right to Punk. As HHH connects with a spinebuster, Drew McIntyre enters at #9. He takes his time coming to the ring. HHH meets him when he does get in the ring and hits him with a running knee. Punk attempts the GTS on HHH, but he blocks it and throws him out. That is very disappointing. #10 is Ted Dibiase and he goes after HHH. Dibiase and McIntrye begin to team up to work over HHH. Matt Striker is already beginning to grate on me with his moronic rhetoric questions that he tries so hard to make profound.

John Morrison enters at #11 and he attacks both Dibiase and McIntyre. Hard to believe this is the first time tonight that we’ve as many as four guys in the match. Morrison connects (sort of) with Starship Pain on McIntyre, but then gets clotheslined by HHH. #12 is Kane and he enters with a flying clothesline on HHH. He takes down everyone in the ring but has yet to eliminate anyone yet. He chokeslams HHH as Cody Rhodes comes out at #13. He saves his partner Dibiase who was nearly eliminated thanks to Kane. Rhodes sends Morrison to the apron, but he hangs on. Morrison reenters the ring by springing off the top rope, but Rhodes hits him with a dropkick in midair. MVP is #14, but before he can make it to the ring, The Miz runs out and nails him with the U.S. title. Legacy work on eliminating HHH while Morrison hits a spin kick on McIntyre. Carlito enters at #15 and I had honestly forgotten he was still employed with the company at this point. He begins to hit the Backstabber on several of the guys in the ring. And after briefly appearing a moment ago, The Miz officially enters at #16. Suddenly MVP runs out from the back and goes after The Miz. He tackles Miz causing both of them to fall out and be eliminated. #17 is Fat…er…I mean, Matt Hardy. He earns Bushwacker status by entering the match and going to the top rope only to be shoved out by Kane. However, HHH comes up behind Kane and throws him out as well. Now HHH hits everyone left in the ring with a spinebuster. HHH attempts to Pedigree Rhodes, but McIntyre clips him from behind. Shawn Michaels is the #18 entrant and he enters the match on a mission. He desperately wants to fight The Undertaker at Wrestlemania and can do so by winning this match. He makes an immediate impact by backdropping Carlito out of the ring. He then pitches out both Rhodes and Dibiase. He avoids a Morrison kick and throws him out as well. Michaels and HHH team up and eliminate McIntyre. We’re down to HHH and Michaels, but before they can fight, John Cena enters at #19. He goes after both members of DX. He hits the five knuckle shuffle on both of them, which draws boos from the crowd. Cena tries to eliminate Michaels, but HHH makes the save. HHH hits the Pedigree on Cena. When he stands up Michaels hits him with Sweet Chin Music, which knocks him out of the ring. Big shocker there! There truly are no friends in this match. As we still recover from seeing that, Shelton Benjamin comes out at #20. Why do I have the feeling he’s once again going to be a victim of Michaels. Benjamin actually manages to hit Michaels with a few moves. However, when he goes for his finisher on Cena, it’s Cena who actually dumps him out of the ring. I guess Michaels got bored eliminating him year after year.

#21 is Yoshi Tatsu and somehow I don’t think he’s going to be able to hold his own against Cena and Michaels. He gets some token offense in, but soon Cena clotheslines him out of the ring. We’re back to Cena and Michaels. The Big Show is the #22 entrant and he’ll likely have better success than Tatsu. Show grabs Michaels and puts him on the apron, but Michaels begins to pull Show out with him. Neither is eliminated. Cena attempts to throw Michaels out, but he skins the cat to come back in. Hey Kool Aid! Oh nevermind, it’s just Mark Henry out at #23. He gets in Show’s face and they begin to slug it out. After Cena joins the attack, Henry is able to slam the Big Show. Cena gets Henry up for the FU, but his weight causes Cena to buckle. #24 is Chris Masters and nobody cares. Why couldn’t he have been quick fodder for Punk earlier in the match? Masters whips Michaels, who does his flip flop and fly sell. However, Show quickly grabs him and throws him out. As Henry tries to eliminate the Big Show, R-Truth runs out at #25. He comes up behind both Show and Henry and dumps them both to the floor. What did he do to deserve that push?? Now he manages to hit a scissors kick on Cena. It’s the All-American America Jack Swagger out at #26. He goes after everyone in the ring. Swagger clotheslines Michaels out, but once again Shawn finds a way to hang on. #27 is Kofi Kingston and he enters by hitting a high crossbody on Swagger. As Swagger tries to eliminate Kingston, Kofi reverses it into a ‘rana that sends Swagger to the floor instead. Kingston hits a 10-punch count on R-Truth. Truth then dumps Kingston to the apron. Kingston, however, uses a legscissors to pull Truth out of the ring and send him to the floor. Chris Jericho comes out at #28 and goes after Cena. Good. Cena recovers and hits him with the FU. Michaels then hits Jericho with the flying elbow. Michaels tunes up the band, but Kingston hits him with Trouble in Paradise instead. Cena then grabs Kingston and pitches him out of the ring. Cena turns around and Jericho hits him with the Codebreaker. And in a big surprise, it’s Edge at #29. He has been out with an injury since last May. He immediately attacks Jericho, who’s badmouthed him since he’s been gone. Edge hits spears on Jericho, Michaels and Cena. Edge then throws out Jericho. #30 is Batista, who automatically becomes part of the Final Four along with Edge, Michaels, and Cena. Man, I could easily see any one of these guys winning it. Batista comes in and takes down everyone. Batista foolishly takes time to taunt, which allows Edge to spear him. Now it’s Michaels who begins to get his second wind. He hits flying elbows on both Cena and Batista. He then hits Sweet Chin Music on both of them. Edge clotheslines Michaels and they both fall over the top rope and onto the apron. Michaels kicks Edge back into the ring, but then Batista knocks Michaels off the apron to eliminate him. Michaels is absolutely heartbroken, no pun intended. He begins to flip out knowing he lost his chance to face The Undertaker. He throws a referee down and then superkicks another one before leaving despondent. Meanwhile things continue in the ring as Batista attempts the Batista Bomb on Cena. Cena blocks it and backdrops him. Batista charges at Cena, who pulls the top rope down causing Batista to fall out. Edge goes for a spear on Cena, but he avoids it. However, when he makes a charge, Edge sidesteps him and pitches him out for the victory.

Bottom Line: This was almost the opposite of last year’s Rumble as they kept things very streamlined. There were hardly any slow spots or periods with too many guys in there. You also had a lot of fun or entertaining moments like Punk’s sermonizing, Michaels coming up short in his quest to win and Edge’s surprise return. However, there were also a number of small aspects that could have made this match even better. I felt like there were some missed opportunities to set up the eventual Wrestlemania matches better. Since Batista would face Cena, I would have liked for Batista to be more instrumental in causing Cena to be eliminated. I also would have liked more interaction between Edge and Jericho for the same reason. Still these are minor quibbles in an otherwise strong Rumble. **** ¼

Bowling for Votes deleted scenes

2012-01-28T01:22:00.000-05:00

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2009

2012-01-27T01:00:00.000-05:00

While the winner of the '08 Rumble had been a huge surprise that no one saw coming, one year later the winner of the Rumble was painfully obvious. Lacking that surprise really puts a damper on this match as it heads towards its inevitable conclusion.

2009 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Joe Louis Arena in Detroit, MI

The man who holds the longevity record, Rey Mysterio, gets a chance to best his own time as he’s this year’s #1 entrant. Let’s hope this year he doesn’t spend the entire match lying on the ground. He’ll begin by squaring off against #2 John Morrison. Rey goes for a bulldog, but Morrison blocks it and nearly throws Mysterio out in the process. Mysterio reenters and tosses Morrison over. He dangles from the top rope, but does not hit the ground. # 3 is Carlito and he goes after both guys. Carlito gets tossed onto the apron, but he hangs on. He comes back in with a springboard moonsault on Morrison. Some impressive near eliminations thus far. MVP is out at #4 and gets a nice chant from the crowd despite being in the midst of a losing streak at this time. He attempts the Ballin’ elbow on Morrison, but Mysterio blocks it. MVP hits Mysterio with a suplex and then completes the elbow drop. The string of athletic competitors comes to a halt as The Great Khali comes out at #5. Everybody goes after him, but he knocks everyone down. Khali is the only guy standing, but nobody has been eliminated yet. Our world tour continues with the big Russia, Vladimir Koslov out at #6. He goes after Khali and manages to single-handledly eliminate him with a clothesline. MVP attempts to hit Koslov with a running kick, but he avoids it. Koslov then dumps MVP out. Carlito tries his luck, but Koslov catches him with a spinebuster. He throws him out shortly thereafter. Before he can do anymore damage, Triple H enters at #7. The two of them tangle and after Koslov gets hit with a facebuster, HHH is able to throw him out of the ring. #8 is Randy Orton who enters the match surrounded in controversy after punting Vince McMahon in the head the past week on RAW. He comes in and goes right after HHH. Orton attempts the RKO, but HHH blocks it. As he tries for the Pedigree, Morrison comes over and hits him with a kick. Then Mysterio nails Orton with a plancha. He follows that up with a 619 on Morrison. Both members of Cryme Time come out at #9 and they flip a coin to decide who will actually get to enter. JTG wins the flip and Shad learns after the fact that it was a two-headed coin. Cute. Meanwhile no one is close to being eliminated at the moment. #10 is Ted Dibiase (Jr.) who was part of Orton’s Legacy group at the time. Dibiase throws both JTG and Morrison over the top rope, but both hang on. As they hang on the top rope, they both begin to kick and fight each other, however neither is successful in knocking the other guy down. Meanwhile, Mysterio sends Dibiase over the top rope and nearly eliminates him. Credit to everyone thus far for some daredevil moves to avoid elimination.

Things just got a whole lot more interesting with Mr. Serious Chris Jericho out at #11. He goes after HHH which is a strategy I wouldn’t recommend if you want to stay in the match. Jericho blocks a Pedigree attempt and then tries to put on the Walls of Jericho, but HHH powers out of that. HHH throws Jericho over and he has a near elimination of his own. #12 is Mike Knox who immediately goes after Mysterio. While most guys are fighting, Orton and Dibiase gather in a corner to strategize. Morrison’s tag partner, The Miz enters at #13. He manages to get a shot in on everyone. Orton hits RKOs on Morrison, Miz, and JTG. His onslaught is stopped by HHH, who hits him with a Pedigree. HHH grabs Morrison and whips him into the Miz, causing both guys to fall over the top rope and to the ground. Mysterio gets thrown out, but he walks on the backs of Morrison and Miz to avoid touching the ground and reenter the ring. Man, another innovative spot. Finlay is the #14 entrant and fights everyone that comes near him. He comes close to eliminating Dibiase, but Orton makes the save. And now Orton’s group gets stronger as the other Legacy member, Cody Rhodes enters at #15. The three of them gang up and attack the rest of the entrants in the ring. Mysterio tries a springboard move on Orton, but Orton catches him with an RKO. Man, if Mysterio had been this active and innovative in ’06, I would not have minded him getting the longevity record. #16 is GONG!, The Undertaker. Everybody backs up bracing for him to enter the ring. He strikes everyone in sight and then throws out JTG. He hits Rhodes with Snake Eyes and a big boot. Speaking of Rhodes, his older brother, Dustin, aka Goldust comes out at #17. The two brothers have a staredown before Goldust knocks him down with a right hand. He backdrops Cody over the top rope, but he manages to hang on. Orton helps his friend by giving Goldust an RKO. He then orders Rhodes to throw out Goldust, which he does. #18 is C.M. Punk and he everyone with kicks and knees. HHH attempts to hit him with a Pedigree, but Punk escapes and connects with the GTS on him. Wow! Punk should savor that moment. Mark Henry is the #19 entrant. Way too many guys in there right now with no one close to being eliminated. Shelton Benjamin is out at #20 and he must be thrilled that Shawn Michaels is not entered into this year’s Rumble match. Punk and Jericho precariously fight with each other on the top rope. Benjamin hops up there with both of them and takes both guys down to the mat. HHH tosses Punk, but he manages to hang on.

William Regal is out at #21 and I don’t see him being the guy that will help thin the herd. He goes after Punk, who just recently beat him for the Intercontinental title. A big boot by the Undertaker eliminates Mark Henry off camera. #22 is Kofi Kingston and hits everyone in sight. Although with as many guys in the right as there are right now, he barely has to move and he can hit someone. Taker catches a flying Benjamin and slams him to the mat. He then casually dumps him out of the ring. Meanwhile Mysterio has wrapped himself upside down around the ring post in order to avoid elimination. Kane is the #23 entrant and hopefully he can do some house cleaning. Kane and Taker have a face off and decide they’ll team up this year. They chokeslam Dibiase together. Meanwhile Punk manages to pull Regal over the top rope and send him to the floor. What’s up? Well R-Truth is out at #24. That’s what’s up. A numbers of guys team up to get rid of Kane, but they are unsuccessful. In a surprise return, Rob Van Dam enters at #25. He jumps in and hits Kane with a kick. A big RVD chant breaks out. As he hits Rolling Thunder on HHH and R-Truth, THE Brian Kendrick enters at #26. As Kingston does a 10 punch count on Knox, Kendrick runs up and shoves Kingston out of the ring. HHH then grabs Kendrick and immediately pitches him out of the ring. That may be the fastest elimination for someone who also manages to eliminate someone else. RVD throws Punk over the top rope, and he has another close elimination. #27 is Dolph Ziggler who sprints to the ring. He introduces himself to Kane, who takes his hand and immediately throws him out of the ring. #28 is Santino Marella. Upon entering the ring, he is immediately and I do mean immediately clotheslined right back out by Kane. That just broke the Warlord’s 2 second record. Crowd is legitimately bummed about that quick exit thought. Thus far the high numbers have not been very lucky. It’s another surprise at #29 as the very first Rumble winner, Hacksaw Jim Duggan comes out at #29. Crowd starts a USA chant. He should have been the guy to get the one second elimination. Finally at #30 is the Big Show and we can only hope he finally clears the ring of the midcarders.

He opts to square off against Taker instead. But before they can go at, Kane hits Show with an uppercut. Duggan comes over and tries to slam Show, but you can imagine how that goes. Show quickly dumps Duggan after that foolish attempt. Jericho hops on Show’s back and applies a sleeper. Show breaks out of it with a sideslam. Show grabs R-Truth and press slams him out of the ring. Show throws Punk out three times, but each time he manages to hang on. However, on the third save, Show walks over and punches him to send him to the floor. Meanwhile Mysterio and Knox have been eliminated, but the camera failed to capture how it happened. Hornswoggle comes in for some reason and goes after Kane. Kane easily swats him away and then eliminates Finlay. Not sure what the point of that was. Replays show that Big Show had eliminated Knox and Mysterio as they were fighting each other. Orton grabs HHH and hits him with a DDT from the second rope. Show and Taker now go at it slugging each other. RVD hits the five star frog splash on Orton, but as he gets up, Jericho throws him out of the ring. As Jericho smiles at his work, he turns around and gets attacked by Taker. Jericho manages to hit Taker with the codebreaker, but when he attempts a clothesline, Taker sidesteps him and dumps him out of the ring. As Kane attacks Orton, Dibiase and Rhodes run up behind him and throw him out. Legacy now work together on Taker while Show goes after HHH. Taker fights back and manages to deliver a chokeslam to all three of them. Taker boots Show, but he too manages to hang on. Taker tries to knock Show off the apron, but Orton comes over and attempts an RKO. Taker blocks that effort, but when he goes back over to Show, he gets pulled over the top rope. As they fight on the apron, Orton comes over and jawjacks Show to knock him to the floor. Taker continues to fight Legacy from the apron when Show yanks him to the floor. Taker and Show continue their brawl on the floor. Meanwhile, we’re down to the Final Four consisting of HHH and all three Legacy members. I don’t like those odds. The three of them triple-team HHH with Orton barking out orders. Orton goes for an RKO, but HHH shoves him off. As HHH attempts to Pedigree Rhodes, Orton comes over. HHH manages to backdrop Orton, but he hangs onto the apron. HHH completes the Pedigree on Rhodes and then throws out Dibiase. HHH grabs Rhodes and throws him out as well. However as he does that, Orton comes back in and comes up behind HHH to dump him out and win the match. Legacy then celebrate together in the ring to zero response from the crowd.

Bottom Line: Man, that was a rather uninspired finish to the match. I don’t care for Orton winning at all, but they at least could have done something more creative. Having Legacy team up killed the whole ‘every man for himself’ mantra associated with the match. The lack of response by the crowd proves they didn’t do a good job in either choosing a winner or effectively closing the match. As for the rest of the Rumble, I did like the number of creative near eliminations that several guys exhibited. That was a lot of fun. However, they needed more eliminations spread out throughout the match. Too many guys were still in there at the end and no one had the ability to do much other than punch and kick before the mass exodus in the closing minutes. This one is a definite drop in quality over last year’s. *** ¼

NMR: 50/50

2012-01-27T00:43:00.001-05:00

Dealing with a subject like cancer in a film can be difficult. Trying to blend comedy and drama in a film about cancer - even harder. And yet somehow, the people behind 50/50 not only manage to pull it off, but make it look easy in the process. Joseph Gordon-Levitt turns in yet another great performance as Adam, the young man who learns he has a rare form of spinal cancer. Not only does he have to deal with his cancer, he also has to deal with people who are trying to deal with the fact that he has cancer. I really appreicated the insight the film has on interpersonal communication as it relates to this subject. The interactions Adam has with his doctor, his grief counselor (played by Anna Kendrick), his mother (Anjelica Huston), his girlfriend (Bryce Dallas Howard), and everyone else in his life feel realistic and illuminating. Sometimes people are the most insensitive when they're trying their hardest to be sensitive. I should also point out that Seth Rogen, who plays Adam's best friend, gives his best performance in years here. He provides some great laughs, yet never belittles the situation or takes you out of the moment. His character is nothing he hasn't played before, yet his personal connection to the story (the film is loosely based on Will Reiser who wrote the film and is a good friend of Rogen's) enables him to be more authentic here. If I had to quibble, it's that I felt the film was a bit short and actually could have expanded more on some of its subplots. That aside, this is a terrific little film with a superb cast that has sadly gotten overlooked this awards season. Even with the heavy subject matter, you would be doing yourself a favor and checking this one out. Rating: **** 1/2

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2008

2012-01-26T23:42:00.000-05:00

Madison Square Garden was once again the setting for the Rumble in 2008 and as usual, the New York crowd was as boisterous as ever. Thankfully the WWE gave them plenty to respond as a result of several surprises sprinkled throughout the match including a major one at the very end.

2008 Royal Rumble

Emanating from Madison Square Garden in New York City, NY

In the ‘why haven’t they thought about doing this sooner’ category, Mr. ‘Let’s Get Ready to Rumble’, Michael Buffer does the ring announcements to open the match. Things get off to a very interesting start as our first two entrants this year, are the same as last year’s final two entrants – The Undertaker and Shawn Michaels. Michaels attempts to use his speed to his advantage, but Taker quickly overtakes him with his power. Taker goes for a running boot, but Michaels avoids it. #3 is Santino Marella and I don’t like his chances. He tries to prove he can hang with the two future hall of famers, but Michaels quickly superkicks him. Taker then dumps his limp body out. Michaels tries to come up behind Taker and dump him as well, but Taker hangs on. Taker goes for Old School, but Michaels pulls him down. As Michaels hits a flying forearm, The Great Khali enters at #4. Taker chokeslams Michaels and then goes right for Khali. As Khali kicks away at Taker, the crowd begins a ‘You can’t wrestle’ chant. Gotta love the NY fans. Khali goes for his chop, but Taker ducks it and throws him out. Taker and Michaels resume their battle as Hardcore Holly comes out at #5. Taker shifts his focus to Holly and goes after his arm. Taker grabs Michaels and attempts to throw him out again, but Holly breaks up that attempt. #6 is John Morrison and he goes after everyone. Michaels throws Morrison over the top rope, but he manages to hang on. After hitting a flying elbow, Michaels goes for Sweet Chin Music, but Morrison blocks it and delivers a kick of his own. New York’s own Tommy Dreamer enters at #7. He comes in as a house of fire, punching everyone in sight. A ‘Tommy Dreamer’ chant breaks out. This is apparently going to be a front loaded Rumble as #8 is Batista. He takes down everyone and then has a staredown with the Undertaker, who he fought at Wrestlemania last year. Before they can go at it, Dreamer interrupts. Batista pitches him out for that. Crowd doesn’t like that. #9 is nobody…oh wait nevermind, I just had to look closer because it’s Hornswoggle. He sizes up the humanity that’s currently in the ring and decides to immediately hide underneath the ring instead of try to compete. The action resumes in the ring with Batista spearing Taker. Holly clotheslines Michaels over the top rope, but he hangs on. Chuck Palumbo is out at #10 as the world asks ‘Why?’. The pairs squaring off right now include Taker/Palumbo, Michaels/Morrison, and Holly/Batista.

The #11 entrant is Jamie Noble, who was feuding with Palumbo at the time. He naturally goes right after him. Palumbo gets Noble over the top rope and boots him to the floor with relative ease. Michaels throws Morrison over, but he again does an impressive job of holding on. #12 is Punk who delivers running knee strikes to everyone until he gets dropped by a Taker clothesline. Palumbo gets Punk up on his shoulders, but Punk escapes and throws Palumbo over. He hangs on, but a running knee by Punk is enough to knock him to the floor. Michaels and Punk go at it as Cody Rhodes comes out at #13. Rhodes was a ‘wet behind the ears’ rookie at this point, but that doesn’t stop him from deciding to go after Taker. We might get some ring clearing now as Umaga is out at #14. He hits Holly with the Samoan Spike, which sends him out to the floor. He now begins to hammer down Batista. #15 is Snitsky and he attacks both Rhodes and Morrison. Rhodes hops on Snitsky’s back and nearly falls out of the ring in the process. Punk attempts to hit Morrison with the GTS when Morrison’s partner, The Miz, comes out at #16. Taker is trying his darndest to get Umaga out, but the big man won’t go. #17 is Shelton Benjamin, who immediately hops onto the top rope and delivers a double noggin knocker to Morrison and the Miz. Both men manage to stay on the apron, however. He knocks down Punk only to be hit with a superkick by Michaels that eliminates him from the match. Once again Michaels is Benjamin’s Achilles heel. A big surprise at #18 as it’s the Superfly, Jimmy Snuka. He comes in and takes it to everyone who comes after him. Then it’s our second surprise in a row as Rowdy Roddy Piper is out at #19. He quickly locks eyes with Snuka and they renew their decades old rivalry. Everyone else in the ring stop to watch these two go at. #20 is Kane who brings us back to reality by immediately eliminating both Snuka and Piper. Taker looks to chokeslam Kane, but changes course midstream and delivers it to Michaels instead.

Carlito is out at #21 and spits some apple in Rhodes’ face. Another NY native, Mick Foley in the #22 entrant. He attacks everyone as Taker powerbombs Batista. We really could use to thin the herd out at this point. #23 is Mr. Kennedy and he opts to go after Rhodes. He then hits his finisher on both the Miz and Punk. He jaws at the Undertaker, which earns him a chokeslam. Taker starts to catch a second wind knocking down everyone in his sight. As Big Daddy V comes out at #24, Taker grabs Snitsky by the throat and shoves him out of the ring. Taker turns around only to be superkicked out of the match by Michaels. Taker is stunned by that. Michaels has no time to gloat because Kennedy comes up behind him and throws him out. When I wanted some eliminations, I did not have those two in mind. Frustrated, Taker legdrops Snitsky on the announce table. Kennedy throws Rhodes over the top rope, but he hangs on. As he tries to skin the cat, he also tries pulling Kennedy out. Both manage to hang on though. Nice spot. More beef fills up the ring as the #25 entrant is Mark Henry. Hornswoggle emerges from under the ring long enough to pull The Miz, who was teetering on elimination out of the ring. If he keeps doing that, he’ll break Kane’s elimination record with ease. #26 is Chavo Guerrero, who was the ECW Champion at the time, which goes to show you how little they thought of that title if he’s competing in this match. He and Punk, who were feuding at the time go right at each other. After several close calls, Kane finally eliminates Morrison with a boot. Hornswoggle tries his elimination technique again, but foolishly tries it on Mark Henry, who pulls him into the ring instead. Both Henry and Big Daddy V surround Hornswoggle, but before they can do anything, Finlay runs out and attacks both of them with the shillelagh. Finlay then grabs Hornswoggle and takes him to the back thus eliminating both of them despite neither going over the top rope. A major disappointment there. Elijah Burke is the #28 entrant and I frankly had forgotten that he was still in the company at this point. Punk and Guerrero to go at it and Chavo manages to pull Punk over the top rope from the apron and throw him to the floor. A disappointing finish for Punk, but he’s certainly in a better place today. Getting a very good draw is Triple H out at #29. He makes an immediate impact by throwing out Rhodes and Big Daddy V. Now he and Foley go at it, which makes us nostalgic for their classic Rumble match at MSG back in 2000. He whips Foley into Burke and both of them fall over the top rope and to the floor. Umaga misses a charge, which allows HHH to hit him with a Pedigree. #30 is…I don’t believe it…it can’t be..it is..John Cena. This was a MAJOR shock at the time. Cena was out at the time with an injury and still wasn’t due back for several months. The NYC crowd pops huge for this surprise while HHH looks on in disbelief. Cena comes in and takes it to Henry. Cena then pitches out Carlito and Guerrero. Henry gets dumped out by him also shortly thereafter. Cena and HHH have a big staredown and then slug it out. HHH hits a spinebuster on Cena but then gets knocked down by an Umaga uppercut. As Umaga goes for the Spike, Batista spears him. Batista then throws out Kennedy. Batista then clotheslines Umaga out of the ring.

Our final four is Kane, HHH, Batista and Cena. It’s a strong foursome, but it doesn’t last long as HHH and Batista team up to hurl Kane out of the ring. The three guys left stare at each other as the crowd cheers them on. They then do some taunting to fire up the crowd further. There are no alliances here as they all go after each other. Batista manages to connect with spinebusters on both Cena and HHH. Batista goes for a Batista Bomb on Cena, but he blocks it and backdrops him. HHH then clotheslines Batista out to eliminate him. HHH points to the Wrestlemania sign and says that’s what it’s all about while Cena reminds HHH that he made him tap out at a previous Wrestlemania. Now they go back to fighting as they slug it out. Crowd now seems to be behind HHH as they boo Cena’s punches and cheers HHH’s. Cena connects with the five knuckle shuffle. Cena gets HHH up for the FU, but HHH escapes. HHH attempts the Pedigree, but Cena fights out of that. Both men are down after they clothesline each other. Cena boots a charging HHH, but HHH comes back with a DDT. As HHH tries to put Cena out, he blocks it by grabbing the top rope. HHH goes for the Pedigree again, but Cena escapes and back drops HHH out of the ring to score the victory.

Bottom Line: Cena’s return and subsequent victory were a huge surprise and made for a buzzworthy finish to the match. Prior to that, the match had sufficient star power to keep the match entertaining. While it at times had too many guys in there, one thing they did differently this year was they left the middle of the ring open so that two guys could do some more innovative or high impact moves instead of everyone doing the typical punching and kicking near the ropes. There were some aspects of the match that could have been booked better, but they are minor quibbles. This set up some Wrestlemania feuds and kept the lulls to a minimum which makes this a solid Rumble. ****

Will Dwight beet it?

2012-01-26T23:35:00.001-05:00

Rumors are circulating that Dwight from The Office may be getting his own spinoff show. If true, let's hope its success is closer to Frasier than Joey. Here's more on the story, courtesy of EW.com:

Now this is a spin-off worth cheering over: NBC is giving consideration to a new family comedy that would feature The Office character Dwight Schrute as a farmer.

Yep, you read that right. Deadline is reporting that Schrute – played by Rainn Wilson — would conceivably return home to the family beet farm and bed-and-breakfast. A backdoor pilot would air later this season and take place at the Schrute Farms. If picked up to series, the show would likely air as part of NBC’s midseason lineup in 2013.

“Paul and Rainn have been joking for years about Dwight’s life on the farm, his family and how ill-suited he is to run a B&B,” a source told Deadline. “A while ago, it started to feel like a show to them. NBC agreed, it’s been further developed to include multiple generations, many cousins and neighbors. At its base it will be about a family farm struggling to survive and a family trying to stay together.”

The pitch is not from Office creator Greg Daniels, who also oversees Parks and Recreations and the NBC comedy pilot Friday Night Dinner. Wilson himself came up with idea, as did The Office executive producer-showrunner Paul Lieberstein. Should NBC go ahead with the spin-off as well as a ninth season for The Office, Wilson is expected to return to the mothership in the fall before moving onto the new show, Deadline says.

This isn’t the first time NBC explored the possibility of an Office spin-off. Parks and Recreation was originally pitched as an Office spinoff until Daniels and SNL vet Michael Schur took it in a different direction and developed it as a mockumentary about small-town government. But even then, Daniels wouldn’t close the door on a spin-off.

“It’s possible that some combination of other Office people could produce it without my giving blood for it,” he told members of the press.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2007

2012-01-25T00:29:00.000-05:00

While they had and would have longer and more notable face-offs, the Shawn Michaels/Undertaker mini-match that caps off this Rumble helps it stand out from many of the others in its history.

2007 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the AT&T Center in San Antonio, TX

This year’s Rumble starts off with style as Ric Flair is #1. He’s gone an hour before to win it, but that was 15 years earlier. And things don’t start off easy for him as Finlay is #2. Finlay tries to overpower Flair to begin, but he comes back with some chops. Finlay hoists Flair up, but Flair rakes his eyes before he can toss him out. #3 is Kenny Dykstra and he had issues with Flair at this time. As Dykstra puts the boots to Flair, Finlay comes up from behind him and tries to toss him out. Participating in his second match tonight is Matt Hardy out at #4. We’ve paired off now with Dykstra and Hardy going at it and Flair tussling with Finlay. Nobody’s been eliminated yet, but that may change because Edge is out at #5. He comes in and hits spears on Flair and Finlay. Hardy is able to avoid one and then hits Edge with a Twist of Fate. Flair goes outside and brings a chair into the ring. Before he can use it though, Edge grabs him and throws him to the floor. In response, Dykstra mocks the Flair strut, but Edge grabs him and throws him out as well. Nice! Tommy Dreamer is the #6 entrant and he goes right after Edge. #7 is another ECW representative, Sabu. Before getting in the ring, he sets up a table on the outside. He then comes in and attacks his hardcore brethren, Dreamer. Gregory Helms is #8 and he attacks Hardy, who he was feuding with at the time. Finlay comes close to eliminating Sabu, but he’s able to put on the brakes. #9 is Shelton Benjamin and he tries to make an impact by eliminating both Dreamer and Hardy, but both guys manage to hang on. That table Sabu set up remains untouched, but I can’t imagine that will stay that way for much longer as they’ve already made several elimination teases near it. The ring is starting to fill up, but have no fear because Kane is out at #10 to thin the herd. His first victim is Tommy Dreamer. He backdrops Sabu over the top rope and then chokeslams him off the apron and through the table. See told ya.

It’s clobbering time because C.M. Punk is out at #11. He opts to go right after Edge. Putting the ‘royal’ in Royal Rumble is King Booker at #12. He comes in and immediately dumps Helms. Nobody else is real close to being eliminated at the moment. #13 is Super Crazy. That prompts JBL to start busting out some of his racist jokes. #14 is Jeff Hardy and he teams up with his brother to attack everyone. Even with as many guys in the ring as there are, they’re able to hit Kane with Poetry in Motion. If you’ve begun to smell stale beer, it’s because Sandman has emerged at #15. He starts attacking everyone with a kendo stick, but before he can really get rolling, Booker tosses him out. Looks like we’ve got our Bushwacker winner of the night. Sidenote: it’s probably unfair to keep calling this the Bushwacker award since there have been other guys like the Warlord and Mo who have had far shorter durations in this match than either of those two guys. Eh, who cares. Bushwacker award works. Finlay tosses Jeff Hardy over, but he skins the cat to come back in. Punk manages to do the same thing after Kane attempts to throw him out. Edge’s partner at this time, Randy Orton is the #16 entrant. He teams up with Edge to quickly eliminate Super Crazy and both Hardyz. They could become a force in this match. #17 is Chris Benoit and he attacks everyone in the ring. JBL as an announcer is like a human Wikipedia – providing endless useless facts, only some of which are accurate. Rob Van Dam is out at #18 and he too takes shots at everyone. Kane grabs Booker and throws him out. This displeases the King. Booker comes back in the ring and hits Kane with an axe kick. He then throws Kane over the top rope and brawls with him on the outside. This would be their feeble attempt at starting a feud with these two. As the referees try to separate those two, Viscera comes out at #19. Lawler stupidly asks if anyone can get the 400 lbs. Viscera out despite the fact that he has announced several Rumble matches in which one guy has been able to eliminate him. Johnny Nitro enters at #20 and unsuccessfully tries to throw out RVD. Benoit throws Benjamin over the top rope and he shows some incredible strength by holding onto the bottom rope and avoiding having his feet touch the floor.

Kevin Thorne is #21 and if you don’t remember this guy, don’t worry. This match is only five years old and I barely remember the guy. Pro wrestling was one of the few places where the vampire craze never really took off. RVD hits Viscera with several clotheslines, but cannot get him over the top rope. There are too many guys in there right now and with Hardcore Holly coming out at #22, we’ll have to wait at least another 90 seconds before a mass exodus will take place. Benjamin monkey flips RVD over the top rope, but he manages to hang on. Virtually everyone in the ring works together to try and get Viscera out. No one is paying attention to that, however, because Shawn Michaels is out at #23. He takes on Finlay and makes quick work of him. Michaels then superkicks Viscera, which is enough for the rest of the entrants to then propel him over the top rope and out. Benjamin charges at Michaels, but gets backdropped out of the ring. Man, Benjamin never could catch a break against Michaels. That thins things out somewhat. #24 is Chris Masters and receives zero response from the crowd. At least JBL has enough sense to mock him. Nitro goes up top, which is never a good move. It still holds true here as Benoit knocks him out. Chavo Guerrero is #25 and he goes after Masters. Meanwhile, Benoit continues to do his part in eliminating deadweight by dumping Thorne. MVP is #26 and his theme song tells us (warns us?) he’s coming. RVD dropkicks Masters who falls out of the ring in comedic fashion. Orton gets Punk over the top rope, but Punk does a good job of managing to hang out. Getting the lucky #27 (more guys have won from this spot than any other) is Carlito. Chavo and RVD team up in an attempt to eliminate Michaels. #28 is The Great Khali and I’d imagine we’ll get a mass exodus here. He delivers headbutts to everyone in front of him. Everybody but Khali is now down on the mat. Now he begins to eliminate people starting with Holly. The Miz enters at #29 and immediately gets thrown out by Khali. I think he just took the Bushwacker award away from Sandman. Meanwhile Khali has now also eliminated Benoit, RVD, Punk, Carlito, and Chavo. Before he can toss out anybody else, The Undertaker comes out at #30 to round out the field. Those two slug it out with neither one dropping. Taker blocks a Khali bomb attempt and then clotheslines Khali out of the ring. Taker grabs MVP and connects with Old School. He then dumps him out of the ring.

That brings us to our Final Four of The Undertaker, Shawn Michaels, Randy Orton, and Edge. A solid quartet comprised of all legitimate contenders. Taker tosses Edge, but he manages to hang on. Behind him, Orton nails Taker with a chair. Edge starts to go for a spear, but Orton sees him. Orton thinks his partner was trying to double cross him, while Edge claims he was going for Taker. Orton stops bickering with Edge long enough to give Michaels an RKO. Edge and Orton now team up to attack Taker. Taker has been busted open from Orton’s chair shot. Taker manages to comeback and clotheslines both of them. He then hits Edge with Snake Eyes and a big boot. As he attempts to chokeslam Orton, Edge hits him with a spear. Edge then blasts Taker with another chair shot. They attempt to hit Taker with a Con-chair-to, but Michaels gets back up. He backdrops Orton out of the ring and then superkicks Edge out. We’re down to Michaels and Taker. Both of them are down and then situp/kip up at the same time. Michaels attempts a 10-punch count, but Taker shoves him down. Now Taker sends Michaels to the corner and slugs away at him. Taker whips Michaels to the corner where he does his flip, flop, and fly sell. Taker goes for a big boot in the corner, but misses and falls to the apron. Michaels tries to knock Taker off the apron, but Taker blocks it. As they slug it out, the crowd chants for ‘HBK’. Taker drops Michaels with a big boot. Taker lifts Michaels over the top rope, but he hangs on. Both men go to the top rope, but Michaels knocks Taker down. He follows that up with a flying elbow. With Taker down, Michaels begins to tune up the band. He goes for the superkick, but Taker blocks it and then hits him with a chokeslam. Taker picks up Michaels for a Tombstone, but Michaels escapes and connects with Sweet Chin Music. Michaels goes for another kick, but Taker ducks it and dumps him to the floor for the victory.

Bottom Line: After a mostly forgettable effort, that was quite the finish. We got a 10 minute mini-match between two legends. What made it even better is that either guy could have won it, which left the finish in doubt. With that victory, Taker made history by becoming the first guy to win the Rumble at #30. Prior to the Michaels/Taker stuff this was a disappointing Rumble that failed to yield any memorable spots. As is the case with most of the weaker Rumbles, you had too many guys staying in for too long. And it was also frustrating to see them give such a worthless stiff like Khali the ‘Diesel push’ and have him eliminate a fifth of the roster by himself. The finish saves this one, but doesn’t do enough to make it a great Rumble. ***

One last Party

2012-01-24T21:37:00.002-05:00

While Nintendo has all but given up releasing titles for the Wii as they gear up to launch Wii U, there is one final title we have to look forward to - Mario Party 9, the first one specifically made for the Wii (Mario Party 8 was originally created for the Gamecube and then converted for the Wii). Mario Party 9 has a U.S. release date of March 11th. In the meantime, you can check out what's in store for this latest addition (there appears to be some intriguing changes) in this new trailer that just hit the web.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2006

2012-01-24T00:47:00.000-05:00

Starting with this one, the rest of these Royal Rumble review will be new content that has not been posted anywhere else. Enjoy!

2006 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the American Airlines Arena in Miami, FL

As if things weren’t bad enough that this Rumble is getting a midcard slot, we kick off this year’s match with a cheer from the Spirit Squad. Even though they’re uber-annoying, the crowd can barely muster the energy to boo them. Not a good sign. They certainly wake up though upon seeing that Triple H is #1. #2 is Rey Mysterio, who comes out to the ring in a low ride. He drapes one of Eddie Guerrero’s shirts on the hood. Mysterio is dedicating the match to Guerrero who had passed away two months prior. Mysterio uses his speed to gain an early advantage on HHH. He delivers a 10-punch count on HHH as the crowd chants ‘Eddie’. HHH avoids a 619 as Simon Dean rolls out on his Segway at #3. Dean puts the boots to Mysterio as HHH looks on. When Dean asks for a high five from HHH, he gets punched instead. Mysterio and HHH team up and dump Dean to the floor together. As Mysterio connects with a Bronco Buster, Psicosis enters at #4. Psicosis takes it to both guys. As he tries to do a Razor’s Edge on Mysterio, Rey reverses it into a hurricanrana and sends Psicosis out of the ring. Whooo, it’s Ric Flair at #5 and he has issues with HHH. He chops and punches away on HHH. It should be noted that as these two go at, Rey is just lying on the mat. Something he’ll be doing a LOT in this match. Flair makes a charge, but HHH backdrops him out of the ring. Before HHH can catch his breath, Big Show is out at #6. He too was at odds with HHH at this time. Show lays some vicious chops in on HHH as Mysterio continues to lie down. Mysterio gets up long enough to receive a headbutt from Show and he’s back down again. Show delivers a series of elbow drops on HHH. Jonathan Coachman, yes announcer Jonathan Coachman comes out at #7. He foolishly tries to attack Big Show. Show turns around and piefaces Coach right out of the ring. Looks like he’s getting the Bushwacker award tonight. Show returns his focus to HHH as Rey continues to lie on the mat. Bobby Lashley is #8 and he has a staredown with Show. Show attempts to chokeslam him, but Lashley escapes and then backdrops him. Lashley whips Mysterio hard to the corner, so he’ll probably be down for another 5 minutes from that. Big Show’s tag partner at that time, Kane is #9. He slugs it out with Lashley in the proverbial ‘irresistible force meeting the immovable object’ battle. Lashley connects with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex to Kane. After press slamming HHH, Lashley hits Kane with the Dominator. The power moves are nice, but the name of the game is eliminating people, something he hasn’t done yet. #10 is Sylvan and he tries to forge a partnership with Lashley. However, he quickly attempts to double-cross him, which doesn’t end well. Lashley quickly grabs him and heaves him out of the ring. Big Show and Kane are both back up now. They give Lashley a tandem chokeslam and then casually eliminate him. The two tag partners actually go at it while Mysterio and HHH are still lying down. Show and Kane try to eliminate each other when HHH comes up and dumps both of them out of the ring.

#11 is Carlito. He puts the boots to both Mysterio and HHH. Carlito hits Mysterio with the backstabber. That should give Mysterio another reason to take a breaker. Chris Benoit comes out at #12 and delivers chops and suplexes to everyone in the ring. Finally, an infusion of energy into this match. Benoit puts Carlito into the Crossface until HHH breaks it up. Benoit tries to suplex HHH out of the ring, but HHH blocks it and crotches him on the top rope. Benoit knocks HHH down and then connects with the flying headbutt. You better dig it sucka because #13 is Booker T. He goes right after Benoit, who he’s been feuding with recently. Benoit blocks Booker’s elimination attempt and quickly hiptosses him out of the ring. Man Booker gave Coach a run for his money there. Although to be fair, Booker was dealing with a groin injury that probably prevented him from being able to fully compete in this match. Benoit goes back to squaring off against HHH while Carlito has to pick up Mysterio in order to get him to do something. One half of MNM, Joey Mercury, is #14. He attacks everyone until Benoit catches him with a German suplex. The pairs are now Benoit/HHH and Mercury/Carlito leaving Rey to…you guess it…lie on the mat. #15 is Tatanka as a surprise entrant. If that’s the best they can do for a surprise return, things don’t look good for this match. His appearance prompts the Miami crowd to begin the ‘Tomahawk Chop’ chant. Lots of punching and kicking right now with no one near elimination. Mercury’s tag partner, Johnny Nitro is #16. Benoit gets HHH over the top rope, but he manages to hang on. Lawler suggests that Eddie divinely gave Mysterio the #2 entry so he could watch him for a long time. If Eddie has nothing better to do than watch Mysterio laze around for an hour then the afterlife must be extremely boring. #17 is Trevor Murdoch. HHH grabs Mysterio and throws him over, but Mysterio hangs on. He comes back into the ring and immediately clutches the bottom rope. Apparently HHH can’t take the hint that Mysterio has no interest in being active tonight. Another surprise entrant is the returning Eugene at #18. Murdoch punches him, but Eugene no sells it. Eugene gives him an airplane spin that makes both of them dizzy. #19 is Animal from LOD and I’m surprised he can still find shoulderpads that fit over his stomach. We’ve got way too many guys in there right now and most of them are complete losers. #20 marks the big return of Rob Van Dam, who had been out for nearly a year with a knee injury. He delivers kicks to everyone who comes within distance of him. Animal charges at him, but he backdrops him out of the ring to clear some deadweight.

Orlando Jordan is #21, but frankly I think I would have preferred the other OJ. At least he knows how to eliminate people. What? Too soon? RVD heaves Carlito over the top rope, but he manages to hang on. Now the guy who should have been dedicating this match to Eddie, his cousin Chavo comes out at #22. He goes after Mysterio, no doubt miffed at him stealing his rightful dedication. He now delivers Eddie’s Three Amigos to Joey Mercury. Chavo goes up top to deliver a frog splash, but HHH shoves him to the floor before he can deliver the move. So apparently Eddie had no interest in offering his actual family any divine intervention in this match. There’s still way too many guys in there. Matt Hardy enters at #23 as we still wait for a top guy to come out and do some house cleaning. MNM team up and hit Tatanka with the Snapshot. That’s enough to eliminate him. He’s Super…he’s crazy…he’s Super Crazy and he’s also #24. More punching and kicking and a whole lot of nothingness. Oh thank heavens it’s Shawn Michaels at #25. He attacks everyone in sight. Then he gets productive by dumping Murdoch out of the ring. I was hoping for more than just that though. That loud sigh of indifference you hear is the indication that Chris Masters is out at #26. Matt Hardy and HHH come close to eliminating each other, but both manage to hang on. Shawn Michaels uses a headscissors to try and eliminate Mercury, but his partner grabs him to prevent him from going out. The world’s largest love machine, Viscera is our #27 entrant. He grabs Matt Hardy and gives him the Walrus. And if you don’t know what that is, consider yourself lucky. I’m sure Matt created a whiny YouTube video complaining about being treated like that. Hardy tries to give Viscera the Twist of Fate, but Vis picks him up and throws him out of the ring. Led to the ring by his momma, Shelton Benjamin comes out at #28. Meanwhile Benoit manages to unceremoniously eliminate Eugene. It’s yet another surprise entrant as #29 is Goldust. Still more punching and kicking. And if you’re wondering is Rey Mysterio is lying on the mat, well he is. #30 is Randy Orton and I wonder what he did in order to get that number. He runs in and immediately eliminates Benoit. Given how much worthless talent is still in the ring, that seemed unnecessary.

With all entrants out we still have over a third of them still in this match. Carlito and Masters team up to eliminate Viscera. As Masters celebrates, Carlito takes the opportunity to throw him out of the ring as well. Let it be known that nobody will ever confuse Chris Masters for an intelligent man. Goldust grabs Carlito and is able to hit him with Shattered Dreams. However, he then gets blindsided by an RVD kick, which knocks him out of the ring. Meanwhile Orton gets Jordan over the top rope and knocks him off the apron to eliminate him. Shawn Michaels hits HHH with the flying forearm. Before he can get rolling, MNM attack him from behind. They attempt to give him the Snapshot, but he escapes. He then manages to eliminate both of them single-handedly. Michaels turns around only to be hit with a kick by Benjamin. Michaels recovers and gets him over the top rope. Benjamin hangs on, but Michaels hits him with Sweet Chin Music to officially eliminate him. Shawn is cleaning house! But before he can do any more damage, ‘No Chance in Hell’ plays and out comes Vince McMahon. From the outside he starts jawing at Michaels. As Michaels yells back, Shane McMahon runs out of nowhere and throws him out of the ring. Michaels realizes this and chases after him. Before he can do that, HHH cuts him off. Michaels escapes a Pedigree attempt and then runs to the back to go after Shane. That was majorly disappointing. Back to the ring when an RVD spin kick sends Carlito out of the ring. We’re now down to our Final Four consisting of RVD, Randy Orton, but our #1 and #2 entrants, HHH and Rey Mysterio. Mysterio calls over RVD, no doubt asking if he can do all the work for him. They team up to work over HHH and Orton. RVD goes up top for a frog splash, but HHH crotches him. HHH then catapults Mysterio into RVD, causing him to fall down to the floor and be eliminated. Now Orton and HHH, former Evolution teammates work together against Mysterio. Mysterio is able to divide and conquer though. He drops both of them to the second rope and hits a tandem 619. Orton goes for an RKO on HHH, but he blocks it and hits him with a spinebuster instead. HHH attempts to give Mysterio a spinebuster, but he reverses it into a ‘rana that sends HHH up and over. HHH is stunned. We’re down to Orton and Mysterio. HHH pulls Mysterio out of the ring and sends him into the steps. He then puts him back in the ring to leave him for Orton. Orton picks up Mysterio who is deadweight. As he tries to eliminate him, Mysterio once again reverses it into a ‘rana which sends Orton out of the ring and gives Rey the win.

Bottom Line: This is by far my least favorite Rumble. On the action alone, this would have been already near the bottom. There were very few memorable spots and the roster was one of the weakest of the decade. But what makes this one stand out among other lackluster Rumbles is Rey Mysterio’s ‘performance’. There are so many grating things about it. While he had always been a top star, he got a huge push merely because his friend Eddie passed away. These nauseating levels at which the announcers tried to sell Rey’s success as divine intervention was aptly dubbed ‘Eddiesploitation’ around the Internet. It’s also annoying that Rey’s victory broke the longevity record as he lasted over 62 minutes. When Flair went an hour in ’92, he delivered offensive moves from bell to bell. And yet Mysterio goes into the record book for basically lying on the mat for an hour. I don’t mean to sound bitter, but this one leaves a bad taste in my mouth. *

Newport News

2012-01-24T00:38:00.002-05:00

In case you missed it last week, here's a look at Paul Rudd on Parks and Recreation playing Bobby Newport, Leslie Knope's opponent in the race for city council.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2005

2012-01-23T01:10:00.000-05:00

Once again in 2005, the Rumble match marked the dawn of a new era. Two rising stars were beginning to emerge and it took a little longer than expected to determine which one of them would come out victorious in this match.

2005 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Savemart Center in Fresno, CA

#1 is Eddie Guerrero and #2 is Chris Benoit. At that time it was a dream opening pair. Now, like so many other great moments from that time they are just a grim reminder of what has happened. The two go through some feeling-out moves to kick things off. Before they can truly get going, #3 is out and it’s the $1,000,000 Tough Enough winner, Daniel Puder. Puder opts to go for a mic and announces that he’ll make history by being the first Tough Enough winner to win the Rumble. Benoit and Guerrero don’t take too kindly to that and decide to take out their anger on him. It quickly becomes a game of who can chop him harder. Guerrero delivers the Three Amigos as Hardcore Holly comes out at #4. So things are getting worse for young Puder, since we know Holly hates rookies. Holly decides to get in on the chopfest as Puder is just getting brutalized in there. After an Alabama Slam, Holly does the honor of eliminating Puder. As The Hurricane comes out at #5, Benoit and Guerrero sneak up behind Holly and throw him out. Benoit and Guerrero team up against the Hurricane, but suddenly Guerrero turns on Benoit and tries to eliminate him. Benoit hangs on though and they go back to the Hurricane. Hurricane gets a brief moment of offense before Guerrero backdrops him out of the ring. #6 is Kenzo Suzuki and I look forward to more domination from Benoit and Guerrero. After briefly teaming up, Benoit decides to return the favor and try a sneak attack on Eddie, but he too manages to hang out. Appearing for the second time tonight, Edge is out at #7. He goes after Guerrero, while Benoit and Kenzo continue to go at it. Rey Mysterio enters at #8 and he goes after everyone. Kenzo tries to slam Rey, but Rey escapes and then delivers a hurricanrana to eliminate him. #9 is Shelton Benjamin and that is quite the atheletic fivesome in there right now. Shelton slugs away on Edge, while Benoit tries to get rid of Rey. Eddie comes over and tries to eliminate Benoit. Benoit almost suplexes Eddie out of the ring, but Rey stops them. Booker T is the #10 entrant and he goes after Edge. As Rey and Shelton teeter on the top rope, Eric Bischoff decides to walk down to the ring.

#11 is Chris Jericho and the ring continues to be filled with awesome talent. Jericho hits everyone in his path as Teddy Long now decides to make his way down to the ring. Hmm, something seems to be a-brewing. Making it eight men in the ring now, Luther Reigns enters at #12. Soon, the wrestlers realize that there are four RAW and four Smackdown guys in the ring. They take sides and suddenly go at it, West Side Story style to match the theme of this year’s show. Nicely done. The brand warfare suddenly comes to a halt as Muhammad Hassan comes out at #13. The entrants surround Hassan as he looks to the sky. Everyone quickly has enough of that and beat him up. After putting the boots to him, Rey hits him with a 619 and then as a group they collective throw him out. Politically incorrect? Probably. Crowd-pleasing? You better believe it. And then we come down from that high by seeing Orlando Jordan come out at #14. Why can’t he receive the same treatment as Hassan? Everyone pairs off and Shelton is the closest to eliminating someone, that being Chris Jericho. He manages to hang on though. As if Orlando Jordan wasn’t bad enough, now we get Scotty 2 Hotty out at #15. Thankfully, an upset Muhammad Hassan attacks him before he even gets in the ring and puts him in the camel clutch. It appears Scotty’s night is over before it even began. A lot of people are close to going out, but everyone is still hanging on. #16 is Charlie Haas and he goes after everyone. Suddenly Booker gets on a roll and eliminates Luther and Orlando Jordan. He celebrates that with a Spin-a-rooni, but that allows Rey to dropkick him and Guerrero to eliminate him. Rene Dupree is out at #17 and has brought FiFi with him. Haas quickly grabs Dupree and drops him across the top rope. Then it’s a brief World’s Greatest Tag Team reunion as Shelton and Hass double-team Dupree with the alley-oop splash. Shelton hops up onto the top rope, but Edge shoves him off and to the floor to eliminate him. #18 is Simon Dean, who apparently needs to do some more exercises before he gets into the ring. Back inside, Edge sneaks up behind Guerrero and tosses him out. He then dances like Eddie to draw more heel heat from the crowd. The crowd perks back up again as Shawn Michaels is out at #19. Simon Dean has made it into the ring, but is still exercising. Shawn spots him and immediately dumps him out. Haha, nice. Edge tries to corner Rey, but he’s too quick for him. Haas tries punch away on Shawn, but Shawn dumps him to floor. Whooo! It’s Kurt Angle out at #20. He comes in and gives suplexes and Angle Slams to everyone in sight. He tries for one on Shawn, but he escapes. Shawn goes for Sweet Chin Music, but Kurt puts him in the ankle lock. Shawn escapes and then hits the superkick to quickly eliminate Kurt. Wow!

Huge groans from the crowd as Jonathan Coachman comes out at #21. Coach tries a sneak attack on Benoit, but when that doesn’t work, he runs away and grabs a rope. Rey and Jericho come close to eliminating each other, but to no avail. Mark Jindrak is #22, but no one cares because we’re all focused on Kurt Angle who has come back into the ring and thrown out Shawn Michaels. Angle then grabs the steps and throws them at Shawn. With Shawn busted open, Kurt puts him in the ankle lock. The usual bunch of idiots come out to finally break it up. And that’s how you create a Wrestlemania feud! With order now restored, we get our #23 entrant in the form of Viscera. Everybody is sort of milling around as Paul London enters at #24. Dupree knocks him down and then does his French Tickler. Jericho comes up behind him and throws him out. He then does his own version of the dance, which is better received by the crowd. #25 is John Cena who has two tons of hardware to take off before he can get into the ring. He comes in and immediately runs into Viscera. Viscera charges and Cena is able to backdrop him out of the ring. Snitsky enters at #26 and hits everything in his sight. London hops on Snitsky’s back and tries to apply a sleeper. Snitsky pulls him off and onto the apron. Snitsky then clotheslines him off the apron in one of the sickest bumps ever. London’s 360 flip onto the floor is something to behold. With Snitsky looking strong, it seems appropriate that Kane now comes out at #27. Those two go at it as EMTs tend to London. Kane delivers chokeslams to everyone in sight, but doesn’t eliminate anyone. Finally he grabs Jindrak and throws him out. Coach tries attacking Kane from behind, but that doesn’t work. However, before Kane can attack him, Snitsky knocks him down. With everyone down, Batista enters at #28. He immediately makes an impact by clotheslining Snitsky out of the ring. Big ‘Batista’ chant from the crowd. Batista now goes after Kane and dominates him. Batista catches a charging Jericho and throws him to the mat. The Peeps can celebrate now because Christian, accompanied by Tomko is #29. He goes right after that punk Cena. Cena brushes him off and goes over to pick up Kane and dump him to the floor. Rey talks with Cena and tries to team up with him. We’re left with only one man yet to come out and it is The Man, Ric Flair at #30. Flair high fives Batista and then stomps away on Coach. Batista gives Coach a spinebuster and then Flair throws him out of the ring. Batista then gives Christian a spinebuster. He then press slams him out of the ring and onto Tomko. A disappointing night for Captain Charisma. Flair and Batista now team up on Benoit and eliminate him. Suddenly Flair tries to double-cross Batista and throw him out, but Batista doesn’t budge. Batista looks at him, but before he can do anything Edge and Rey attack him. Edge then goes after Flair and throws him out of the ring. More boos for Edge.

Just like that we’re down to the Final Four of Edge, Batista, Rey Mysterio and John Cena. A good crop of new talent there. Edge manages to get spears on Batista and Cena. He goes for one on Rey, but Rey avoids it. Rey then hits Edge with a 619. Edge recovers and throws Rey over the top rope. Rey hangs on, but then Edge spears him and eliminates him for good. Edge charges at Batista and Cena, but they backdrop him to the floor. We’re down to two! The two stare at each other before slugging it out. Cena gets Batista up for the FU, but Batista blocks it by grabbing the ropes. Batista escapes and then sets up Cena for the Batista Bomb. As Cena tries to escape that, both men end up falling over the top rope and hitting the floor. Different referees believe each man won. Both men go in the ring and both get their hand raised. Suddenly Vince McMahon struts out and tries running into the ring. As he gets in, Vince crumbles to the mat. While he sits there, both referees argue their case. We would learn after the fact that as Vince tried entering the ring, he blew out both of his quads (yeowch!), hence him sitting in the ring. Meanwhile, Batista throws Cena out of the ring. Cena comes back in and throws out Batista. Howard Finkel comes on the mic and announces that this match should restart. Cena attempts the FU, but Batista escapes. He hits Cena with a spinebuster and then throws him out to officially win the Royal Rumble.

Bottom Line: Man, if only that finish had gone off more smoothly. We still don’t know if they had planned the double elimination/restart finish or if it was an error on Cena and Batista’s part. On one hand, it provided a good gauge of how fans responded to both men. However, with both men ultimately getting title shots, they probably should have just made them co-winners right there. Aside from that finish, however, this was a tremendous Rumble. There were so many mini-stories and/or spots peppered throughout this thing that there was hardly a dull moment. This match was also successful in doing more than just establishing a #1 contender. It started up the Angle/HBK feud. It also really helped Edge as a heel as he was there until the end and had some good eliminations of crowd favorites. This would get the full monty with a smooth ending. Instead it’ll have to settle for **** ½

Who wants easy money?

2012-01-23T00:50:00.000-05:00

As many of you know, after Netflix's price hike debacle last fall, I have been using Redbox more frequently for renting new release movies. Well I went on their website earlier today and saw that they are currently offering a promotion where you can win up to 50 cents off a movie rental simply by answering some movie trivia questions. The questions are relatively easy and they provide you with some Who Wants to Be a Millionaire style lifelines as well. It's free to sign up and all you have to do is provide an email address - something you've probably already given them if you've used their service before. Redbox is currently the cheapest route to rent movies and with this, it just got easier. If you're interested, just click on the link below.www.redboxtrivia.com

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2004

2012-01-23T00:30:00.001-05:00

This should have been a memorable Rumble, but the tragic events surrounding Chris Benoit have put a mar on this show that many wrestling fans now refuse to watch.

2004 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Wachovia Center in Philadelphia, PA

J.R. and Tazz are doing the announcing for this. Good. Per order by Paul Heyman, Chris Benoit has to enter #1. #2 is Evolution’s Randy Orton. Benoit begins by kicking Orton down in the corner. Orton tries to toss out Benoit, but he won’t budge. #3 is Mark Henry. Holla Holla Holla! He easily manhandles both men. As Henry works over Benoit, Tajiri comes out at #4. Tajiri lays some kicks into Orton and then hits the handspring elbow. Benoit comes over and hits Tajiri with a German suplex. Henry tosses Orton over, but he hangs on and comes back in. Bradshaw is the #5 entrant and he gives everyone a Clothesline from Hell. However, when he attempts it on Benoit, Chris blocks it and applies the Crossface. Bradshaw gets him up on his shoulders, but Benoit shifts his weight and tosses him to the floor. #6 is Rhyno and he goes after Benoit. Meanwhile, Tajiri somewhat gets Henry in the Tarantula. While in the hold, Rhyno gores Henry, which causes Tajiri to fall to the floor. Then Benoit is able to knock the woozy Henry over the top rope and to the floor. Rhyno and Orton team up against Benoit, but he won’t go out. A replay shows Tajiri had misted Henry before putting him in the Tarantula. After all that craziness, Matt Hardy comes out at #7. Hardy knocks down Rhyno and taunts, so Benoit throws him over the top rope; however he hangs on and reenters. We’re now paired off with Rhyno facing Hardy and Orton taking on Benoit. #8 is Scott Steiner and we can only hope this appearance is better than his last. He comes in and attacks everyone. Getting no response from the crowd is Matt Morgan at #9. Things have slowed down a lot with most of the guys lying down. Flying in at #10 is the Hurricane, who hits Hardy with a high crossbody. Hurricane goes after Morgan, but he grabs him and immediately tosses him to the floor. Morgan throws Hardy over, but he again hangs on.

Can you dig it? Because Booker T is out at #11. He comes in and attacks Steiner. A lot of punching and kicking right now. #12 is Kane, which should mean house cleaning time. Before he gets to the ring, Steiner is eliminated by Booker T. Kane enters and it’s chokeslams for everyone. The buzzer sounds and the Undertaker’s gong plays. Kane freaks out since he buried him at Survivor Series. Waiting to see who it is, Kane gets dumped out by Booker T. Now Spike Dudley comes out as apparently the #13 entrant. Kane grabs him and chokeslams him on the entrance ramp. That, in effect, ends his night before he even gets to the ring. We’ve paired off again as it’s Orton and Rhyno, Benoit and Hardy, and Booker and Morgan. As Rikishi comes in at #14, Benoit backdrops Rhyno out of the ring to eliminate him. Dancing his way out at #15 is Frenchman Rene Dupree. Dupree drops Hardy across the top rope and then knocks him to the floor. Dupree dances in celebration and then is eliminated himself via a superkick by Rikishi. Choo choo! It’s A-Train at #16 and he goes after Rikishi. Morgan misses a big boot on Benoit, who then tosses him to the floor. As most try to gang up on A-Train, Orton comes over and dumps out Rikishi. Now Orton shoves out Booker. As Shelton Benjamin makes his way on out at #17, Benoit is able to eliminate A-Train. Benjamin goes for a big kick on Orton, but he dodges it and throws him out. We’re down to the two men who started this thing. Shades of ’95! Benoit and Orton go at it and end up colliding with each other. With both men down, Lamont runs out to announce #18, Ernest ‘the Cat’ Miller. Those two dance as Tazz hilariously sings along. Somebody call my momma! Benoit and Orton get back up and toss out both of the dancing fools. Nice comedy spot. Orton goes after Benoit again as Kurt Angle enters at #19. I doubt he’s out here for comedy. Naturally, he goes after Benoit; picking up where they left off at last year’s Rumble. Orton gladly takes a break as they fight. Things just got a lot fruitier as #20 is Rico. As Orton gives Rico the RKO, Benoit gives Angle some German suplexes. With Rico out cold, Orton is easily able to dump him to the floor. Benoit goes for a diving headbutt, but Angle pops up top and hits him.

Test’s music plays, but nobody shows up. Suddenly, we cut backstage and see Test lying on the floor. Austin sees he can’t compete and yells at the unseen assailant that he now has to go out as the #21 entrant. We hear the tires screech and Mick Foley comes out. He naturally goes right after Orton. The two slug it out with Foley winning the exchange. Foley hits a running clothesline that eliminates both men. Despite that, Foley continues attacking him on the floor. With all the action, we nearly miss Christian entering at #22. Foley grabs the steps and lays out WWE official, Fit Finlay. He turns around and Orton waffles him with a wicked chair shot. Foley recovers and pulls out Mr. Socko. However, he applies it to Nunzio, who’s the #23 entrant. Now Foley and Orton brawl all the way to the back. Meanwhile, Christian and Benoit attempt to eliminate Angle. As the action continues in the ring, Nunzio sits on the outside and watches. #24 is the Big Show, which is a good number for a man his size. He comes in and beats up everyone. Chris Jericho comes out at #25 and immediately helps his friend Christian against Kurt Angle. Everyone gangs up on Show, but can’t eliminate him. The ring begins to fill up again as Charlie Haas enters at #26. Jericho and Christian throw Benoit over the top rope, but he manages to hang on. Now Christian tries to toss Jericho, but he hangs on as well. When Christian sees this, he comes over and Jericho manages to backdrop him to the floor. So much for that friendship. Making his ‘glorious’ (only in his mind) return is Billy Gunn at #27. He enters and hits Fameassers on Angle, Jericho and Show. Whoopee. #28 is John Cena and Show is waiting for him. But before he enters, Cena spots Nunzio still sitting on the floor and throws him into the ring. Cena then enters and gets jumped by Show. People gang up on Show again as RVD comes out at #29. Everyone kind of mills around waiting to hit the big finish. Rounding out this year’s field is Goldberg at #30. He comes in and delivers a few spears. Nunzio hops on Goldberg’s back, but he still manages to throw Hass out. Goldberg then flips Nunzio off of him and gives him a spear. He then clotheslines Gunn to eliminate him. Good! Goldberg picks up Nunzio and press slams him to the floor. That took care of all the dead weight. As Goldberg goes to jackhammer Show, Brock Lesnar runs out and nails Goldberg with an F5. Sweet! Goldberg yells at Brock, which allows Angle to come up from behind and throw him out. Even better! Everyone goes after Show, but to no avail. Show fends then all off until Jericho chopblocks him. Now everyone hits a finisher on Show. The remaining guys try to pick him up, but aren’t successful. Suddenly Show grabs Cena and throws him to the floor. RVD hops on Show in the corner, but he gets tossed to the floor too.

Our Final Four are Benoit, Angle, Jericho, and Show. I’m definitely cool with that. Show tosses Jericho, but he skins the cat. Jericho goes after Show some more. Again, he gets tossed and again he holds on. Now Jericho hits Show with a top rope bulldog. Jericho puts Show in the Walls of Jericho and he taps. Does no good here. Angle breaks up the hold and brawls with Jericho. Show grabs Jericho and then chokeslams him out of the ring. Angle manages to hit Show with the Angle Slam and then gives one to Benoit too. Angle pulls Show in the ankle lock and again Show taps. Show manages to get to the ropes and leverages himself to eliminate Angle using his legs. Wow! As Show tries to reenter, Benoit hits him with a diving headbutt. Benoit charges, but Show grabs him. Benoit escapes the chokeslam attempt and applies the Crossface. Once again, Show taps. Show gets out and hits Benoit with a sidewalk slam. At this point, Benoit has the longevity record, besting Bob Backlund’s time from ’93. Show presses Benoit, but he manages to shift and get Show in a headlock. Benoit goes over the top rope and starts dragging Show with him. Slowly Benoit keeps tugging and eventually pulls Show to the floor to win it. Benoit has gone coast to coast to win the Rumble!

Bottom Line: Benoit finally won the big one and while recent events have marred this accomplishment, there’s no denying that this was a feel good moment at the time. Even if you ignore Benoit’s victory, this ends up being a pretty fantastic Rumble. There were hardly any slow spots. You also had a few surprises and a few laughs. They also did a nice job at having a large number of stars still in it at the end who could have legitimately won it. Perhaps most important of all, this Rumble did a great job of setting up key feuds that would play out until Wrestlemanaia. That’s always a good mark of decent storytelling. This is a solid Rumble through and through. **** ¾

Star Mangled Banner

2012-01-23T00:15:00.000-05:00

Since the Internet is abuzz with Steven Tyler's poor performance of the National Anthem, I thought I would post one of the most wonderfully awful version ever done - Leslie Nielsen as Frank Drebin posing as Enrico Pallazzo in The Naked Gun.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2003

2012-01-22T02:40:00.001-05:00

Yet another wrinkle was added to the Rumble match in 2003 now that the company had split into two brands. Each brand provided 15 entrants into the match and the winner would get a championship match against their brand's champion at Wrestlemania that year.

2003 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Fleet Center in Boston, MA

One of the stories going into this match is the developing feud between Shawn Michaels and Chris Jericho. Jericho was out to prove he was just like Shawn, only better. When Vince made Shawn #1, Jericho made himself #2 so that he could not only beat Shawn, but go the distance just like Shawn did back in ’95. As Shawn waits in the ring, Jericho’s music plays, but it’s revealed that it’s Christian in the aisle. Jericho comes through the crowd and attacks Shawn from behind. Jericho goes outside, grabs a chair and nails Shawn with it. Shawn’s been busted open from that. Chris Nowinski comes out as our #3 entrant, but stays at ringside to allow Jericho to continue his beatdown. With Shawn completely out of it, Jericho picks him up and dumps him over the top rope to eliminate him. Wow! Rey Mysterio is out at #4 and he immediately hits Jericho with a springboard dropkick. Those two do some more fast-paced action as Nowinski continues to look on from ringside. With Rey on the top turnbuckle, Jericho tries to shove him out, but Rey manages to hang onto the post. As Rey makes his way back inside, Nowinski finally comes in and gangs up on him. #5 is Edge, who comes out to help his friend. Edge and Rey clear Jericho and Nowinski out of the ring, but neither went over the top rope. Now Edge and Rey go at it and have a fantastic sequence with both men nearly eliminating the other. Christian enters at #6 and immediately hugs his brother Edge. Edge pretends to reciprocate the love and then spears him. Rey gets on Edge’s shoulders to do a double-team move, when Nowinski comes in and tosses both over the top rope. They both hang on and reenter by giving Nowinski tandem missile dropkicks; one of which nails him right in the face. Brutal looking spot there. As Rey gives Nowinski the Bronco Buster, Chavo Guerrero comes out at #7. Rey and Chavo do some awesome stuff with Rey connecting with the 619. After giving another one to Christian, Rey goes for the West Coast Pop on Nowinski. Nowinski blocks it, but Rey manages to ‘rana him over the top rope and to the floor. As Rey comes back in, Jericho runs over and clotheslines him out of the ring to end his night. Tajiri is the #8 entrant and he gives everyone some stiff kicks. Out #9 entrant is Bill DeMott and he hits everyone in his path. DeMott throws Jericho over, but he hangs on. We’ve paired off now with DeMott taking on Edge, Chavo battling Christian and Jericho trying to eliminate Tajiri. #10 is Tommy Dreamer and he’s brought weapons with him. Dreamer comes in and delivers cane shots to everyone. Edge grabs a cane and the two of them pelt DeMott (which I’m loving). One big cane shot by Edge is enough to knock DeMott over the top rope and to the floor. Jericho and Christian grab trash can lids and nail Dreamer. Those shots knock him out and they easily eliminate him. Tajiri attempt to put Jericho in the Tarantula, but Jericho shoves him off to end his night.

#11 is Bull Buchanan, who comes out and attacks everyone until Edge whips him into the corner and throws him out. Bull gets the Bushwhacker award tonight. Edge whips Chavo over the top rope, but he hangs on. As he tries to come back in, Edge spears him to the floor. Edge tosses Jericho, but he hangs on and reenters to dump out both Edge and Christian. Jericho left alone. He doesn’t wait long before RVD comes out at #12. RVD gets the better of Jericho in their early exchange. RVD catapults Jericho over the top rope, but he again hangs on. Now Matt Hardy appears at #13. Matt Fact: Matt strongly dislikes mustard. Matt is joined by Mattitude follower, Shannon Moore. Matt teams up with Jericho to beat up RVD. RVD recovers and plays divide and conquer. RVD hits Jericho with the Five Star Frog Splash. Matt grabs RVD and tosses him, but RVD hangs on. #14 is Eddie Guerrero and he takes on everybody. RVD attempts to eliminate Eddie, but Matt makes the save. Eddie hits RVD with the frog splash, only to be given the Twist of Fate by Matt. As Matt stands tall, Jeff Hardy enters at #15. Matt tries to make peace, but Jeff will have none of it. Jeff tosses Matt out, but Shannon Moore prevents him from hitting the floor. Jeff sets Matt up for the swanton bomb, but Shannon comes in and tries to stop him. Shannon lays on top of Matt, so Jeff just gives both of them the swanton. Our streak of decent workers ends when Rosey enters at #16. The pairs right now are Jeff/Matt, Rosey/RVD, and Jericho/Eddie. The Testicles are pleased to see Test at #17. He comes in and is dominant. He tosses out Jericho, who again manages to hang on. The buzzer rings and out comes #18, John Cena with a rap. His rhymes go on for nearly the full 90 seconds and are quite enjoyable. Even Tazz seems to get a kick out of them. Oh how I miss those days. RVD’s heard enough though, and comes out to throw him into the ring. It’s now time for #19, one half of Team Angle, Charlie Haas. The ring is filling up quickly. As Jeff goes for the corkscrew moonsault, RVD shoves him to the floor. Making his 8th Rumble appearance, the 20th entrant is Rikishi. Rikishi and Rosey briefly team up before Rosey turns on him.

Rosey’s partner in crime, Jamal, is our #21 entrant. Rikishi quickly knocks him down and gives him a stinkface. Jericho heaves RVD over, but he hangs on. #22 is Kane and hopefully he’ll clear the ring of some dead wood. He grants my wish by eliminating Rosey. Kane tosses Jericho over, but somehow he manages to hang on. Jericho has had the most near eliminations ever in the history of the Rumble. His ability to hang on has been incredible. Shelton Benjamin is #23 and he immediately does a double-team move with Haas on Cena. How great are these guys? There are several near eliminations, but nobody goes. At #24 is Booker T and he makes an immediate impact by giving Kane a scissors kick and Matt a flapjack. After doing a spinaroonie, Booker grabs Eddie and throws him out of the ring. All aboard! It’s A-Train at #25. He attacks a bunch of people, but doesn’t eliminate anybody. Suddenly, Shawn Michaels runs out and attacks Jericho. His attack allows Test to come over and toss Jericho out. Now Shawn flies over the top rope and lands on Jericho. As the referees separate those two, Maven comes out at #26. There are still no eliminations when Goldust makes his entrance at #27. Goldust attacks Team Angle and then gives Maven Shattered Dreams. Team Angle work together to eliminate Goldust. They follow that up by getting rid of Booker. That’s somewhat disappointing. #28 is Batista and he hits everything in his way. Test tries to get rid of Batista, but when he goes for the big boot, Batista ducks and Test falls all the way to the floor. Now Batista clotheslines Rikishi out of the ring. Making his second appearance of the night, Brock Lesnar comes out at #29. Team Angle try to get rid of him, but he reverses their momentum and tosses both of them out. Then Brock picks up Matt and F5s him on top of Team Angle. Everyone gets on their feet, because they know that #30 is the returning Undertaker. He makes an immediate impact by clotheslining Cena and Jamal out of the ring. Maven nails Taker with a dropkick, but doesn’t get the same result as last year. Taker grabs Maven and chokeslams him. Then he throws him to the floor. Kane and RVD team up to eliminate A-Train from the match. RVD wants Kane to press slam him onto Batista, but Kane press slams him out of the ring instead.

That leaves us with a Final Four of Kane, Batista, Taker and Brock. Kane and Batista clothesline each other. As Brock and Taker stare each other down, Kane and Batista attack them. Brock battles Batista and Kane himself and gives Kane an F5. Taker and Brock go at it and Brock gets the better of it. Taker reverses an F5 attempt and tombstones Brock. Then he runs over and clotheslines Batista out of the ring. Taker and Kane seemingly team up until Taker grabs Kane and throws him out of the ring. Batista reenters with a chair, but Taker stops him. Taker nails Batista with the chair, but Brock comes up behind Taker and dumps him out of the ring to win it.

Postmatch: Taker comes back in, but it’s just to congratulate him on a job well done.

Bottom Line: This was a highly enjoyable Rumble and had one of the best set of wrestlers in it. The first half of the Rumble was just non-stop action, which nicely utilized a lot of Smackdown’s top stars. The second half dragged a bit because eliminations were few and far between. It wasn’t as bad as it should have been, because most of the guys sticking around were ones you wanted to stay. The worst part of the Rumble was the ending. The final four wasn’t great and it was pretty clear who was winning this thing. Still, this was one of the more entertaining Rumbles in recent years. **** ¼

Power of the punch

2012-01-22T02:18:00.000-05:00

Earlier this week, a clip from Jeopardy became viral after a contestant gave an incorrect and naughty answer. If you haven't seen the clip yet, check it out below.

And if like me you can't get enough of game show bloopers, then you'll want to check out Entertainment Weekly's list of 25 Funniest Game Show Bloopers.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2002

2012-01-22T01:59:00.000-05:00

In 2002, the WWF was going through some big transitions as they tried to find ways to integrate the former WCW guys into their roster. But on this night, they made sure that one of their own, the returning Triple H was front and center.

2002 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Phillips Arena in Atlanta, GA

Rikishi is #1 and Goldust is #2. That is perhaps the oddest pairing to start off the Rumble. By the way, Goldust is one of four superstars making their big return tonight in this match. The two trade rights to begin. Rikishi hurls Goldust over, but he hangs on. Upon re-entry, Goldust goes low on him. Rikishi dumps Goldust again, but again he hangs on. #3 enters and it’s the Big Boss Man. Goldust and the Bossman try to team up, but Rikishi fends them both off. Nothing much happens when Bradshaw comes out at #4. He comes in and manhandles everyone. Rikishi knocks down the Bossman and gives him the Stinkface. Rikishi kicks the Bossman and then clotheslines him out of the ring. Lance Storm comes out at #5 and he goes after Goldust. Rikishi tries to eliminate Bradshaw, while Storm tries to get rid of Goldust. #6 is Al Snow and he attacks everything in sight. Bradshaw blasts Storm with the Clothesline from Hell, but can’t get rid of him. We’ve yet to get a major name in this Rumble as #7 is Billy Gunn. Some of my least favorite stars are in the ring right now. Gunn comes in and gets jumped by Bradshaw. Storm and Snow get each other onto the apron. Snow blocks a kick by Storm and then delivers a kick of his own to eliminate him. Bradshaw gets Goldust onto the apron, but as he tries to kick him to the floor, Gunn comes from behind and dumps him out of the ring. Suddenly things perk up because here’s the Undertaker at #8. Taker comes in and destroys everybody. Out goes Goldust, out goes Snow, out goes Rikishi and finally out goes Gunn. Taker is standing tall and standing alone. Matt Hardy has the unfortunate luck of being #9. The Hardyz have history with Taker, as he recently put both of them and Lita on the shelf. Taker quickly tries to chokeslam Matt when Lita comes in and tries to help. Taker grabs her too, but she kicks him low. Now Matt and Lita put the boots to Taker. As Taker tries to suplex Matt out of the ring, he gets saved by his brother Jeff, who’s out at #10. The Hardyz now begin to double-team Taker. They go for Poetry in Motion, but Taker catches Jeff and dumps him to the floor. Taker then gives Matt the Last Ride and eliminates him.

The sorry sap at #11 is Tough Enough winner, Maven. Taker begins to attack Maven, but the Hardyz come in and jump him again. Taker disposes of them again, but as he talks trash, Maven dropkicks him from behind and knocks him out of the ring. A huge crowd pop for that shocker. Taker comes back in the ring and begins to attack Maven. Taker takes him out of the ring and blasts him with a chair. As the beatdown continues, Scotty 2 Hotty strolls out at #12. Taker knocks down Scotty and then goes back to Maven. Taker takes Maven into the crowd and continues the assault. As Christian comes out at #13, Taker attacks Maven by the concession stand by throwing him through the glass of a popcorn cart. Neither Maven, nor Scotty have been eliminated, but since Christian is the only one in the ring, he takes a rest on the ropes. Scotty finally makes it in and dukes it out with Christian. Meanwhile, Maven for all intents and purposes has been eliminated. As they fight, DDP enters at #14. DDP hits Christian with the Diamond Cutter, but then Scotty kicks him and he falls through the ropes. Scotty then bulldogs Christian and gives him the Worm. However, DDP comes in and throws him out of the ring. The #15 entrant is Chuck Palumbo, who gets into a slugfest with DDP. We get more nothingness when the Godfather returns at #16. The Godfather brings out an entire row of hos and dances with them. While that happens, Christian and Palumbo team up to eliminate DDP off-screen. The Godfather’s antics last the whole two minutes and it’s already time for Albert to come out at #17. He comes in and manhandles everyone. As Albert tries to get rid of the Godfather, Christian and Palumbo come from behind and throw him to the floor. The Godfather attempts the Ho Train on both Christian and Palumbo. However, they both avoid it and then clothesline him out of the ring. Christian and Palumbo start to go at it when Perry Saturn arrives at #18. The three blandly fight for two minutes. The boredom ends when Austin enters at #19. Not surprisingly, he eliminates all three in quick fashion. Realizing he has time to kill, he brings Christian and Palumbo back in and eliminates them again. Austin checks his watch again and waits until another returning star, Val Venis comes out at #20. Austin brings Val in and quickly stomps a mudhole in him. Val starts to mount an offensive, but Austin comes back with the Lou Thesz Press.

Now the #21 entrant, Test makes his way to the ring. Test and Val team up to attack Austin. Heel miscommunication leads to Test giving Val the big boot. Austin is then able to clothesline Val out of the ring. Test goes for the boot on Austin, but misses. Austin then gives him a Stunner and eliminates him. As Austin waits, he gets some competition at #22 in the form of HHH, who’s recently back from quad surgery. The two do a long staredown before going at it. Just as they start going at it, the Hurricane arrives at #23. When he enters, both men are down. He tries to chokeslam both men, but they just look at him and then throw him out of the ring. Austin and HHH go at it again, when we get our #24 entrant, Farooq. Farooq tries to divide and conquer, but soon he suffers a Stunner and then gets clotheslined out by HHH. Austin and HHH continue to go at it when the best of the returning stars, Mr. Perfect joins us at #25. Perfect takes his time to come in, but then jumps Austin when he does. As Austin and HHH try to get Perfect out, he’s able to spit out his gum and swat it away. Truly awesome! Making his first Rumble appearance, here’s Kurt Angle at #26. We’ve paired off now with Angle taking on HHH and Austin squaring off against Perfect. The crowd starts a “You Suck”, “What?” chant. Nice! Angle gets close to eliminating HHH when Austin makes the save. Big Show arrives at #27 and he destroys everybody. Show’s in complete control, but he hasn’t eliminated anyone. Now Kane comes out at #28. He and Show duke it out, but nobody moves. Kane lowblows Show and then slams him over the top rope to get rid of him. Wow! Kane turns around and receives a Stunner from Austin. Angle then gives him an Angle Slam to the floor. Double wow! We’re back to that foursome duking it out. RVD enters at #29 and with perfect timing. Angle is lying on the mat, so RVD enters by giving him the Five Star Frog Splash. He then kicks down everyone and gives Austin rolling thunder. However, he turns around and receives the Pedigree from HHH. Our final entrant tonight is the five-time WCW champ, Booker T. He comes in and tosses out RVD, who was still out from the Pedigree. Major bummer there. With everyone else preoccupied, Booker decides to do a Spinaroonie. When he pops up though, he gets hit with a Stunner that knocks him over the top rope and to the floor.

We’re left with a Final Four of: Austin, Angle, Perfect and HHH. That’s a pretty awesome quartet. Angle goes for the Angle Slam on Austin, but he escapes and tries for a Stunner. Angle shoves him off and into HHH, who attempts to give him a Pedigree. Austin reverses that and catapults HHH into the turnbuckle. Angle follows that up with an Angle Slam on HHH. Awesome sequence! Now Angle gives Austin three German suplexes. Angle and Perfect try to eliminate Austin, but can’t get it done. Austin hoists Perfect up, but Angle runs up and dumps Austin to the floor. Shocking! Austin pulls Perfect out of the ring and starts to attack him. Angle comes out and throws Austin into the steps. As Angle and Perfect put the boots to HHH, Austin comes in with a chair and blasts both of them. Then he nails HHH. Perfect holds HHH for Angle, but Angle accidentally clotheslines Perfect instead. Perfect and Angle now battle. Perfect hits Angle with the Perfectplex and Perfect neckbreaker. However, HHH gets up and clotheslines him out of the ring. HHH tackles Angle and punches away on him. Angle comes back with a belly-to-belly suplex. HHH charges and Angle backdrops him over the top rope. Angle thinks he’s won, but HHH held on. HHH comes back in, gives Angle a facebuster and then clotheslines him out of the ring to win the 2002 Royal Rumble.

Bottom Line: They certainly back-loaded this Rumble. Aside from Taker’s shocking elimination, nothing interesting happened for the first 2/3rds of this Rumble. Given that they had just gained a bunch of talent from WCW, the roster for this Rumble was weaker than you would have expected. The last part of the Rumble was solid, but not strong enough to make this a great one. The returning stars were nice, but it would have been better had they been actual surprises instead of announced weeks prior to the show. In the end, the HHH win wasn’t terribly shocking, but it was the right move, given he was a top star returning from a lengthy injury. *** ½

Let's get Flyer-ed up!

2012-01-22T01:24:00.000-05:00

Seeing this brings a smile to my face. A terrific win by the Flyers today. Way to dominate those losers from Xavier! If we can play like this every game (and not lose to junk teams like Buffalo) then we have a chance of making a splash in this year's tournament.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2001

2012-01-21T03:00:00.000-05:00

By 2001 the WWF was firing on all cylinders and this show kicked off a three month run of possibly the best shows ever produced in professional wrestling. The roster was an embarassment of riches, each of whom was eager to steal the show every night.

2001 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the New Orleans Arena in New Orleans, LA

Jeff Hardy is #1 and Bull Buchanan is #2. Tag team wrestlers kicking this off? Looks like no one will be going the distance this year. Bull gets Jeff on the apron early, but can’t knock him off. As Jeff tries to survive, he gets some help from his brother Matt at #3. They quickly dispose of Bull and now contemplate fighting each other. The two actually go at it until Farooq comes out at #4. The Hardyz try for Poetry in Motion on him and botch it badly. However, they recover to hit Farooq with the Twist of Fate and swanton bomb. That combo allows them to easily dump him out. The brothers go at it again when lo and behold it’s Drew Carey at #5. Drew was at this event to promote an upcoming pay-per-view special. As Drew slowly gets in the ring, the Hardyz battle on the top rope and end up eliminating each other. Drew stands alone! He is not lonely for long because at #6 through hellfire and brimstone it’s Kane! Kane takes his time getting in the ring and then does his corner pyro. Drew offers him some money, but that won’t help. Kane is about to chokeslam Drew when Raven comes out at #7 and attacks him. Drew takes that opportunity to hop over the top rope and eliminate himself. And that, my friends, is a Hall of Fame performance. After being manhandled by Kane, Raven rolls under the ring. He grabs some weapons, but soon Al Snow jumps the gun and comes out prematurely at #8. He attacks Raven on the floor, but the referees wait for the buzzer before they let him in the ring. Snow attacks Kane and Raven with a trash can lid. Then he splits Raven’s uprights with a bowling ball. As Raven and Snow abuse Kane with trash cans, Saturn comes out at #9. Saturn goes for Kane’s leg and attacks it. All 3 men gang up on Kane to try and take him down. Steve Blackman runs out at #10 and adds to this hardcore section of the Rumble with his karate sticks.

Someone who’s not hardcore, Grandmaster Sexay, is the #11 entrant. Kane grabs a trash can and attacks everybody. His shot to Sexay knocks him over the top rope and to the floor. Kane goes on a rampage and eliminates Blackman, Snow, Raven and Saturn in short order. Just as Kane tosses out Saturn, we get a shocker, as the Honky Tonk Man is #12! Honky gets on the mic and plans to sing us a song. Kane isn’t in the mood to listen, so Kane grabs his gee-tar and blasts him with it. Kane shakes his head in disbelief and then tosses him out. Very funny stuff. Out at #13 is The Rock. Wow, early number for him. The Rock is a house of fire, but can’t eliminate Kane. Their battle is interrupted by #14, the Goodfather. The Rock takes a few seconds to give him a few shots and then gives him a big one to knock him right out. The Goodfather gets the Bushwacker award this year. The mood changes at #15 because here comes Tazz. Kane immediately grabs him by the throat and throws him back over the top rope. Sorry Goodfather, Tazz just took the Bushwacker award away from you. The Rock gets Kane up on the top rope, but can’t get him over. Both men are down after The Rock hits Kane with a Samoan Drop. That’s good news for entrant #16, Bradshaw. Bradshaw takes it to both men, but can’t eliminate either of them. #17 is Albert and he goes right for Kane. We’re paired up now as Albert tries to eliminate Bradshaw and Kane goes after The Rock. Coming out to zero reaction is Hardcore Holly at #18. Bradshaw and Hardcore come very close to eliminating The Rock. Now The Rock almost gets rid of Kane. K-Kwik is #19 and he goes after Albert. We’ve suddenly hit a lull in the match. Kane and Bradshaw hit power moves on Hardcore and K-Kwik respectively. That damn siren blares again as Val Venis comes out at #20. The ring is now filling up quickly.

Here to wave to all his people is our goodwill ambassador, William Regal at #21. Regal attacks anyone and everyone he sees. Our pairings are now Val/Bradshaw, Hardcore/The Rock, Albert/Kane and K-Kwik/Regal. Test is #22 and he makes an immediate impact by tossing out Regal. Back from fat camp is the returning Big Show at #23 and he looks bigger than ever. Show makes himself known by dumping Test and K-Kwik quickly. Then it’s chokeslams for everybody else that’s left. However, when he tries one of The Rock, he goes low. A few punches and a clothesline later and The Rock eliminates Show, just like that. Show clears off the announce table and grabs The Rock. Amid the chaos, Crash Holly comes out at #24. Show now takes The Rock and chokeslams him through the announce table. Meanwhile, everyone left, gangs up on Kane. As they try to eliminate him, here comes #25, The Undertaker. Taker fends off all of them to save Kane. Oh yeah, they like each other again now. Sheesh! Taker gets rid of Bradshaw and Hardcore. Kane, meanwhile, eliminates Crash and Albert. Now Taker throws out Val. Only the Brothers of Destruction remain in the ring, but The Rock is still in the match. Before the brothers can go at it, Scotty 2 Hotty comes out at #26. The two team up and just murder Scotty before mercifully dumping him out of the ring. I love it! The Rock is now slowly starting to get up. The brothers wait for the next entrant and they get their money’s worth because here comes Austin at #27. However, before he can get into the ring, HHH runs out and attacks him. The Rock gets back in the ring and Kane and Taker go after him, while HHH attacks Austin in the aisle. We see Austin’s been bloodied as Billy Gunn races out at #28. Ha! Lots of luck Billy. Kane stomps away on Gunn, while Taker and The Rock go at it. We get yet another surprise as Haku is #29. Where did he come from?!? He comes in and takes it to both Taker and Kane. J.R. and Lawler get into this great, heated debate over the fairness of HHH attacking Austin. To nobody’s surprise, it’s Rikishi at #30. Rikishi sees a bloodied Austin in the aisle and attacks him. Austin fights back and throws him into the ring. Now Austin stops a mudhole in Gunn. Yes! Austin then goes over and knocks Haku out of the ring. Taker chokeslams Rikishi as J.R. tells us that Kane has been in there for 50 minutes. Rikishi nails Taker with a superkick that sends him over the top rope and to the floor. Wow! Now Rikishi splashes The Rock in the corner. Rikishi goes for the Banzai Drop, but The Rock gives him a low blow and then dumps him out.

We have our Final Four and it’s Austin, The Rock, Kane and Billy Gunn. Why is Gunn still in there? Why couldn’t Taker or Rikishi last longer? Gunn blocks a Stunner and gives Austin the Fameasser. Give me a break! Gunn tries to throw him out, but Austin reverses it and sends Gunn to the floor. Good! Get him out of here! Now Austin and The Rock meet face-to-face and go at it. The Rock goes for a Rock Bottom, but Austin escapes and then hits him with a Stunner. Austin now connects with the Lou Thesz Press on Kane. As he gets up, The Rock nails him with the Rock Bottom. The Rock grabs Kane and tosses him, but Kane goes through the middle ropes. As Austin and The Rock try to eliminate each other, Kane comes back in and nails both of them. Austin hangs on, but The Rock falls to the floor. We’re down to two. Austin charges at Kane, but Kane grabs him and delivers a chokeslam. Kane grabs a chair and brings it into the ring. Austin stops him from using it, though. Austin escapes a Tombstone attempt and stunners Kane. Austin grabs the chair and gives Kane three big chairshots. With Kane staggering, Austin is able to clotheslines Kane to the floor. Austin wins it and is going to Wrestlemania!

Bottom Line: This was one hell of a Rumble. There were hardly any slow spots in this match. Between the comedy with Drew, the hardcore segment, and the stacked finish, there was always something to keep the crowd entertained. Not to mention, they provided a number of surprise entrants who were all effective. Unlike some Rumbles, this one had a number of stars at the end who could have won it. Some may criticize Austin winning his third Rumble, but given where they were headed, it was the right call. I also have to give credit to Kane, who delivered one hell of a performance. That was one of the most dominant Rumble performances in the history of the match. All in all, there’s very little to complain about this Rumble. **** ½

Slowey recovery

2012-01-21T02:43:00.000-05:00

It appears the Indians didn't waste any time in moving on past Fausto...er...I mean, Roberto Hernandez. From their website:

The Indians acted swiftly in trying to protect their rotation depth.

On Friday, Cleveland completed a trade with the Rockies, acquiring right-hander Kevin Slowey and cash ($1.25 million) in exchange for Minor League reliever Zach Putnam. Slowey will compete for a spot in the Tribe's rotation during Spring Training.

The fact that there is even a competition at all is a sudden development.Cleveland's rotation composition was drastically altered on Thursday, when the starter known to date as Fausto Carmona was arrested outside the United States consulate in the Dominican Republic for using a false identity. The pitcher's actual name is believed to be Roberto Hernandez Heredia.

Indians general manager Chris Antonetti insisted that the club did not acquire Slowey as a direct response to the situation involving Carmona.

"There's obviously some uncertainty with Fausto's situation," Antonetti said. "But as we've talked about throughout the course of the offseason, we've looked for opportunities to improve the team in any way we can. This is a guy we've had interest in for a while.

"For a lot of reasons, this made sense. Certainly, with the uncertainty about Fausto's situation, it gave us maybe a little more clarity about how he'll fit on the club."

Antonetti went as far as to say that the Indians have tried to acquire Slowey in the past.

"We've tried to trade for Kevin multiple times when he was with the Twins," Antonetti said. "Our interest in him has been longstanding. We've actually had dialogue with the Rockies for the better part of the offseason and, ultimately, were able to align at the right value at the right time."

Slowey would presumably compete against right-hander Jeanmar Gomez and lefty David Huff for the lone vacancy on the staff. Slowey does have a Minor League option remaining, so he could be sent to Triple-A Columbus without consequence. Antonetti noted that Slowey was not being considered as a bullpen option at this point.

Carmona was released from jail on Friday, but it is not clear how long it will be before he is able to return to the United States. The pitcher was instructed by Dominican authorities to remain in his native country while prosecutors continue an investigation into the matter.

It is unlikely that Carmona -- the Tribe's Opening Day starter a year ago -- will be in Arizona in time for his team's Feb. 19 Spring Training reporting date for pitchers and catchers. At this point, it is not even clear if Carmona will be a part of the Indians' rotation during the upcoming season.

The Indians are currently working to sort through their options.

Antonetti declined to comment on the matter.

"At this point, we're going to continue to refrain from commenting until we have a little more clarity," he said. "We're still in the process of trying to get some additional information to work through that situation."

The general manager did note that Indians manager Manny Acta has spoken with Carmona.

"Manny's talked with Fausto directly," Antonetti said. "We've had numerous conversations with his representatives as well as people in Major League Baseball and other authorities."

One possibility is that the club will place the pitcher on Major League Baseball's restricted list until the situation is resolved. Under that scenario, Carmona would not receive any of his $7 million 2012 salary until he returned to the United States.

In the meantime, Slowey gives the Indians an extra arm to throw into the mix.

"We feel that we've added and improved the quality of our starting pitching alternatives," Antonetti said. "After stringing together a number of good years with the Twins, Kevin struggled a little bit last year with some minor injuries.

"Our scouts that saw him last year feel he has the ability to get back to where he's been in the past to help our Major League team."

As things currently stand, Justin Masterson and Ubaldo Jimenez figure to compete for the Nos. 1-2 roles on the Indians' starting staff. Right-handers Josh Tomlin and Derek Lowe -- the latter acquired earlier this winter in a trade with Atlanta -- project to occupy to more spots.

Gomez and Huff, who both have Major League experience, follow that foursome on the Tribe's depth chart. Behind them are Minor Leaguers Zach McAllister, Scott Barnes and Corey Kluber.

The 27-year-old Slowey is coming off a subpar season, during which he went 0-8 with a 6.67 ERA in 14 appearances (eight starts) for the Twins. The righty was traded to Colorado on Dec. 6 and promptly avoided arbitration with his new team by inking a one-year contract worth $2.75 million for 2012.

In his big league career, which includes stints with the Twins in parts of five seasons, Slowey has gone 39-29 with a 4.66 ERA across 100 appearances. Between the 2008-2010 seasons, the righty compiled a 35-20 record with a 4.36 ERA. Over that span, Slowey struck out 314 and walked 68 in 406 2/3 innings.

Overall last year, Slowey went 1-11 with a 5.26 ERA in stops at three different levels in the Twins' system. Besides pitching for Minnesota, he spent time with Class A Fort Myers, Triple-A Rochester. Slowey landed on the disabled list twice last year due to a right shoulder issue and an abdominal strain.

Putnam, 24, had a shot at competing for a spot in the Indians' bullpen during Spring Training. The right-hander spent the bulk of 2011 with Triple-A Columbus, where he went 6-3 with a 3.65 ERA in 44 outings. In 69 innings of work, Putnam struck out 68 and walked 23.

"In the end, we felt like we had some depth in the bullpen," Antonetti said. "In order to improve our rotation, it necessitated moving a guy like Zach. We're excited to have Kevin in the organization and excited to see him come into Spring Training to compete for a job."

Royal Rumble Rewind: 2000

2012-01-21T01:59:00.000-05:00

Entering into a new decade and century, the WWF rolled along. Despite Steve Austin being on the shelf at the time, the WWF continued to pump out entertaining shows and this one is no exception, thanks in part to a raccous New York crowd.

2000 Royal Rumble

Emanating from Madison Square Garden in New York City, NY

D’Lo Brown and Grandmaster Sexay have drawn #1 and #2 respectively. A pretty boring opening two if you ask me. Sexay dances, so D’Lo attacks him. Good move. D’Lo goes to powerbomb Sexay, but in a scary looking spot, Sexay reverses it into a hurricanrana. We don’t need another Droz incident, thank you very much. Sexay tosses D’Lo, but he hangs on. Mosh comes out at #3. Soon after, Kaientai, who were snubbed from the Rumble, come out and try to attack the combatants. However, they’re quickly disposed of. Sexay sloppily bulldogs D’Lo, who lands right on Mosh’s leg. Mosh appears to have legitimately hurt his ankle. #4 is Christian, who is greeted by Mosh. Not a whole lot happening thus far. Rikishi is the #5 entrant and he receives a big pop. Rikishi comes in and quickly eliminates Mosh. Then Christian suffers a similar fate. D’Lo gives Rikishi a legdrop, but that is no sold and Rikishi gets up to give him the Rikishi Drop. He easily eliminates him after that. Just as Rikishi starts to go after Sexay, Scotty 2 Hotty comes out at #6. Instead of fighting, the three decide to dance. I find this moronic and stupid, but the crowd eats it up. After busting a move, Rikishi grabs both Sexay and Scotty and tosses both of them out. Well, that almost made up for the dancing. The unfortunate next entrant is Steve Blackman at #7. Blackman gets some brief offense before suffering a Rikishi Drop himself. Just like that, he’s gone too. I think we have our Diesel push right here. The competition gets bigger at #8 with Viscera. The two slug it out and then Viscera drops Rikishi with a belly-to-belly suplex. Rikishi comes back with three stiff kicks and then a shoulderblock to knock him out of the ring. The Bossman comes out at #9 and you just hear this audible groan from the crowd. The Bossman refuses to get into the ring, but Test comes out at #10 and attacks him. He sends him into the ring, where Rikishi beats him up.

#11 is the British Bulldog and he goes after everyone. We’re paired up now as Test and the Bossman duke it out and the Bulldog tries to eliminate Rikishi. At #12 Gangrel comes out, but that doesn’t matter, because right behind him are Kaientai. They try to interfere again, and once again they’re unceremoniously dumped. As Test and Gangrel battle in the corner, Rikishi gives them a butt splash. We see on a double feature that Taka Michinoku took a nasty face first bump when he was tossed out. Edge comes out at #13 and is almost eliminated by the Bulldog within his first 30 seconds in the ring. Then, in a shocker, who shows up at #14? Bob Backlund! Sweet! He gets in and is jumped by the Bossman and the Bulldog. All of a sudden, everyone teams up and dumps Rikishi from the ring. Crowd doesn’t like that one. A big pop for the #15 entrant, Chris Jericho. He makes an immediate impact by dropkicking Backlund out of the ring. Back to the campaign trail for Bob. Here comes one of the Rock’s biggest threats, Crash Holly at #16. The Bulldog and Edge grab Crash and try to eliminate him, but he crawls back in under the bottom rope. Chyna is the #17 entrant and she goes right after Jericho. Jericho backdrops her to the apron, but then she suplexes him out of the ring. As she gloats, the Bossman bumps her off the apron to quickly end her night. As Farooq comes out at #18, the Mean Street Posse, also snubbed from the match, come out and jump him. The Posse are thrown out, but so is Farooq. Not quite sure what’s going on there. #19 is Road Dogg and he goes after Test. The Bossman tosses Crash, but again he crawls back in under the bottom rope. As Al Snow comes in at #20, the Bulldog goes out at the hands of the Road Dogg. Everyone seems to be sluggish right now waiting for the next mass exodus.

Once again an entrance is overshadowed by extra participants. This time, it’s the #21 entrant, Val Venis, who is overshadowed by Funaki, who feebly tries to wreck havoc on the entrants. This gives Jerry Lawler another excuse to show the replay of Taka falling on his face. The #22 entrant is Prince Albert and nobody cares. Meanwhile, Snow and Val backdrop Edge out of the ring. For some reason, Road Dogg has grapevined himself to the bottom rope. Hardcore Holly is #23 and the ring is really starting to fill up now. Once again, Crash teeters on the brink of elimination. Finally, the crowd wakes up as The Rock comes out at #24. He goes right after the Bossman and eliminates him with ease. Sadly, Snow and Val stop The Rock from getting rid of anyone else for the time being. Our #25 entrant is Billy Gunn, who targets The Rock upon his entrance. The Rock DDTs Crash and then launches him out of the ring. This prompts Hardcore to come over and attack The Rock. The Big Show comes out at #26 and is immediately met by The Rock. These two have an issue after Show took offense with The Rock calling him a jabroni (*rolls eyes*). Show goes over by Test, who is on the apron, and boots him to the floor. Well, Test gets the longevity award for tonight. Now Show dumps Gangrel out of the ring. As Show continues his dominance, Bradshaw comes out at #27. Right behind him is the Mean Street Posse. Bradshaw fends them off, but then is tossed out himself by the Outlaws. Now the Acolytes and the Posse brawl down the aisle. We’re paired up again as it’s Val & Albert, Show & Road Dogg, Hardcore & Gunn, and The Rock & Snow. Through hellfire and brimstone, Kane is out at #28. He comes in and immediately throws out Val. Now he goes after Road Dogg, who is still clutching the bottom rope like a security blanket. Kane clotheslines Albert out of the ring, but no one notices because they’re all watching the Godfather come out with the hos at #29. One last time, our favorite Chinese (he’s Japanese!) guy, Funaki, comes out and one last time he’s thrown out of the ring. We close with a wimper rather than a bang as #30 is X-Pac.

We now begin to weed out the crap as Snow clotheslines Hardcore out of the ring. The Godfather charges at Show, but Show clotheslines him right out. Now The Rock eliminates Snow. Road Dogg finally gets up to, of all things, laugh at Snow and wouldn’t you know it, he gets dumped too…by Billy Gunn. Don’t understand that one. However, Gunn barely enjoys the moment before Kane clotheslines him to the floor. Our final four are now: The Rock, Big Show, Kane and X-Pac. The Outlaws drag Kane to the outside and attack him. As the officials try to stop them, The Rock tosses X-Pac out of the ring. Since no one saw that, X-Pac gets back into the ring. Kane and Show try to chokeslam each other to no avail. Kane is able to hit Show with an enziguri and then slam him. However, X-Pac comes over and hits Kane with a spinning heel kick that knocks him out of the ring. Then X-Pac gives the Bronco Buster to Show. Show quickly gets back up and press slams X-Pac to the floor. The Rock delivers a spinebuster to Show and then connects with the People’s Elbow. As The Rock tries to eliminate Show, he puts on the brakes and chokeslams The Rock. Show tries to dump The Rock, but The Rock hangs onto the top rope and propels Show to the floor. The Rock is 2000 Royal Rumble winner.

Postmatch: The Rock gets on the mic and says he’s going to Wrestlemania, but Show comes back out and attacks The Rock. We end the show with him telling The Rock that this isn’t over.

Bottom Line: There were a handful of fun moments here, but overall this is a middle of the road Rumble. Its main problem was a lack of suspense. The only two likely candidates were The Rock and Big Show and since Show was coming off an unsuccessful title run, it was pretty much The Rock’s to win. Since those were the two main candidates, I would have liked if they would have teased out the final minutes between them to add some more drama. Overall, an ok Rumble that was without a moment that has stood the test of time, unless you count Taka’s face splat. *** ¾

Slumming it

2012-01-21T01:29:00.000-05:00

Here's a pair of trailers for distinctively low-budget, independent films that somehow managed to rope in big name stars. Both show promise, but ultimately may be too odd to draw in large crowds.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1999

2012-01-20T02:00:00.000-05:00

Writer Vince Russo can be credited with a lot of successes during the 'Attitude Era' of professional wrestling, but booking a Royal Rumble match was not one of them. The 1999 match is a display of him at his finest or worst, depending on how you look at it.

1999 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Arrowhead Pond in Anaheim, CA

Austin and Vince McMahon are #1 and #2 respectively and this is the first time they’re officially meeting in a match. The bell rings and Austin immediately attacks Vince and stomps a mudhole in him. Austin teases throwing Vince out, but then opts to keep him in for more abuse. #3 comes out and it’s Golga. As Austin hits the Lou Thesz Press on Vince, Golga attacks him. Austin recovers and dumps Golga out. Vince, meanwhile, crawled under the bottom rope and left ringside. Austin goes and follows him through the crowd. As they leave the arena, Droz comes out at #4 and waits. Austin and Vince go into a women’s restroom and we see the entire Corporation are in there and they attack Austin. Two minutes pass and Edge is the #5 entrant. Both men try to eliminate the other with no success. Sparklers and all, Gillberg is out at #6. “Gillberg” chant begins throughout the arena. Gillberg poses in the ring and is immediately shoved out by Edge. Hilarious! Droz clotheslines Edge, as we see Austin knocked out on the bathroom floor. Edge misses a corner charge and Droz tries to get him out. #7 is Steve Blackman, who goes after Droz. That doesn’t matter though as we cut back to Austin being tended to by paramedics. #8 is Dan Severn, who I forgot was still around by this point. He comes in and jumps Blackman. Again, it doesn’t matter, as we rather show Austin being put into an ambulance. Out at #9 is Tiger Ali Singh and they barely acknowledge his entrance because they rather show Austin. The Blue Meanie is #10 as we have some real A-list talent in the ring right now. Everyone pairs off and it’s Meanie vs. Tiger, Edge vs. Droz, and Blackman vs. Severn. Meanie does his dance for everyone’s amusement.

The buzzer sounds for #11, but no one shows. Soon, we cut to the back and see Mabel, who just returned earlier tonight on Sunday Night HeAT, attack Mosh. Mabel comes out and I guess he’s taken over the #11 spot. Mabel comes in and immediately knocks out Severn and Blackman. Then he clotheslines Tiger out of the ring. Road Dogg comes out at #12 to finally wake up the crowd. Meanwhile, Mabel has eliminated the Meanie and Droz. Edge low blows Mabel and then goes after Road Dogg. Road Dogg ducks a charging Edge and backdrops him out of the ring. As Road Dogg and Mabel go at it, the lights go out and the Undertaker’s music begins. The lights come back on and Mideon and the Acolytes have taken Mabel out of the ring. Taker meets Mabel in the aisle and tells him something before the Ministry takes him away. Oooookay. Road Dogg, meanwhile, is left in the ring, waiting. Finally, we get entrant #13 and it’s Gangrel. It doesn’t take long before Road Dogg tosses him out. Once again, he’s left waiting. Kurrgan comes out at #14 and is able to take control. As Kurrgan works Road Dogg over in the corner, Al Snow enters at #15. Snow and Road Dogg try to eliminate Kurrgan, but soon Road Dogg sees an opportunity and just pushes Snow to the floor. #16 is Goldust and he goes after Road Dogg. Goldust tries for Shattered Dreams on Road Dogg, but Kurrgan stops him. Now Road Dogg tries to do Shattered Dreams on Goldust, but Kurrgan stops him as well. Out to a big pop is The Godfather at #17. As Kurrgan & Road Dogg and Goldust & The Godfather square off, the crowd chants “We want hos”. The buzzer sounds and the lights go out. Kane is the #18 entrant. He comes in and eliminates everyone in the ring. Crowd popping huge for Kane. Soon, a bunch of guys in white coats come out for him. He fends some off and chases after others. Unfortunately, the dummy walked over the top rope to do it and he’s eliminated. And now the fans are waiting for anyone. Ken Shamrock is #19 and he’s forced to wait. However, as he walks down to ringside, we see Mr. McMahon return and he joins the commentary team. Hobbling to ringside is Billy Gunn at #20 Badd Ass tries to press slam Shamrock, but can’t complete the move due to his injured ankle. Shamrock is tossed over, but he holds on.

As Test comes out at #21, we see outside the arena that the Ministry have thrown Mabel into a hearse. As that happens, an ambulance drives up to the arena and it’s being driven by Austin. Austin comes out to ringside as the buzzer sounds for #22, the Bossman. Austin chases Vince into the ring, but Shamrock stops Austin and Vince heads back to the announce table. Shamrock’s attack is fleeting as Austin eliminates him shortly thereafter. The Bossman goes after Austin, while Test and Badd Ass go at it. HHH comes out at #23 and goes right after Test. The Bossman tries to eliminate Austin, but HHH stops him; only to try and eliminate Austin himself. Entrant #24 is Val Venis and when he comes in, he’s greeted with a HHH clothesline. Badd Ass works over Austin in the corner, but Austin quickly recovers and heaves him out of the ring. #25 is X-Pac and he goes after Test. The pairings are now Austin/Val, Bossman/HHH, and X-Pac/Test. It’s Sexual baby. Sexual Chocolate, that is, and he’s #26. The Bossman and Henry work over Austin until miscommunication leads to Henry nailing the Bossman. Jeff Jarrett comes out at #27 and he attacks X-Pac. X-Pac and HHH team up to beat up Jarrett, but then X-Pac delivers a spinning heel kick to HHH. Every man for himself! Now X-Pac gives the Bossman the Bronco Buster. LOL moment of the night, as you can hear HHH say to Val, “If I throw you, can you hang on?” #28 is D’Lo Brown and he’s not alone. He’s accompanied by Jacqueline and Terri Runnels, who’s in a completely see-thru top. Test attacks Austin, but soon the Rattlesnake dumps him over. Now the Bossman heaves X-Pac out of the ring. Jarrett and the Bossman try to get Austin over, but are unsuccessful. Austin hits the Lou Thesz Press on Jarrett and then HHH throws him out. Just as Jarrett exits, his tag partner, Owen Hart enters at #29. Austin leaves the ring momentarily and dumps water on Vince. Making history at #30 is Chyna.

She immediately goes after Henry and within seconds eliminates him. However, Austin comes right behind and clotheslines her out. HHH and Austin go at it while Owen takes on D’Lo and the Bossman and Val square off. Val tries to go after Austin, so HHH throws him out of the ring. That gives Austin enough time to give HHH the Stunner and eliminate him. Four are left in the ring, but five are still able to win. Austin sidesteps a D’Lo dropkick and then works him over in the corner. Owen delivers an enziguri to Austin, but Austin comes back and eliminates him. We’re officially down to the Final Four of Austin, the Bossman, D’Lo and Mr. McMahon. As odd of a Final Four as you’ll ever see. The Bossman uppercuts Austin and D’Lo connects with the frog splash. However, the Bossman comes up behind D’Lo and throws him out. By this time, Austin is back up. He stuns the Bossman and clotheslines him out. Now Austin goes out to Vince and they brawl by the announce table. After fighting through the crowd, Austin brings Vince back to ringside and nails him with a chair. In the ring, Austin stands over Vince when Vince delivers a low blow. However, Austin recovers and hits Vince with a Stunner. Austin hits Vince with an elbow from the second rope. All of a sudden, The Rock comes down to ringside. The Rock gets on the apron and he tussles with Austin. As they fight, Vince comes from behind and dumps Austin out. Mr. McMahon is the winner of the Royal Rumble.

Postmatch: Austin and The Rock fight to the back, while Vince celebrates by downing a couple of cold ones with Shane and the Stooges.

Bottom Line: In case you didn’t figure it out, the operative word for this Rumble was waiting and there was plenty of it. There were just way too many dead spots in a match where there should be none. And speaking of waiting, we would have to wait longer until Austin was officially the #1 contender for Wrestlemania. The finish here was a swerve for the sake of swerves. Completely unnecessary. It’s really hard to have a bad Rumble, but they sure tried their best (or worst) here. * ½

U + Mii = love

2012-01-20T01:53:00.000-05:00

Last week's CES gave techies a closer look at Nintendo's new Wii U, which is set to be released later this year. There are still a lot of unknowns regarding this, but I think it's got a lot of potential and I can't wait for its arrival. Here's a report from IGN on their thoughts after getting a chance to play around with it.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1998

2012-01-20T00:23:00.001-05:00

When Stone Cold Steve Austin won the Rumble in 1997, it was a surprise to many. The same couldn't be said by '98 when Austin-mania was running wild and he was the closest thing to a lock when it comes to Rumble winners.

1998 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the San Jose Arena in San Jose, CA

#1 is Cactus Jack and he’s brought garbage cans with him. Interestingly enough, Cactus’ recent tag team partner Chainsaw Charlie (aka Terry Funk) is #2 and he has his chainsaw with him. We get a hardcore start to the Rumble as they use the weapons they brought plus chairs. Both men take some wicked chair shots to the head. Tom Brandi (the former Salvatore Sincere) is #3, but both guys in the ring gang up on him and eliminate him right away. Arrivederci! Now the hardcore legends go back to beating each other up. After suplexing Chainsaw onto two chairs, Cactus tries to dump him, but pulls him back in as #4, The Rock makes him way to the ring. The Rock briefly is able to divide and conquer until Cactus nails him with the garbage can. Cactus then puts the can on The Rock and he and Chainsaw play pinball with him. After Cactus knocks The Rock through the ropes, he celebrates, only to get a lowblow from Chainsaw. Mosh comes out at #5 and almost gets nailed with a chair that was thrown out of the ring by Chainsaw. We’ve now separated into Cactus/The Rock and Chainsaw/Mosh. Chainsaw goes for a moonsault, but doesn’t quite hit it. #6 is Phinneas and you can hear the energy just leave the crowd upon his entry. Cactus tries to suplex Mosh out of the ring, but can’t get him up. 8-Ball is out next at #7 and you wonder why they just didn’t have him come out one number later. Cactus charges at Chainsaw, but Chainsaw ducks and Cactus eliminates himself. A disappointingly early night for Mick Foley. Or is it?? The Rock comes close to eliminating Chainsaw, but he holds on. Blackjack Bradshaw is #8, as the streak of suck continues. Everyone is just wandering around doing nothing interesting at all. #9 is Owen Hart, who comes out to a big pop. However, before he can get into the ring, Jeff Jarrett and Jim Cornette come out and put a severe beatdown on him. It now appears that Owen won’t compete in the Rumble match. Or will he? Steve Blackman is #10 and he comes in and almost knocks Chainsaw out with his karate kicks. Phinneas is almost eliminated by Blackman, but The Rock makes the save.

Nation member #2 and entrant #11 is D’Lo Brown. Our pairings now are Blackman/The Rock, Phinneas/Mosh, Chainsaw/8-Ball and Bradshaw/D’Lo. Unfortunately, no one is close to being eliminated. Stables apparently mean nothing as The Rock and D’Lo begin to go at it. #12 is Kurrgan, who immediately goes into no-selling mode. Mosh tries mounting Kurrgan in the corner, but Kurrgan dumps him out. Out to a big pop is #13 Marc Mero. Oh sorry, that pop was for Sable. The ring is filled with a lot of worthless talent right now. Kurrgan helps the problem by tossing out Blackman. Ken Shamrock comes out at #14 and goes right after Kurrgan. Soon, everyone joins him and they collectively dump Kurrgan out. The Rock hits the People’s Elbow on Chainsaw with little fanfare. #15 is Thrasher as I continue to wait for someone decent to arrive. The crowd must agree as they resigned themselves to a “Sable” chant. We get our first surprise of the night as Mick Foley is back as Mankind at #16. He goes right after Chainsaw and eliminates him to return the favor from earlier tonight. The Rock and Shamrock resume their fight in one of the corners. #17 is The Artist Formerly Known as Goldust, who’s in a new outfit that now includes bra and panties. Mero takes a breather to do some shadow boxing. Let’s hope it pays off. Goldust and Mankind tangle in the corner and Goldust manages to get him over the top rope and to the floor. Making his second (sort of) appearance tonight is Jeff Jarrett at #18. Owen Hart runs out shortly after Jarrett, gets into the ring, and immediately attacks him. Jarrett manages to throw Owen over, but he skins the cat and then eliminates Jarrett on the other side of the ring. Huge pop for that. Our second surprise comes in the form of the Honky Tonk Man, who is #19. Coming down with him is HHH (on crutches from an injury I don’t recall) and Chyna. The Rock continues to do well as he dumps Shamrock to the floor. Owen spots HHH at ringside and gives him an unkind gesture. This prompts HHH to crack him with his crutch as Chyna yanks him out. Geez, everyone’s picking on Owen tonight. Owen chases HHH to the back and trips at the entrance way. Hope he didn’t injure himself there. Speaking of injuries, it’s Mr. Glass himself, Ahmed Johnson at #20. Ahmed gingerly climbs into the ring as J.R. tries convincing us that he’s back to 100%.

Here comes Mark Henry, who is entrant #21 and Nation member #3. J.R. now begins to sound like Tobias Funke when describing Henry attacking Ahmed by saying he’s “handling the big Johnson”. This ring is getting majorly bloated right now as the crowd is getting restless. Henry throws powder in Ahmed’s face, for some reason, but it doesn’t lead to an elimination. The buzzer sounds and #22 is…is…nobody. Lawler is convinced that someone got to Austin and this was supposed to be his number. Now D’Lo and Henry team up to toss out Ahmed. Then, Henry ducks a punch by Phinneas and heaves him out. Ahmed and Phinneas brawl to the back, much to my bewilderment. #23 is our fourth Nation member, Kama Mustafa. I would say strength in numbers, but these guys have been beating each other up as much as they have their opponents. Sure enough, there goes Kama and D’Lo duking it out. CRASH! Here comes Stone Cold out at #24. Everyone in the ring stops and looks toward the aisle, but Austin enters through the crowd and blindsides Mero. He quickly dispatches of him. Now everyone realizes he’s in the ring and they try ganging up on him. Austin fights out of it and tosses out 8-Ball. Things settle back down, as Austin chokes D’Lo with his vest. Running out at #25 is Henry Godwinn, who goes right for Austin. #26 is evidently all of Los Boricuas. Actually, it’s just Savio, but his three stablemates join him in the ring to attack Austin. Austin manages to fend all of them off. The fifth and final Nation member, Farooq is entrant #27. He comes in and goes right after The Rock. All is not well amongst the black caucus. Now Austin and The Rock are brawling on the floor, however neither is eliminated. Pulling a three-peat, Mick Foley is back out again, this time as Dude Love at #28. He makes an immediate impact by knocking out Bradshaw, who was trying to eliminate Henry Godwinn at the time. As things wind down, Chainz strolls out as #29. D’Lo is whipped into Farooq, who backdrops him out of the ring. We remain in punch and kick mode, despite there only being one entrant left. That entrant comes out and it’s none other than Vader. He first attacks Goldust, but then takes a moment to eliminate Honky. Let the mass exodus begin! Austin dumps Thrasher and Kama in rapid succession. Shortly after that, Austin knocks out Savio, while Goldust clotheslines Vader out of the ring. Dude Love ducks a charging Henry Godwinn, who eliminates himself. Chainz grabs Goldust and heaves him out of the ring. Austin backdrops a charging Chainz to get rid of him. Farooq manages to get Henry over the top rope, but he hangs onto the apron. However, as Henry tries to get back into the ring, Farooq knocks him to the floor. Isn’t it amazing how all those guys held strong for so long and then just like that, they were all eliminated in a matter of seconds.

All joking aside, we’re now left with a Final Four of Farooq, The Rock, Dude Love and Austin. Former tag champs vs. current faction members. Dude takes on Farooq, while Austin and The Rock go at it. Now they switch and Dude hits Sweet Shin Music and a double-arm DDT on The Rock. Austin shows why he is the Texas Rattlesnake by then attacking Dude. Dude comes back, however with the Mandible Claw. Austin breaks it by going low. That allows Farooq to then clothesline Dude out of the ring. Farooq goes after Austin and The Rock decides to let him do all of the work. As Farooq gets close to eliminating Austin, The Rock comes up and dumps Farooq. We’re down to two and they begin to slug it out. Austin tosses The Rock over, but he hangs onto the apron. The Rock comes back in, only to receive a Stunner for his troubles. Austin takes the woozy Nation member and eliminates him for good to win his second Rumble in as many years.

Bottom Line: This Rumble was bookended nicely with a pair of entertaining segments. However, the middle was just dreadful. Way too many guys stayed in well past their welcome and it was tough to make the match compelling. As I said before the match, they only told one story leading up to the match and as a result, it took a lot of drama away from the Rumble. There were a few nice surprises, but a lack of star power really hurt this one. ***

"Carmona" throws a curveball

2012-01-20T00:00:00.000-05:00

From SI.com:

From year to year and game to game, the Cleveland Indians never knew what to expect from Fausto Carmona.

On Thursday, he stunned them again.

Carmona, the Indians' opening-day starter last season, was arrested in the Dominican Republic for allegedly using a false identity. Officials in his native country are contesting his real name and birthdate.

Police spokesman Maximo Baez Aybar said Carmona was arrested in Santo Domingo outside the U.S. consulate, where he had gone to renew his visa. Carmona had played winter ball in the Dominican as he prepared to report to the Indians' training camp in Goodyear, Ariz., next month.

At this point, his future with the club is uncertain.

Aybar said Carmona's real name is apparently Roberto Hernandez Heredia and he's 31, three years older than the pitcher claimed. The Indians list Carmona's birthday as Dec. 7, 1983, in their 2011 media guide.

"We were recently made aware of the situation that occurred today in the Dominican Republic and are currently in the process of gathering information," Indians general manager Chris Antonetti said. "We are not prepared to make any additional comment at this time."

Carmona's agent said he was caught off-guard by the arrest and that there are Dominican lawyers working on the player's behalf. He did not disclose the names of the lawyers.

"This took us by complete surprise," agent Jay Alou said. "What we have to do now is wait to find out the process that has to be done with the consulate with this new identity in order to see if he can get a new work visa."

Carmona's arrest is the second involving a major leaguer in four months in a false identity case. Miami Marlins reliever Leo Nunez was arrested in September. Last month, an apologetic Nunez said he falsified his identify when he was young so he could play professional baseball. Nunez's real name is Juan Carlos Oviedo and he's 29, a year older than listed in the Marlins' media guide.

Carmona's career in Cleveland has been one of extremes.

After going 1-10 in 2006, the right-hander with a wicked slider came out of nowhere to win 19 games in 2007, shocking the Indians who had briefly experimented with him as a closer. Carmona, though, followed up with a disappointing 2008 season, and in 2009 the club sent him to the lower minors to work on his mechanics.

Carmona rebounded to win 13 games in 2010 in manager Manny Acta's first season. Although he went just 7-15 last season, Carmona stayed healthy, didn't miss a start and was expected to be part of the starting rotation this season. The Indians picked up his $7 million option for 2012 in October.

The Indians signed Carmona to a four-year contract in 2008. The club has options on him for 2013 at $9 million and 2014 at $12 million.

Cleveland signed Carmona as a free agent in 2000.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1997

2012-01-19T02:07:00.000-05:00

While he obviously had bigger or more historic moments in his career, it could be argued that Stone Cold Steve Austin's dubious win at this year's Rumble was key in turning him into the superstar that he became.

1997 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Alamodome in San Antonio, TX

Crush has drawn #1 and shockingly Ahmed Johnson is #2. Who would have thought that two men who are at odds with each other would draw the first two numbers? Crush hammers away on Ahmed in the corner, but Ahmed comes right back with a clothesline. Ahmed already appears to be blown up as Crush tries to get him out of the ring. With no countdown or buzzer, “Razor Ramon” comes down at #3. Ahmed meets Razor as soon as he gets in the ring and moments later tosses him out. Ahmed then dumps Crush, but Crush hangs on and brings himself back in. All of a sudden, Ahmed hops over the top rope and eliminates himself. We soon see it was because Farooq came down the aisle. Ahmed chases him to the back and Crush is left alone in the ring. That doesn’t last long as Phinneas Godwinn comes out at #4 (still no countdown). Phinneas immediately tries dumping Crush, but Crush wraps himself around the ropes. As the two slug it out, the glass breaks, which means it’s Stone Cold Steve Austin at #5. Crush holds Phinneas for Austin, but Austin misses and hits Crush instead. Austin then shrugs his shoulders as if to say “Eh, who cares”. Nice! That error, however, allows Phinneas to toss out Crush. As Phinneas celebrates, Austin comes up, stunners him and then harshly heaves him to the floor. Bart Gunn is #6 and tries to gain a quick upper hand on Austin with a Rocker dropper. As Gunn charges at Austin, Austin sidesteps him and clotheslines him out. Austin is making light work of everyone so far, so he does some push-ups while he waits for the next guy. He then hops up into the corner and checks his pretend watch. His wait is finally over as Jake “the Snake” Roberts strolls out at #7. A nice wink back to their King of the Ring final. Jake actually hits the short-arm clothesline, but when he goes for the DDT, Austin backdrops him to the floor. Austin then whips Roberts’ snake bag at him. The PETA people won’t like that, but then again it’s not like Austin refused to feed the snake like Jake did. During Jake’s elimination, the buzzer rang and now we get entrant #8, the British Bulldog, who’s BIZARRE. The Bulldog and Austin have been at odds with each other recently. The Bulldog goes right after Austin and kicks away at him. #9 is Pierroth, who fails to illicit any reaction from the crowd. Pierroth begins to fight with the Bulldog, giving Austin a breather. The Sultan is #10 and he goes after Pierroth when he gets into the ring. Meanwhile, the Bulldog almost gets Austin out.

#11 is Mil Mascaras and these time periods seem to be getting shorter than 90 seconds. Can somebody tell me what the deal is with Mascaras? First, he wears these tights that make him look like he’s wearing a diaper. Then, there’s his legs. Are they detachable? There is such an indentation between where his legs connect to his torso that he looks like an action figure. Maybe he wears a mask all the time to take notice away from the lower half of his body. Anyway, he comes in and goes after the Sultan. HHH is entrant #12 and we do not have one clear-cut babyface in there currently, which is really strange. Everyone pairs as it’s the Bulldog and the Sultan, Mascaras and HHH and Austin and Pierroth. The Bulldog clotheslines the Sultan, and as he staggers to get up, the Bulldog clotheslines him again, but this time it’s to the floor. Austin grabs HHH and tosses him over, but HHH is able to hang on. Pierroth and Mascaras go at it as Owen Hart comes out at #13. Owen and the Bulldog take turns attacking Austin. As the Bulldog tries to eliminate Austin, Owen comes up and dumps the Bulldog out. The Bulldog is furious and Owen pleads innocent. Everything is not well in the land of the tag champs. #14 is Goldust, who is jumped by Austin as soon as he hits the ring. We now have Owen vs. Mascaras, Austin vs. Goldust and HHH vs. Pierroth. #15 is Cibernetico. OK, enough with the AAA guys. We don’t care! Goldust tosses HHH over and again HHH hangs on. Marc Mero comes out at #16 as Pierroth eliminates Cibernetico. Then, Pierroth gets dumped out by Mascaras. Mascaras then stupidly goes up top and jumps into Cibernetico and Pierroth, thus eliminating himself. Well, that took care of the Mexican contingency real quick. Goldust and Mero work together and eliminate HHH thus giving Goldust some retribution for his loss earlier. Just when we think the AAA guys are gone, Latin Lover comes out at #17. Goldust dodges a dropkick by the Latin Lover, but moves right into a clothesline by Owen, which sends him to the floor. Farooq comes in at #18 and makes an immediate impact by backdropping the Latin Lover out of the ring. That’s all Farooq will do because soon after, Ahmed comes out with a big board and chases Farooq out of the ring. Then as the referees try to regain control, Austin dumps both Owen and Mero out, leaving him by himself. In another nice nod to Austin’s past, it is Savio Vega, who comes out at #19. The two brawl until Vega gets the upper hand with a slingshot and spinning heel kick. Austin comes back, however, by hitting Vega with a hot shot and then clotheslining him to the floor. As Austin waves on the next guy, we see it’s Double J Jesse James at #20. He tries his luck, but Austin quickly dispenses of him as well.

Now Austin perches himself in the corner again eagerly anticipating the next entrant. The buzzer sounds and lo and behold it’s Bret Hart, the man he’s currently feuding with. The two go at it and Bret gets the better of the exchange. Bret locks Austin in the Sharpshooter as the buzzer sounds. #22 is none other than Jerry Lawler, who stops mid-sentence, gets up from the announce table and hops into the ring. As soon as he hopped in, Bret comes over and punches him right back out of the ring. Lawler dusts himself off, goes back over to the announce table and finishes his sentence. Classic Rumble moment. Bret continues to dominate Austin as “Diesel” enters at #23. Diesel attacks Bret allowing Austin to rest. Now Austin is able to go back on the attack as he throws Bret chest-first into the corner. Terry Funk is out at #24. He goes after Austin as Bret and Diesel duke it out. As Funk hits a weak piledriver on Bret, Rocky Maivia comes out at #25. Naturally, he goes after Austin because those two are like magnets, only we didn’t know that yet at this point. Mankind strolls out at #26 and just like Rocky naturally went after Austin, he goes after Funk. Some big star-power in the ring right now. Bret locks Austin in a sleeper, but Austin quickly jawjacks him. Flash Funk is your #27 entrant and J.R. quickly notes he’s not related to Terry. Thanks J.R. He comes in and goes up top where he then launches himself onto Diesel and Funk. The buzzer sounds and clearly it’s time for Vader to be #28. Everyone is kinda milling around now, preparing for the end game. #29 is Henry Godwinn and I question why he didn’t come out with the rest of the mid-card during the first half of the Rumble. There are some near eliminations but no one is gone just yet. We now get entrant #30, who is the Undertaker and he’s got a prime spot.

He comes in and goes right after Vader to avenge his loss earlier tonight. Now Taker goes after everyone, including his own brother, err…I mean, Diesel. Flash charges at Vader, who catches him and then tosses him over his head and to the floor. Impressive bump there. Taker whips Henry over, but he manages to hang on. However, a few moments later Taker and Henry tangle again and this time he is able to eliminate him. Bret comes close to eliminating Austin. Rocky comes off the ropes, but Mankind catches him in the Mandible Claw and forces him over the top rope and to the floor. Mankind and Funk begin to brawl and Mankind clotheslines both of them over the top rope, but not to the floor. Before Mankind can recover though, Taker boots him to the floor. Mankind and Funk begin to brawl on the floor. Bret grabs Austin from behind and finally eliminates him. That means your Final Four are: Bret Hart, Diesel, Undertaker and Vader. But wait a second…Austin sneaks back into the ring because the referees did not see him hit the floor as they were all occupied with Mankind and Funk. Austin goes behind Vader and Taker and dumps them both. He then sneaks behind Bret, who had just tossed out Diesel, and eliminates him as well. The bell rings and Austin is declared the winner.

Postmatch: Furious, Bret loses it and beats up the referee. He then goes outside, grabs Vince and begins to yell at him. What a sore loser!

Bottom Line: This Rumble is tough to rate. It started off real slow. Part of the problem was a dead crowd and the other half was nothing interesting going on. However, once Bret hit the ring things really picked up. There was a lot of star power in there, which made it difficult to figure out who was going to win it and then they provided a very creative, yet controversial finish. For me, this is one of my favorite Rumbles as there were some great moments (Austin’s antics, Lawler’s cameo) and a satisfying finish as I loved seeing Bret’s world come crashing down on him. Not the best Rumble, but definitely an improvement over the past couple. *** ¼

RBR: A Good Old Fashioned Orgy

2012-01-19T01:03:00.000-05:00

This film was quietly released in theaters last fall and given the rather raunchy subject matter never got much of an audience despite boasting a cast of talented comedians like Jason Sudekis, Nick Kroll, Martin Starr, and Will Forte. The premise is that Sudekis is your typical man-child who loves throwing extravagant parties at his father's beach house. When his dad decides to sell the place, Sudekis decides that the final blowout will be an orgy with his friends. While the film does eventually get to the titular sex romp, the film really sags in the middle leading up to the event. There's not a lot going on other than some feeble attempts at character development in order to set up the key moments at the party. I will give the film credit though for actually following through on its promise, even if it doesn't turn out exactly as they had planned. The film works well enough thanks in large part to its funny leads. I especially liked the limited appearance of Will Forte and Lucy Punch who play a married couple who feel excluded from the rest of the gang's activities. Ultimately though this feels like a film that was sold based on its title alone and the writers really had nothing beyond that climatic scene. There are enough laughs here to make it worth a rental, but I certainly hope these actors, particularly Sudekis, are not stuck doing these B-level sex comedies for the rest of their careers. They're too gifted to be wasted in one-note films like these. Rating: ***

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1996

2012-01-19T00:15:00.002-05:00

While the winner of the '96 Rumble may seem familiar, it was clear that the early seeds were being sown for a sea change in the WWF as many future stars make this first appearance in this match/

1996 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Selland Arena in Fresno, CA

HHH is #1 after losing, via DQ, to Duke “the Dumpster” Drosse during the first ever Free For All. And at #2 is the surprise of all surprises Henry O’ Godwinn, who is just coming off a feud with HHH. HHH and Godwinn slug it out until Godwinn knocks him down with a clothesline. Godwinn whips HHH to the corner where he flips and flops, but doesn’t fall out. HHH is pressed over Godwinn’s head, but he escapes before getting thrown out. #3 is Mr. Bob Backlund, who comes in and stops Godwinn from eliminating HHH. Everybody takes their shots at each other with no alliances showing. Jerry Lawler is #4 and he grabs Godwinn’s slop bucket. As HHH and Backlund hold Godwinn, Lawler gets ready to slop him. However, Godwinn escapes and grabs his bucket back as the heels flee to the floor. With their backs turned, Godwinn pours the bucket’s contents on all three of them. Order is finally restored and Bob Holly enters at #5. HHH throws Godwinn over, but he hangs on and rolls back in. #6 is Mabel and he goes right after Godwinn. Lawler joins his fellow king against Godwinn while HHH and Holly square off. Jake “the Snake” Roberts slithers out at #7 and immediately releases his snake into the ring. Then Jake grabs Lawler and lays the snake on him, causing Lawler to crawl out of the ring. Still no one has been eliminated as Dory Funk Jr. hobbles down at #8. Jake goes for a DDT on HHH but he blocks it. As no one does anything interesting, we see Lawler is hiding underneath the ring. #9 is Yokozuna and if the ring wasn’t filled enough already, it certainly is now. Yoko makes an immediate impact by eliminating Backlund. Mabel and Yoko go at it and Mabel splashes Yoko in the corner with Godwinn behind both of them. Oomph! At #10 is the Kid who’s looking behind him all the way down to the ring with good reason as Razor soon chases after him. The Usual Bunch of Idiots escort Razor back before he can get to the Kid. While all that happened, Jake dumped Godwinn out.

#11 is Asian sensation, Ohmari who gets Aja Kong’s music, or is it Tenryu and Kitao’s? Perhaps, it’s the Orient Express’ music. I can’t tell. More nothingness happens as #12 Savio Vega comes out. After receiving a spinning heel kick from Savio, Mabel is dumped out by Yoko. Jake and Ohmari spill over the top rope but only Ohmari falls to the floor. #13 is Vader, who is accompanied by Jim Cornette. Vader chooses his first target to be Holly. Good choice. From the apron, Savio backdrops Funk to the floor. The buzzer sounds and we get another “who?” participant. This time it’s Doug Gilbert at #14. Jake DDTs Savio to a nice pop. In the most ludicrous spot of the night, Jake gets hit by Vader in the middle of the ring and then stumbles all the way to the side and over the top rope. Squat Team member #1 comes out at #15 as fans begin to wonder if this is the Royal Rumble or an indy show battle royal. Vader now begins to dominate as he press slams Gilbert to the floor and then launches Squat Team member #1 over the top rope. Yoko and Vader begin to brawl much to Cornette’s dismay. As Squat Team member #1 heads out, the buzzer sounds and out comes Squat Team member #2 as #16. What a co-inky-dink! They both decide to go to the ring only to both be eliminated by Vader and Yoko respectively. #17 is Owen Hart and he also decides to start off by attacking Holly. Vader and Yoko are now working together to beat up Savio. #18 is Shawn Michaels and our Clique count is up to 3. As Shawn attacks HHH, Vader clotheslines Savio out of the ring. Yoko and Vader start going at it again, which allows Shawn to come up from behind and eliminate both of them. Yeah riiight! Then just for kicks, Shawn press slams the Kid to the floor also. Hakushi comes out at #19 as Vader and Yoko continue to brawl on the floor. Vader comes back in the ring and press slams Shawn to the floor. He then clears the ring of everyone, forcing a bunch of referees and interim president Gorilla Monsoon to come out and force Vader to leave the ring. All the people Vader just “eliminated” come back in and out comes #20 Tatanka. What rock did they find him under? HHH knocks Shawn over, but he hangs on. Meanwhile, Hakushi isn’t as lucky as Owen dumps him to the floor.

Jacques Strap, err, I mean Aldo Montoya is out at #21. By the way, why the hell is Bob Holly still in this Rumble? He should have been eliminated with the rest of the riff raff minutes ago. Shawn, now on the floor, grabs Lawler and brings him back into the ring. As Shawn officially eliminates Lawler and Tatanka clotheslines Aldo out, Diesel strolls out at #22. Diesel comes in and immediately eliminates Tatanka. Diesel then actually knocks Shawn down. #23 is Kama, who comes out to zero reaction. Ouch, I mean, even Doug Gilbert got some reaction. We’ve now paired off as it’s Diesel and Kama, HHH and Owen, and Shawn and Holly. A fresh-faced young man that goes by Steve Austin, but is now called The Ringmaster comes out at #24. I wonder if he’ll ever amount to anything. As Mr. Perfect sings Austin’s praises, Austin beats up on Holly. Holly flips Austin over, but he hangs on and sneaks up and eliminates Holly on the other side. Finally! That elimination actually got some cheers, which proves there are still some sane people in California. Barry Horowitz is #25 and still can’t catch a break as he’s immediately grabbed by Diesel upon entry. As everyone seems to be standing around, Diesel wakes everyone up by quickly tossing HHH to the floor. Lasting until #25 was still a very good showing by HHH. Fatu is #26, but somehow I don’t think he’ll “make a difference” in this match. Owen tries to suplex Shawn out, but he blocks it. As #27 Issac Yankem gets in the ring, Owen backdrops Horowitz out of the ring. Owen then goes over and hits Shawn with the enziguri, the move that put Shawn on the shelf last November. As Owen goes to throw Shawn’s limp body out, Diesel comes from behind and tosses Owen to the floor. Marty Janetty is #28 and we’re back to punching and kicking. Shawn and Marty start to brawl which means these two have taken over for Martel and Santana as the ex-tag partners guaranteed to go at it in the Rumble. Kama gets Fatu over but not to the floor. #29 is the British Bulldog, who gets a nice draw for a guy coming off being the #1 contender at last month’s In Your House. Making an impact already, the Bulldog backdrops Janetty to the floor. While the Bulldog and Shawn fight, we see in the background Fatu clothesline Austin out of the ring. Geez, first this and then attempted vehicular homicide. Man, Fatu’s really got it out for this guy. Fatu can’t celebrate for too long as Yankem comes up and clotheslines him out. Thanks to the Free For All match, Duke Drosse is your #30 entrant.

He goes right after Yankem, as the Bulldog and Shawn, neither eliminated, brawl on the floor. Out of nowhere, Owen comes back and helps the Bulldog attack Shawn. Back inside, Shawn is pressed by the Bulldog, but Diesel stops him from tossing Shawn out. Shawn now gets the strength to dropkick Yankem and eliminate him. Diesel and Kama team up and get rid of Duke. That makes our Final Four: Shawn Michaels (naturally), the Bulldog (perfectly acceptable), Diesel (makes sense) and Kama (huh?). The Bulldog dumps Shawn over, but he slips back in and clotheslines the Bulldog to the floor. Meanwhile, Diesel piefaces Kama to the floor, only to turn around and receive Sweet Chin Music, which sends him up and over to the floor.

Postmatch: Diesel teases turning on Shawn, only to offer him a high five.

Bottom Line: A completely blah Rumble as the winner was pretty well known before the event. The crowd wasn’t really into it as there were too many entrants that they weren’t familiar with or had stopped caring about a long time ago. Still there were some interesting stories told here (HHH’s longevity, Vader’s dominance, HBK’s survival against all odds) that helped matters. Plus, there was an interesting look to the future as this marked the first time such people like HHH and HBK or Austin and Rikishi faced off. This wasn’t a bad Rumble, it just wasn’t a very memorable one. **

World domination

2012-01-18T13:08:00.000-05:00

It seems like just yesterday that Sophie was winning Survivor: South Pacific and yet here we are again with the announcement for the cast of Survivor: One World. Below is a pic of the new tribemates.

But along with these new contestants come several new changes and twists to the game itself. Here are the highlights:

-As was announced at the end of last season, while there will be two tribes, everyone will be living at the same camp. Contestants will have to decide how much they want to co-mingle with members of the other tribe

-The tribes will be seperated by sexes again this year

-Redemption Island is gone (thank heaven!). This means more reward challenges and once your torch is snuffed, you're done.

-Two hidden immunity idols will be in play, but the twist this time is that if you find one, you have to give it to someone on the other tribe. This could make for some very interesting new strategies and alliances.

-There will be a handful of host-less challenges this season where the tribes will be giving instruction and supplies and left to run the challenge themselves. That will either be really interesting or an unmitigated disaster.

-Finally, some of the notable castaways this season include Survivor's first little person, a gay Republican, and two guys who have a fascination with Tarzan.

For more details on the individual cast members and what's in store for the upcoming season, you can read about on EW.com Survivor: One World begins February 15th.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1995

2012-01-18T01:45:00.000-05:00

More experimenting took place in 1995 as they decided to have the entrants come out every 60 seconds instead of 2 minutes. On one hand when you have a roster as poor as this one is, you can't blame them for trying to get it over with as quickly as possible, but in general this move was a bad idea and never tried again.

1995 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Sun Dome in Tampa, FL

Rumble match has 1-minute intervals this year instead of two. Vince claims that with 1-minute intervals, this will be the most fast-paced and action-filled Rumble ever. In reality, substitute fast-paced and action-filled with lame and crappy. Shawn Michaels is #1. British Bulldog is #2. Nothing wrong with these two starting out. Too bad they only get a minute instead of 2 to go at it alone. Bulldog gets a quick press slam on Shawn, but doesn’t throw him out. Where’s Heenan to call him a dumb limey? Shawn is whipped to the corner where he nearly flips out. #3 is Eli Blu, who would later be known as one of the Harris Brothers. No matter who he is, he sucks big time. Nothing happens before it’s time for #4 who is Duke “the Dumpster” Droese. Shawn goes after Droese, while Blu and the Bulldog tussle. Jimmy Del Ray is #5 and people are coming out way too quick. How can you tell any story here? Del Ray puts Shawn on the brink of elimination. #6 is Seone (the former Barbarian), who goes right after Shawn. The Bulldog clotheslines Del Ray to the floor to make him victim #1 tonight. In a cruel twist of irony, Tom Pritchard enters at #7 as his partner just left. Seone now press slams Shawn, but fails to put him out also. Stupid Samoan! Vince makes a stupid statement saying Duke Droese has the equal intellect of Shawn. And I laugh. Doink and Dink come out at #8 and I’m disappointed that it’s Doink who’s entered and not Dink. More nothingness as #9 KWANG makes his way down. Sidenote: Kwang is the sound of one hand clapping. Ever since Shawn and the Bulldog, we’ve had some real dud talent come out. Everyone battles it out, while Shawn takes a rest. #10 is Rick Martel and I eagerly anticipate Tito Santana to come out at any moment.

Owen Hart is #11, but he gets attacked by Bret before he gets to the ring. Officials send Bret back quickly though. #12 is Timothy Well, who receives a big pop. Oh wait, the pop was because Owen has already been eliminated by the Bulldog. Shawn backdrops Duke out and he lands on a referee. That begins spring-cleaning as Well, Martel, Pritchard and Doink all get tossed. As #13 Luke comes out, Eli Blu and Seone eliminate each other. Shawn makes quick work of Luke (big surprise there) and we’re down to the original two. They don’t do much before #14 Jacob Blu comes out. Blu initially handles both Shawn and the Bulldog, but soon Shawn dumps him as well. Bulldog gets Shawn over but not out. King Kong Bundy waddles out at #15. Shawn foolishly tries to eliminate Bundy instead of helping him dump the Bulldog. #16 is Mo and he is immediately and I do mean immediately eliminated by Bundy. Hands down, there is your big-time loser of the night. Bulldog tries to slam Bundy but that ends badly for Davey Boy. Mabel is #17 and somehow I think he’ll last just a big longer than Mo. Mabel and Bundy pair off for FOX’s new reality show, When Cellulite Collides. As #18 Butch enters, Mabel has already gotten Bundy out. That’s a bit surprising if you ask me. After Shawn eliminates Butch in normal Bushwacker fashion, Mabel and the Bulldog team up to try and get rid of him. Lex Luger comes out at #19 and makes an impact by immediately eliminating Mabel. #20 is the biggest turd known to the world, Mantaur. He goes right after Lex Luger.

More Wrestlecrap follows at #21 with the Portuguese Man O’War, Aldo Montoya. He tries to eliminate Shawn, but somehow I doubt he’ll be the one. Meanwhile, Luger and the Bulldog double-team Mantaur. #22 is Henry O. Godwinn, who attacks everyone upon entering the ring. Shawn is able to take another breather while others pair off. Billy Gunn runs down at #23 and blows up before hitting the ring. Luger cocks his arm ready to punch the Bulldog, until he sees who his target is. C’mon Luger, whatever happened to “every man for himself”? Following his partner’s lead, Bart Gunn comes out at #24. Bob Backlund at #25 enters to a chorus of boos. Bret again comes out and attacks Backlund before he can get into the ring. As Backlund finally makes it into the ring, Luger is right there and clotheslines him out. Meanwhile, Steven Dunn enters at #26. With Backlund eliminated, he and Bret go back at it and brawl to the back. As if this Rumble hasn’t been filled with a bunch of jokes already, I get the biggest laugh with #27 Dick Murdoch. He looks like a poor man’s Dusty Rhodes and moves about as well as him too. #28 is Adam Bomb and this ring is getting really clogged now. With Shawn once again close to elimination, Fatu comes out at #29. Fatu and Billy Gunn slug it out. Luger flushes the toiliet by eliminating Mantaur. Lucky #30 is Crush, who gets in the ring and dumps the Smoking Gunns, who were fighting each other. See Luger, they know it’s every man for himself.

Steven Dunn is tossed by Aldo, which must be really embarrassing. Shawn is so tired he needs the ropes to hold him up. Vince says to Lawler that he doubts two men will ever win the Rumble again, which is his subtle way for admitting that last year’s Rumble booking decision wasn’t the best. Murdoch tries his luck at dumping Shawn, but fails as well. Fatu gets tossed over the rope and Murdoch tries to get him off the apron with a headbutt. What an idiot! The headbutt doesn’t work on Samoans and Murdoch is left with a sore head. Bomb charges at Crush but he backdrops him out. Shawn gets tired of looking at the bright yellow jock strap and eliminates Aldo. Fatu does a 360-degree sell for a Crush clothesline. Then he gets tossed by Crush. After giving Godwinn an airplane spin, Murdoch tries to dump him but his momentum carries him out while Godwinn hangs on. Luger is able to backdrop and eliminate a charging HOG. That means our Final Four is Luger, Crush and the first 2 entrants, Shawn Michaels and the British Bulldog. Shawn and Crush double-team Luger, while the Bulldog takes a breather. Luger climbs on Crush in the corner, but Shawn comes over and knocks him out. Crush and Shawn initially strike a friendship, but Crush double-crosses Shawn. Crush gets Shawn up in a press slam, but Shawn rakes his face and escapes. With Crush temporarily blinded, the Bulldog is able to clothesline him out. It’s now come full circle as the first two, are now the last two. Bulldog gets Shawn in yet another press slam, but only crotches Shawn on the top rope. A fatigued Shawn gets back in the ring only to be clotheslined out and over by the Bulldog. A jubilant Bulldog celebrates in the corner when Shawn comes back in and knocks Bulldog to the floor. The bell rings and the referees say Shawn is the winner. As the replay shows, only one of Shawn’s feet touched the floor. This was an amazing feat of strength, as Shawn was really close to having both feet touch. Cool ending!

Bottom Line: The 1-minute intervals really hurt the Rumble match here. No one was given ample time to do anything in there besides Shawn and the Bulldog. Plus it features a real Who’s Who in Wrestlecrap History lineup of entrants. One of the worst Rumbles, but the ending really prevents it from getting a worse rating. **

License to be rude

2012-01-18T01:40:00.000-05:00

As a Bond fan, I should find this to be blasphemous, but I can't help laughing at this parody of the Bond theme which points out that 007 isn't always the nicest guy. Watch and enjoy, but WARNING, it does contain some NSFW language.

His Name Is James Bond - watch more funny videos

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1994

2012-01-18T00:55:00.001-05:00

Now that the Rumble match was several years old, the WWF decided to start getting cute with the finish to the match. As you'll see here, it didn't exactly work out as well as they would have liked.

1994 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Providence Civic Center in Providence, RI

#1 is Scott Steiner. #2 is Samu. Oh goodie, tag team wrestlers! Because we all know that they’ve got a real good shot of winning. Vince says that due to time restraints, intervals will be 90 seconds, not 2 minutes. Scott and Samu do nothing of great interest before the countdown to #3 happens. Fans count down to #3 thanks to the CASIO clock. For all your clock and calculator needs, think CASIO. Rick Steiner is #3. Well at least they’re getting rid of the tag teams early on. Steiner Brothers go to work on Samu, natch. Samu goes charging after the Steiners but they sidestep him and Samu gets his head caught in the ropes. OUCH! Scott releasese him and shoves him to the floor. #4 is Kwang. Interesting note… Kwang’s mother was a huge fan of the ‘60s Batman show. Her other sons’ names were Boff! Zapp! and Kapow! As Kwang enters the ring, he mists Rick. Scott and Kwang fight it out while Rick struggles to see. Coming in at #5 is “boooo” Owen Hart. Big time heel heat for him. Owen disposes of Rick pretty quickly and then goes over to help Kwang. Bart Gunn is next at #6. Bart and Owen pair off, as do Scott and Kwang. Strolling out at #7 is Diesel. Diesel decides to go with the “punch everyone once” method upon entering the ring. Soon, he sticks with Bart and then eliminates him shortly thereafter. Before Bart can get to his feet, Diesel has eliminated Scott as well. Owen doesn’t fare any better as he gets tossed too. Kwang goes for a spinning heel kick but misses. As he gets up, Diesel clotheslines him out of the ring. Four guys eliminated by Diesel in under 2 minutes. Fans are eating this up. #8 is Bob Backlund who last year broke the longevity record at the Rumble. Here, Diesel eliminates him in under a minute. A tale of two Rumbles for Backlund. Trying his luck at #9 is Billy Gunn. Billy gets booted and tossed out too. Later cowboy. While Diesel waits for the next entrant, we cut to the back where we see Kabuki and Tenyru attacking Lex Luger. Replacing Kamala at #10 is Virgil. Just like in his love life, Virgil gets dumped quickly here too. Diesel has now notched seven victims and counting.

#11 is Macho Man and I have a feeling he won’t go as quickly. Macho goes to town on Diesel, delivering lefts and rights. A couple of elimination attempts by Macho fail. Diesel receives some help from #12 Jeff Jarrett. Jarrett is able to toss Macho over, but he hangs on to the ropes. Coming back inside, Macho knees Jarrett in the back and then pitches him to the floor. Things don’t get any better for Macho though as Crush, the man he’s been feuding with, comes out at #13. Macho immediately goes after Crush and gets the better of him. Before long though, Crush and Diesel team up to attack Macho. As #14 Doink makes his way to the ring, Crush dumps Macho to the floor. While Diesel and Crush fight, Doink just stands back and laughs. Soon the heels stop their fighting and turn their attention to Doink. At #15 is Bam Bam Bigelow who certainly wants a piece of Doink. Diesel and Crush step aside as Bam Bam grabs Doink and press slams him to the floor. That’s no laughing matter for Doink. Diesel and Crush then try to immediately eliminate Bam Bam but can’t do it. Mabel is #16 and he’s one guy that could actually handle going against three guys. Diesel is waiting for Mabel and goes to work on him as soon as he hits the ring. Man these two could have one heck of a main event someday. Mabel gives each heel an avalanche in separate corners. Vroom Vroom! It’s Sparky Plugg (Bob Holly) replacing the 1-2-3 Kid at #17. Plugg goes after Crush but Bam Bam nails him from behind. #18 is Shawn Michaels. Diesel looks to want to fight Shawn but then shakes his hand. While Shawn and Diesel have their lovefest, Crush and Bam Bam come up and attack Diesel. Soon all the wrestlers gang up and eliminate Diesel. Right at the end, Shawn comes up to join the group. A last minute save attempt or an aid in the elimination? You make the call! Fans give Diesel a nice ovation as he leaves. As well they should. His performance is still remembered to this day. At #19 is Mo who gets less than half the pop Mabel received. Shawn is put on the brink of elimination by Plugg while Men on a Mission take it to Bam Bam.

The buzzer sounds for #20 and it’s Greg “the Hammer” Valentine. I’m surprised he didn’t bring his mask and enter the Rumble as Mr. Ugly. As the ring fills up, nothing exceptional is going on. Coming out for his second match of the night is Tatanka at #21. He goes right after Shawn and pounds away on him. Everyone seems to be milling around waiting for the next evacuation sequence. Kabuki is #22 and I doubt that he will clear a lot of guys out of the ring. The wrestlers gang up, shove Mo out of the way and eliminate Mabel. Lex Luger is running to the ring at #23 so I guess that lockerroom attack wasn’t so bad after all. Luger makes an immediate impact by eliminating his attacker Kabuki. Crush slows down Luger with a reverse atomic drop. #24 is Tenyru and Vince fears that he will team up with Kabuki and Crush to go after Luger. Too bad Luger just eliminated Kabuki not a minute ago. Look like Vince needs a SONY instant replay camera to go with his CASIO countdown clock. Shawn is once again teetering on the verge of elimination but manages to hold on. Buzzzzz! It’s time for #25 but no one pops out. It is assumed that it was supposed to be Bret Hart who couldn’t come out due to his earlier leg injury. Life goes on as perennial Rumble participant Rick Martel comes out as #26. Too bad Tito isn’t there or else they could renew their rivalry again. Now we have ten guys in there who are all punching and kicking and doing nothing to excite the fans. Two friends, Luger and Tatanka, start going at it but the crowd doesn’t seem to care. #27 is Bret Hart, who hobbles out to an awesome ovation from the fans. As he enters, Crush immediately approaches him and goes after his knee. Afa drags Fatu out at #28 and the ring now has twelve guys. This is way too much right now. Luger hoists Crush over the top rope and eventually gets help from Bam Bam, Plugg, and Bret to eliminate him. But just as we lose Crush, we gain Marty Jannetty at #29. A slugfest instantly starts between Jannetty and Shawn, which electrifies the crowd. Adam Bomb then rounds out the field at “lucky” #30.

So with no one left to come out, we still have nearly half the entrants left in the ring (13). Bret and Shawn eliminate Plugg and that’s the only time you’ll ever see those two work together. Vince delivers the sad news that the #25 no-show was Bastion Booger because he ate too much. Sadly, that’s what he said and not some poor attempt on my part to be funny. Still more punching and kicking as I wonder why they bothered cutting the intervals down to 1 ½ minutes if they were going to have them go this long after #30. Finally the exodus begins as extra fluff like Valentine, Martel, Bomb, and Mo get tossed. As Bam Bam gets eliminated by Luger, Shawn disposes of Janetty proving that he was the superior Rocker. Funny spot as Tenyru gives Fatu and Shawn a double noggin knocker; Shawn sells it, Fatu doesn’t it. I love small touches like that. Luger completes his retribution by eliminating Tenyru. That leaves us with a Final Four consisting of Bret, Shawn, Luger and Fatu. All four men take a corner, but soon the heels go after the faces. Pairing off is Shawn/Bret and Luger/Fatu. Shawn and Fatu manage to get Luger on the apron but no further. Fatu does the 360 sell after Luger hits him with the loaded forearm. The faces simultaneously eliminate Fatu and Shawn. Bret and Luger slug it out for a few seconds before going near the ropes and falling out together. A collective “huh?” is said among the crowd. Referee Earl Hebner believes Bret has won while Joey Marella says Luger is the winner. It takes Jack Tunney to come out and decide that both men won. Wow, way to fence ride Jack! It should be noted that when Luger was announced as the winner, it was a mix of cheers and boos. On the other hand, it was an overwhelming ovation for Bret when his name was called. Take a hint Vince!

Bottom Line: The star power was certainly better this year thanks to them making the decision that guys who fought earlier in the night could also be in the Rumble match. On the other hand, they kept way too much unnecessary talent in there for way too long. There is no reason that guys like Martel, Plugg, Valentine, Kabuki, and Tenyru should have been in there for more than five minutes. The ending was a nice new twist. Too bad both winners didn’t elicit the fan response that Vince would have liked to seen. *** ½

PAC-man

2012-01-18T00:35:00.000-05:00

It would take too long to go into all the details and developments that have gone down involving Stephen Colbert and his Super PAC (Political Action Committee). However, his latest move may be the best yet. Colbert is trying to get on the ballot for the Republican South Carolina primary, however because he missed the deadline, South Carolina won't let him. So now his Super PAC (which is now being run by Jon Stewart - who's TOTALLY not coordinating with him) has begun to run ads encouraging South Carolina voters to vote for Herman Cain, who is on the ballot despite the fact that he dropped out of the race last month. This whole thing has really put a light onto what a sham the whole campaign process can be. And while thinking about it can make you sad, Colbert and co. have sure found a way to make it hilarious as well. Anyways, here's the ad that's now running.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1993

2012-01-17T01:39:00.000-05:00

This year marked the first time in the Rumble history that the winner would receive a title match at Wrestlemania, a stipulation that has stuck with the match ever since.

1993 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Arco Arena in Sacremento, CA

Ric Flair is #1 and Heenan doesn’t seem as worried this year. He figures that since he won it at #3 last year, what’s a mere two more spots. I concur. Bob Backlund is #2 and you can hear the snickering throughout the crowd. Or maybe it’s just me. The ironic thing is that sold Backlund as this ‘old timer’ and yet Flair is the same age as him. These two spend the opening minutes proving that while Backlund may have the upper hand, Flair will always have more class. Heenan notes that a Bret Hart/Bob Backlund match would be something. Little did he know that those two would fight for the WWF Title nearly two years later. Papa Shango is #3. He gives Flair a breather and beats up Backlund. Flair says thank you by tossing Shango out when he was trying to eliminate Backlund. Flair then almost eliminates Backlund, but he hangs on to the bottom rope. Ted Dibiase is #4 as his string of lousy draws continues. Dibiase and Flair join up and attack Backlund. Backlund manages to survive another 2 minutes and gets some help from Brian Knobbs who is #5. He goes after both heels. Knobbs gives Dibiase the Pit Stop and to my knowledge that is the only PPV Pit Stop, strangely enough. Virgil is #6 and goes after Dibiase. Does he know how to fight anyone else? Knobbs charges at Dibiase, Dibiase ducks and Knobbs eliminates himself. Making his WWF PPV debut is Jerry “the King” Lawler at #7. Him and Flair go at it in the corner while Backlund and Virgil take it to Dibiase. Lawler unloads a flurry of punches on Flair, prompting Flair to crawl under the bottom rope and take a breather. Max Moon is #8. BWHAHAHA! I can’t believe any self-respecting man would wear a costume like that. It looks like someone vomited cotton candy all over him. Flair dumps Moon over the top rope but Moon skins the cat and comes back in. Everyone is just kinda milling around in there doing nothing of note. Moon gives Lawler a spinning heel kick in the corner. He goes for a second one but this time Lawler dumps him to the floor. #9 is Tenyru and I say whoop di doo. Hey, I’m a poet and I didn’t even know it. Tenyru and Flair get into a chopfest, which ends with a Flair Flop. Mr. Perfect is #10 to inject some interest back into this match. Mr. Perfect goes after Flair, natch, and gets the better of him. Monsoon announces during their brawl that they will fight each other the next night on Monday Night RAW in a Loser Leaves Town match. I’m guessing neither man is winning the Rumble then.

#11 is Skinner but most people don’t care, as they are too busy watching Flair and Perfect. Shortly after Skinner enters, Perfect clotheslines Flair out of the ring. Boy is Heenan irate! Koko is #12 and as he runs down to ringside he pulls up his Hammer pants like he’s Steve Urkel. Now there are a couple of people you want to emulate. Perfect tosses Skinner over the top rope but he hoists himself back in. As he does that, Perfect dropkicks him to the floor. Despite Skinner’s elimination, the jobber to superstar ratio is still way too high right now. Things don’t get better as Samu comes out at #13. Let’s see, anything interesting going on? Well the guy in the fourth row just spilled his beer but other than that, nothing really. Oh god, Berzerker is #14 and I’m praying that the top rope just breaks now immediately eliminating everyone in there. Perfect eliminates Lawler with a back body drop to draw a mild pop from the crowd. Dibiase comes up from behind Perfect and tosses him over. Perfect tries to hang on for dear life but the combination of Dibiase kicking and an already eliminated Lawler tugging on him is too much for him to overcome. Great, now there is no one of interest in there. (No offense, Virg) Undertaker is #15 and there was much rejoicing. Taker enters and it’s bye bye Samu and sayonara Tenyru. While Taker was cleaning house, Berzerker took Backlund through the middle ropes and attacked him with a chair on the outside. Cock-a-doodle-do Terry Taylor is #16. Taylor begins brawling with Koko and Dibiase comes up and eliminates both of them. Looks like the Rooster gets the Bushwacker Butch award for brevity this year. As Dibiase gloats about getting rid of them, Taker chokeslams him and then clotheslines him out of the ring. As the Undertaker deals with the Berzerker, IT waddles to ringside. That “IT” is the near 8 ft. tall Giant Gonzalez (unnamed at this point) led by Harvey Whippleman. As Gonzales enters the ring, Taker eliminates the Berzerker. #17 is Damian Demento but 99% of the audience doesn’t know it as they can’t take their eyes of this Giant. Gonzales finally begins to pummel the Undertaker after a long staredown and knocks him to the floor. So by WWF logic, that means Undertaker is eliminated. Ugh. IRS comes down as #18 but the focus remains on Gonzales and Taker. These new entrants won’t even get into the ring. Finally, the Usual Bunch of Idiots gets rid of Gonzales while Taker is left for dead. (Pardon my pun) This now leaves us with Demento, IRS and Backlund, who was still knocked out from the Berzerker attack. Tatanka is #19 and he helps out Backlund against Demento and IRS. Meanwhile, Paul Bearer comes down to revive and recover the Undertaker.

#20 is Jerry Sags and I see we’ve gone back to filling the ring with crap. Sags goes after IRS while Tatanka and Backlund try to eliminate Demento. Typhoon is #21 and the vomit begins to rise in my throat. Heenan accidentally refers to Typhoon as Tugboat. Now if only Heenan would have referred to Terry Taylor as the Red Rooster, my night would have been made. Afa drags down Fatu at #22. Who in their right mind honestly believes a member of a tag team will EVER win a Rumble? We have 4 people from tag teams in there right now if that says anything. Make that 5 as Earthquake waltzes down at #23. He goes right after Typhoon. (Huh?) Well at least we’re not forced to watch them beat up on separate guys. Typhoon charges at Quake and Quake heaves him to the floor. I have no idea why they had them do that. They never feuded after this to my knowledge. #24 is Carlos Colon, who is referred by Monsoon as a youngster despite the fact that he looks over 40. For those of you who don’t know Colon, you’re not missing anything. Tatanka tosses Demento over the top rope but he hangs on. Colon then back body drops Demento out of the ring for good. Well, I’m glad to see they are letting people who are here for one-time deals eliminate people as oppose to the young up-and-comers who are in the middle of undefeated streaks. El Matador is #25. A charging Fatu gets eliminated by Backlund. He’s been in the Rumble for over 40 minutes and he finally gets his first elimination. Rick Martel is #26 and he goes after Santana. Geez, and I thought the Virgil/Dibiase feud was bad. These two go all the way back to ’88. 1888, that is. Quake ducks as IRS charges prompting IRS to eliminate himself. Santana almost eliminates Backlund but he crawls in under the bottom rope to the delight of the fans. I don’t blame them. Who else do they have to cheer for right now? Yokozuna finally makes his way down at #27 to almost no reaction. Here comes the mass evacuation again…later Tatanka, adios Carlos, so long Earthquake. Owen Hart came out at #28 amidst Yoko’s spring-cleaning. Joining the jobber parade is Repo Man at #29. All of the jobbers wise up and collectively try and dump Yoko but they can’t get it done. And that my friends is why they’ll always remain jobbers. Our final entrant is Macho Man who’s put at this spot so it isn’t so painfully obvious who is going to win here.

With all 30 men now out, we thankfully head to the finish in a hurry. Santana, Sags, Owen and Repo are all evacuated pretty quickly. In Owen’s case, he was evacuated quickly and nastily. He landed poorly on his knee that put him on the shelf for a while, if I recall correctly. That leaves us with a Final Four of Macho Man, Yokozuna, Rick Martel and Bob Backlund. Man, if Dibiase is cursed with early draws, then the reverse is true for Martel who always seems to be there at the end. Yoko is choking out Macho while Martel tries to get rid of Backlund. Backlund perches Martel up in the corner and then punches him to the floor. Backlund gets brave and tries to attack Yoko. After a failed dropkick attempt, Backlund foolishly charges Yoko and gets eliminated by the big sumo. Backlund managed to survive long enough though to break Ric Flair’s record and become the new longevity champion at 1 hour and 3 mins. Although, it was later stated that he was actually only in for 61 minutes. Still an impressive feat. Meanwhile, back in the ring, Macho makes a futile attempt to eliminate Yoko. He actually knocks Yoko down and then tries to cover him. What a moron! Yoko heaves Macho off completely over the top rope to win the #1 contendership at Wrestlemania.

Bottom Line: With a third of the Rumble comprised of tag team wrestlers and over another third made up of jobbers, this was a weak field that left little doubt as to who was going to win it. This Rumble had most guys just punching and walking, which is never exciting. Then when you add in the Giant Gonzales mess, it makes for a bad Rumble. The Backlund story was interesting and Perfect and Flair had their moments but it wasn’t enough to save this dog. * ½

Happy Birthday Betty!

2012-01-17T01:31:00.001-05:00

America's favorite, Betty White celebrates her 90th birthday today. To honor this funny lady, I've posted a few videos below that highlight just some of the reasons as to why she's so awesome.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1992

2012-01-17T00:27:00.002-05:00

With the WWF Championship vacant at the time, this year's Rumble gained a level of importance as the winner was going home with the title.

1992 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Knickerbocker Arena in Albany, NY

The backstory for this Rumble is that the title was vacated by Jack Tunney, after he saw the dubious way Hogan won the title from the Undertaker, back at This Tuesday in Texas. Tunney comes out before the match to announce this is for the title and wishes the participants the best of luck. There were numerous boos heard during Tunney’s speech. To think, they could have wasted Vince’s evil owner angle years earlier with Tunney as the evil president. Bulldog is #1. Million Dollar Man is #2. Man, he is still paying for supposedly buying #30 in 1989. Bulldog starts off hot, but soon enough Dibiase takes Bulldog to school. Dibiase dumps Bulldog over but Davey Boy stays on the apron. He comes back in and clotheslines a gloating Dibiase to the floor. No title for Teddy. And now here comes Flair at #3. Bobby does not like this draw at all. Gorilla mentions that no one drawing #1 – 5 have won the Rumble. That’s funny since we’ve now had numbers 1, 2, 3, and 5 all win it. Bulldog manhandles Flair for the next 2 minutes. Jerry Sags is #4. Sags and Flair double-team the Bulldog. Bulldog comes back with a double clothesline. Davey Boy tosses Sags over, but he hangs on. As he brags on the apron, the Bulldog dropkicks him to the floor. Now it’s back to Bulldog and Flair. Haku (subbing for Brian Knobbs) is #5. Haku and Flair start to beat up on the Bulldog but soon Haku turns on the Nature Boy. As the countdown begins, Bulldog casually dumps Haku out. #6 is Shawn Michaels, who receives a not so warm welcome after recently putting Marty Jannetty through the Barber Shop window. Michaels comes in and takes it to Flair. He even gets Sweet Chin Music on him, except not to the same effect it would have later on in his career. The Bulldog clotheslines Shawn over the top but he hangs on. I love how so many people are hanging on as it shows how much they want to win. El Matador is #7 and he goes right after Ric. Flair gets nailed with a Santana flying forearm. #8 is Barbarian. Flair and Barbarian attack the Bulldog, while Shawn and Tito duke it out. Texas Tornado strolls out at #9 and does his usual aimless punching to everyone. Pairing off are Flair and the Tornado, Santana and the Barbarian and the Bulldog and Michaels. Repo Man marks the third-way point at #10. He stalks around the ring for a few seconds before entering. Everyone is making the rounds trying to meet…er…attack each other.

Greg Valentine is #11 and immediately trades chops with Flair. Ring is filling up with some fluff now. However, the bickering between Heenan and Monsoon is easily keeping this entertaining. Shawn is hanging on the apron again. #12 is Nikolai Volkof, who is subbing for Marty Janetty. At this point, if Volkof won the title, he could probably get a loaf of bread and two buttons for it in Mother Russia. Heenan is going crazy again as Valentine has slapped the figure four on Flair. Repo Man just backdropped Nikolai to the floor, so scratch my previous statement. Big Boss Man comes in at #13 and punches away on everyone. Repo Man tosses out Valentine. Who would have guessed Repo would eliminate 2 guys in less than 2 minutes? But before Repo can do anymore damage, Big Boss Man grabs and heaves him to the floor. Out of nowhere, Flair musters enough strength to hoist Bulldog up and out. And just like that, Flair also sends Texas Tornado to the floor. Bye Bye Kerry! Flair is getting his second wind. #14 Hercules comes out as Michaels and Santana eliminate each other. Barbarian tries to eliminate Flair but Hercules comes up and dumps the Barbarian. Boss Man follows that up by clotheslining Hercules out. We’re down to Flair and the Boss Man. It’s all Boss Man until he tries a charge. Flair moves out of the way and the Boss Man ends up launching himself over the rope and to the floor. No one can believe it, as the Nature Boy is left alone in the ring. Flair can barely rest, when #15 is the new Intercontinental champ Roddy Piper. If you recall, Piper and Flair have had issues before this too. Piper dominates Flair; including giving him an airplane spin and sleeper. Jake Roberts is #16 and just sits in the corner to allow Piper and Flair to fight. That doesn’t last long as soon Roberts jumps Piper. What a snake! Flair puts a figure four on Jake and Roddy comes over to stomp on both of them. The buzzer sounds, but it might as well be a groan because it’s Hacksaw. He’s #17. The faces and heels square off now. #18 is IRS, who takes his time heading to the ring. IRS and Duggan brawl, while Flair and Jake try to eliminate Piper. Gorilla announces that it has been 36 minutes for Flair so far. Ol’ Coconut Head Jimmy Snuka is #19. Flair teeters on the brink of elimination a couple of times. The Undertaker strolls out at #20. It should be noted that the Undertaker and Hogan were given “special treatment” because of their involvement with the title match at Tuesday in Texas. This meant they would get to draw between #20 – 30 only. As you can see, Taker didn’t even get that great of a number. Regardless, he walks into the ring and with one shot eliminates Snuka. Man, Taker loves to beat the crap out of Superfly. Taker then begins to choke out Ric. Is that anyway to say thanks to the man who helped you win your first title?

Macho Man is #21 and immediately runs after Jake. Taker catches Macho before he can get to him though. Finally, Savage gets to Roberts and goes to town on him. It doesn’t take long before Macho kneedrops Jake out. Macho then makes a major faux pas by going up to the top rope and jumping out and onto Jake. The announcers try their best to cover it up, but we all know he f*cked up. Right now, the pairs are Macho and Flair, Duggan and Taker, and Piper and IRS. Berzerker husses his way out at #22. Flair tries suplexing Macho Man from the apron, but Savage reverses it and brings Flair back in. Virgil is #23 and sadly no one cares. Nothing of note happens as they are slowly getting ready for the big finish. #24 is Col. Mustafa who Monsoon calls “dangerous”. Oooh, I’m trembling! Monsoon then catches a bout of J.R.itis by calling Ric Flair, Rick Martel. Speaking of Martel, he comes out now at #25. Duggan decides he’s tired, so he mugs for the crowd and tries getting a U.S.A. chant started. The fans don’t want to chant U.S.A., you dolt! They are too interested in watching the real wrestlers actually fight! Hulk Hogan is #26. Of course he got a good number. Hogan gets trapped in a corner by Taker, Berzerker and IRS. Hulk comes firing back and clotheslines both Taker and the Berzerker out of the ring. Fans are going nuts as Heenan is sweating bullets. Hacksaw and Virgil eliminate each other. So long to dead weight. Skinner, chaw and all, comes out at #27. I have to laugh as Martel sells a Piper headscissors, as if someone is using a taser on him. #28 is Sgt. Slaughter. The announcers mention that he’s a former WWF champ as if that actually means he is a candidate to win here. Rick Martel dumps out Skinner. At this point, it is announced that Flair has the new longevity record beating the previous record set the year prior by Martel. Great pop for Sid Justice who is #29. Flair and Hulk duke it out. The Warlord gets lucky #30. One of these guys is getting the strap. Hogan and Flair brawl on the floor but aren’t eliminated. Sid whips Slaughter so hard into the corner that he falls all the way to the floor. Piper eliminates IRS via his own necktie. Hogan and Sid team up to get rid of the Warlord. As Piper and Martel brawl, Sid walks up and pushes both of them out.

Your Final Four are: Hulk Hogan, Sid Justice, Ric Flair and Macho Man. A decent quartet any way you look at it, as all four are still viable candidates to win. Savage is eliminated by Sid and Flair. Hulk knocks Flair onto the apron and tries to kick him off. Sid comes from behind and tosses out Hulk, much to the glee of a number of fans. Hulk, furious over Sid’s actions, grabs Sid’s arm and begins to tug. OUR HERO! Flair gives enough of an assist to eliminate Sid and become the NEW WWF CHAMPION. Wooo! Heenan is beyond jubilant and immediately leaves the booth to congratulate the new champ.

Postmatch, the suits have to come out and prevent Sid and Hulk from going at it. In a sign that things were changing, the crowd was largely behind Sid during their standoff.

Backstage Jack Tunney presents Flair with the WWF title. Flair then delivers an emotional promo and gets his moment in the sun. In the middle of it all, Mean Gene has to reprimand someone for lighting a cigarette. I’m sure Gene was just cranky because his buddy Hogan didn’t win.

Bottom Line: What a truly great Rumble. Not only for Flair’s marathon performance, but also for all the mini angles that were played up throughout the match. (Flair-Piper, Savage-Roberts, Hulk-Sid) This will perhaps be the best Rumble ever. *****

Bond-ing together

2012-01-16T13:52:00.000-05:00

My wish has come true! For the first time ever, all 6 men who have portrayed James Bond will be in the same room together as part of the 50th anniversary of the iconic spy franchise. Here's more details on the event from msn.com

Six actors who have played James Bond over the years are set to unite at a party to celebrate 007's 50th anniversary in Hollywood.

The superspy from Ian Fleming's books first hit screens in 1962 movie "Dr. No" with Sean Connery in the lead role, and the other stars to officially play the iconic character in the franchise are Roger Moore, George Lazenby, Timothy Dalton, Pierce Brosnan and current Bond Daniel Craig.

The actors will be brought together this year for a massive celebration to mark 50 years since the release of first movie, according to Britain's Sunday Express.

The event will take place following the premiere of the latest 007 film, "Skyfall," in October and will also include many of the actresses who have played Bond girls over the years, including Ursula Andress and Eva Green.

A statement from the MGM movie studio reveals the party will be the climax of a "whole year of birthday celebrations for 007 in the movies", while Daniel Craig says, "It's an astonishing record for any character to endure for five decades in showbiz but I'll bet this: the franchise is such a phenomenon that in another 50 years time a whole new bunch of actors and their leading ladies will be gathering for another party when Bond becomes a centenarian."

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1991

2012-01-16T02:16:00.000-05:00

1991 saw us in the middle of the first Gulf War and the booking of that year's Rumble match certainly reflected that.

1991 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Miami Arena in Miami, FL

Bret Hart is #1, as those signs of a singles career seem to keep popping up. Dino Bravo is #2. Gorilla seems to think Bravo is a cheapskate. Maybe that’s what got him shot gangland style. Bret starts off hot, but Dino soon takes control. Greg Valentine is #3. Valentine nails Dino to the shock of Jimmy Hart. Valentine quickly disposes of Dino. Valentine tries to go after Jimmy Hart but he escapes. Bret, who had been resting, goes right to work on Valentine. Paul Roma is #4. Valentine and Roma gang up on Bret but then Roma turns on The Hammer. Texas Tornado is #5. Tornado gives his usual crappy punches to everyone. Valentine gives us a Flair flop. It’s now Valentine and the Tornado and Bret and Roma paired up. Roma with a near Bob Holly-like dropkick on Von Erich. Rick Martel is #6. He goes immediately after the Hitman. Bret puts Martel on the brink of elimination. #7 is Saba Simba and thankfully Piper doesn’t shout, “it’s Tony Atlas!” this time. Pairings now are Saba and Roma, Hart and Valentine, and Tornado and Martel. The Model comes close to being dumped again but no dice. Sidenote: Shane McMahon is one of the floor referees. Tornado puts the dreaded palmhold on Paul Roma. Butch is #8. He whacks his way around the ring for 10 seconds before someone realizes how idiotic he looks and hits him. Saba Simba and Martel go flying over the top rope. Simba falls to the floor, but Martel hangs on. Not 30 seconds later, Gorilla asks Piper, “I don’t see Saba Simba, where did he go?” How Piper didn’t laugh in his face for such an idiotic question baffles me to this day. Jake the Snake is #9 and right away goes after Martel since they were in the middle of their feud. Jake goes for the DDT but Martel bails under the bottom rope. Hercules is #10. Ring is filling up fast. Everyone is now casually punching each other with no real direction. Valentine and Jake try to eliminate Bret but he pantomimes to the camera that he’s bored with their efforts. What a dick!

#11 is Tito Santana. Roma tries for a high crossbody on Jake but misses and launches himself over the top rope. Tito immediately goes after Martel as always. Undertaker is #12 and now we can hopefully clean out some deadweight. Just as I say that, Taker casually dumps Bret Hart out. As much as I don’t care for the Hitman, he wasn’t who I had in mind when I said deadweight. Superfly Jimmy Snuka is #13. Major afro on Snuka tonight. Taker launches Butch out. That’s more like it. Despite Undertaker’s efforts, the ring is still pretty crowded right now. Jake goes back to trying to eliminate Martel. British Bulldog is #14. Only thing of note going on now is some drunk in a green shirt who keeps walking past the front row. Smash is #15. From the apron, the Model is able to eliminate Roberts. #16 is Hawk. Hawk tries to punch everyone so everyone gangs up on Hawk in return. No complaints here. Newcomer Shane Douglas is #16. Undertaker heaves Tornado over the top rope. Vaya con dios Kerry! Hawk follows that up by eliminating the Superfly. #18 is…is…is…no one! It was revealed later though to be Macho Man’s number but he “left the building to avoid the Warrior.” Funny moment though as when the buzzer rings you see Animal start come out an then quickly hide behind the curtain. I can just hear someone backstage screaming at him, “No, no you moron! Not yet!” It’s time for #19 and whoa, what a surprise, it’s Animal. Legion of Doom work on the Undertaker and clothesline him out. Martel sneaks up behind Hawk and dumps him right after. Crush is #20. The Demos work over the British Bulldog.

Hacksaw Jim Duggan is #21 and I’m immediately board. (rimshot please) It’s getting pretty obvious at this point that everyone is sticking around in the ring in hopes of being tossed out by His Holiness. (coughHogancough) #22 is Earthquake. He quickly disposes of Animal. More chit-chat goes on between the wrestlers. Mr. Perfect is #23 and finally I’m interested. Perfect does his bumping for Duggan of all people. It’s all good though as Perfect soon dumps that idiot. Thanks Curt! Hogan is #24. Yippee! Victim #1 for the Hulkster is Smash. See ya Brother! Haku is #25. Now Hogan dumps Valentine after a 37-minute performance for the Hammer. It’s only now that Hogan finally gets his shirt off. #26 is Jim Neidhart. Earthquake eliminates Tito nonchalantly. Luke is #27. In a classic Rumble moment, Luke walks in and Quake just as quickly tosses him out the other side. Luke, we hardly knew ye. Nasty Boy Brian Knobbs is #28. Everyone gangs up on him as if he poses some threat. Knobbs pitches Hercules who was out there longer than he had any right to be. Warlord is #29. Hogan dumps Crush, or as my roommate calls him, “that bondage guy”. Hogan clotheslines Warlord out of there. That marks two different times (89 and 91) that Hogan has eliminated the Warlord via a clothesline in less than 2 minutes from the Rumble. Tugboat is #30. I promise no Shockmaster jokes.

He goes after Earthquake. Knobbs knocks out Shane Douglas. Tugboat goes after his “friend” the Hulkster. I guess this was the precursor to his ‘shocking’ heel turn. (OK, so I lied) Angered, Hulk comes back and dumps Tugboat. Bulldog dropkicks Perfect out. That’s a shame! Martel eliminates the Anvil. Haku gets tossed out by the Bulldog. Martel goes up top but Bulldog catches him and throws him out. Finally, after 53 minutes, Martel was gone. As a young fan watching this back in ‘91, I was sooo glad when he finally was eliminated because he was so close so many times during the night. Final Four is British Bulldog, Hulk Hogan, Earthquake and Brian Knobbs. Why in God’s green Earth was Knobbs booked to go this late into the Rumble? I think “Hogan Knows Best” gave us the answer to that one. The heels team up and dump the Bulldog out. Poor Davey Boy, always a bridesmaid, never a bride. Quake and Knobbs then work over Hulk which includes the big butt splash. Hogan of course pops up and boots Knobbs out. Hogan gets some offense before a slam attempt backfires on him. Quakes squashes Hogan some more before Hulk pops up again. 2 pop-ups in one match? They must really want to send the fans home happy. It’s all a formality after that as Hogan gets his obligatory slam on Quake before clotheslining him out of the ring.

Bottom Line: Well star power was non-existent in this Rumble. Too many times there was a bunch of guys standing around doing nothing. Even though the notion of Hogan winning back-to-back Rumbles nauseated me, it was the right thing to do, given the Slaughter win. Had he not won the previous year, this would have been more tolerable. ** ¾

Harry Squatter

2012-01-16T01:31:00.002-05:00

In case you missed it, here's a funny Harry Potter skit from last night's Saturday Night Live hosted by the boy wizard himself, Daniel Radcliffe. This is probably a more realistic look at what happened in the future of the Potterverse.

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1990

2012-01-16T01:03:00.000-05:00

We begin the nineties with the WWF(E) beginning to learn how to really utilize this match as a way to build up Wrestlemania.

Royal Rumble 1990

Emanating from the Orlando Arena in Orlando, Fl

In a cruel twist of scripted irony, Ted DiBiase is #1 this year after being #30 last year. His first opponent is Koko B. Ware at #2. Koko gets jumped as soon as he enters. DiBiase makes a mistake by trying to ram Koko’s cranium into the turnbuckle. Koko charges but DiBiase backdrops him to the floor. Now there are only 28 more to go. DiBiase waits as #3 Marty Jannetty makes his way down. Jannetty tries a high flying move that DiBiase dodges and causes Jannetty to be eliminated. Second verse same as the first. Jake Roberts is #4 and these two have issues at this point. DiBiase meets Roberts on the floor and slaps on the Million Dollar Dream. Roberts escapes by ramming DiBiase into the post. Inside, Roberts tries for the DDT, but DiBiase backdrops him. As Roberts hits a kneelift, Macho Man makes his way down at #5. The heels quickly begin to double-team Roberts. With Roberts tied in the ropes, he gets some help in the form of #6 “Rowdy” Roddy Piper. Piper takes care of both heels and then frees Roberts. The faces and the heels team up with Piper and Macho nearly eliminating each other. The Warlord saunters out at #7. He goes right after Piper. Meanwhile, Macho and DiBiase unsuccessfully try to eliminate Roberts. #8 is Bret Hart who again evens the face/heel ratio. Everyone is pairing up but no one is close to elimination. Everybody’s friend, Bad News Brown is #9. Roberts again goes for the DDT on DiBiase, but Macho comes over and clotheslines him to the floor. It’s now Bret/Warlord, Bad News/DiBiase, and Piper/Macho squaring off. The fat quotient just skyrocketed as #10 is Dusty Rhodes and he goes right after Macho Man. Macho charges at Dusty but gets backdropped to the floor. Crowd loved that one.

#11 is Andre who makes his impact felt immediately by eliminating the Warlord. Heenan and Fuji get into a scuffle as a result of that elimination. That was a nice touch. Andre now takes on both Piper and Dusty, while Bad News and DiBiase beat up Bret. The Red Rooster is #12 as Piper is almost eliminated by Bad News. Piper then actually does eliminate Bad News. Angered by this, Bad News pulls Piper out and the two brawl all the way back to the dressing room. Dusty tries to dump DiBiase but Virgil keeps him in. Andre dumps the Rooster as #13 Ax makes his way down. Just to be cruel, the fans start a ‘Weasel’ chant for Heenan. Dusty and Ax get Andre tied up in the ropes and pound on his head. As they free him, Andre nails each of them in the gut. It would have been really cool if he would have ball-tapped them. To help his partner Andre, Haku is #14. He goes after Dusty while Andre sits on Ax. Conveniently, Ax’s partner Smash now comes out at #15. Demolition now pair off against the Colossal Connection. #16 is Akeem and the ring really has some tonnage now. Demolition both hit shouldertackles on Andre and that’s enough to eliminate him. As Demolition now tries to eliminate Haku, the announcers inform us that Bret was eliminated off camera. But just remember, the cameraman didn’t screw Bret. Bret screwed Bret. Superfly Jimmy Snuka is #17 and gets hit by Akeem as soon as he enters. Virgil once again helps DiBiase stave off elimination. Meanwhile, Snuka comes back and knocks Akeem out. Haku and Snuka double headbutt Smash and then beat each other up. Now that’s what a Rumble’s all about. #18 is Dino Bravo to the interest of no one. Everyone seems to be milling around now. Earthquake is #19 and he’s already ripped his unitard before he even hits the ring. Dusty gets tossed by Earthquake within seconds of his arrival. Demolition tries to double-team Earthquake but he casually dumps Ax out of the ring. #20 Jim “the Anvil” Neidhart who goes right after Earthquake and soon everyone joins him to eliminate the huge Canadian. DiBiase, still surviving, gets hit with a double atomic drop by Smash and Neidhart.

Crowd wakes up as the Ultimate Warrior hits the ring at #21. He goes after Dino Bravo and eliminates him soon thereafter. Everyone pairs up again as #22 Rick Martel makes his way down. Haku dumps Smash over but he hangs on only to be knocked off by a Haku kick. Neidhart heaves Martel over but he hangs on and sneaks back in under the bottom rope. #23 is Tito Santana and he begins fighting Martel to no one’s surprise. Those two will probably be fighting at the 2015 Royal Rumble. Honky Tonk Man is #24 and is greeted right away by the Warrior. A bunch of guys brawl on one side and Neidhart gets eliminated in the process. Warrior reverses a DiBiase whip and then clotheslines him to the floor. Nice effort by DiBiase who becomes the first Iron Man of Rumble matches. #25 is Hulk Hogan and the exit sign lights up for a lot of guys. Snuka gone! Haku gone! Santana gone! It’s now Martel paired up with the Warrior and Honky tangling with Hogan. Shawn Michaels comes down at #26 as Hogan tosses Honky out. Warrior goes into hurry up mode and eliminates Shawn and Martel back-to-back. Shawn gets the Bushwhacker award tonight. We’re left with the Ultimate Face-off. Hogan and Warrior stare at each other as the crowd goes nuts. They criss-cross and then they clothesline each other. With both men down, the Barbarian comes out at #27. He has his way with both Warrior and Hogan. Before we get a countdown, Rick Rude enters at #28. Rude hits Warrior with a dropkick as the Barbarian tries to eliminate Hogan. Rude comes over to help the Barbarian, but Warrior makes the save. Soon the Barbarian and Rude try to eliminate the Warrior and Hogan comes over and finishes the job. Oh Hulk, you are a devious one. Warrior comes back in and beats up the heels some more, simply because he’s crazy. Hogan gets some help, as if he needs it, from #29 Hercules. Hogan gives the Barbarian a back rake to show how tough he is. And because he is what he says he is, Mr. Perfect is our #30 entrant.

Heel miscommunication between the Barbarian and Rude allows Hercules to eliminate the Barbarian. That makes our Final Four Hogan, Perfect, Rude and Hercules. The weak link of the bunch, Hercules gets eliminated by a Rude clothesline. Rude accidentally hits Perfect with a forearm and knocks him through the ropes. Hogan whips Rude to the ropes which are pulled down as Perfect hoists himself up. That causes Rude to be eliminated. Perfect comes in and hits Hogan with the PerfectPlex. That causes Hogan to pop up and go to work on Perfect. After Perfect hits the top of the post from a slingshot, Hogan grabs him and tosses him out for the victory.

Bottom Line: A pretty decent Rumble that nicely set up numerous feuds for Wrestlemania (Hogan/Warrior, Jake/DiBiase, Dusty/Macho, Piper/Bad News, and Demolition/Colossal Connection). There were also very few lulls during the course of the match. The only negative was the uncreative finish. Perfect was originally booked to win the match, but you can guess who vetoed that idea. That’s right, HHH. ****

RBR: The Debt

2012-01-15T20:59:00.000-05:00

This got lost in the shuffle when it was released back in August, but it was hard for me to ignore a film that boasts acting greats like Helen Mirren and Tom Wilkinson, along with rising stars like Sam Worthington and Jessica Chastain. The film deals a trio of Mossad agents who are attempting to hunt down a Nazi doctor. In order to do so, the film flashes back and forth between the time of the mission and current day. This can be an effective narrative device, but I didn't like it hear and thought it just made the film more confusing, not engaging. And because we jump back and forth, not enough time is given to Mirren and Wilkenson, who play the older versions of two of the agents. And while I liked some of the action scenes in the film, there was not enough of that in here. Instead, we get a deeper look into these agents personally and I just wasn't captivated by it. In its attempt to look at how these agents handle this mission, the film can't find the right voice to treat this subject (which has its roots in real life) properly. If it was trying to be poignant, it failed to do so. If you want a decent foreign espionage thriller, I'd recommend Hanna over this commendable, but otherwise confusing film. Rating: ***

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1989

2012-01-15T03:08:00.000-05:00

- As we continue on, this is the first Rumble to appear on PPV. We're also up to the tradition 30 participants here.

Royal Rumble 1989

Emanating from The Summit in Houston, TX

Historical moment right from the get-go as Ax is #1 and Smash is #2. It’s a good thing they never split and feuded because their action here is not worth noting. Thankfully Andre is #3 and the Demos turn their attention to him. Jesse says Andre is up by 1 or 2 on him on Battle Royal wins. Ha! More punching and kicking as Mr. Perfect strolls in at #4. Perfect slugs everyone as Andre casually tosses Smash out. Ax sends Perfect CRASHING into the corner. “Rugged” Ronnie Garvin is #5. Andre gets triple teamed but fights back. Perfect oversells like only he can to Andre’s offense. Greg Valentine is #6. Andre continues to be the focus of attack. This angers the Giant as he sends Garvin to the floor. Jake Roberts is #7 to wake up the crowd. Jake who actually has a beef with Andre can’t attack him as Andre beats him to the punch. Jake is getting squashed in there! Cueball Ron Bass is #8 as Andre tosses out Jake. Off to the bars for Roberts. Valentine and Perfect take over on Andre while Ax and Bass square off. Shriek! It’s Shawn Michaels at #9. Perfect perfectly launches Ax out. Perfect and Michaels face off and now I’m interested. Butch is #10. Man what a POP for Butch! Oh wait, never mind, it’s for Jake who is back out with Damian. Jake chases Andre over the top rope and out.

Honky is #11. Everyone is squared off: Butch and Bass, Perfect and Honky, Michaels and Hammer. Fans squeal over the prospects of Honky getting pitched. Tito is #12. He goes straight for Perfect. Butch bites Honky; nothing new there. Bad News is #13. Ring is getting crowded now. Honky finally gets tossed by Tito and Butch. Marty Jannetty is #14. Rockers join forces to eliminate Ron Bass with a double dropkick. Jannetty bashes Perfect’s head in the top, middle, and bottom turnbuckles. Talk about driving home a point. Macho Man is #15 and immediately goes after Bad News. Arn Anderson is #16. Savage eliminates Valentine. Double A and Macho team up (talk about strange bedfellows) and eliminate Shawn Michaels. Anderson goes up top but gets crotched. Have no fear Arn because Tully is #17 to help you out. The Brainbusters soon work over Jannetty. Jannetty, on the brink of elimination, eventually gets shoved out by Blanchard. Hogan is #18 and I think we’re going to see some spring-cleaning. Bye Perfect! Bye Tito! Hogan gets into trouble and Macho doesn’t help. Hmmm… Luke is #19. As he hits the ring, Bad News and The Hulkster eliminate Butch. Koko B. Ware is #20. Anderson goes up top again and gets caught again. Think Arn! Koko gets dumped by Hogan. He’s got the record tonight for shortest appearance. Luke gets tossed by Hogan now too. We’re down to the Busters on Hogan and Bad News fighting Macho Man.

Here comes Warlord at #21. Hogan has now eliminated Tully and Arn. Warlord steps in and goes right back out via a Hogan clothesline. Spoke too soon about Koko, congrats Warlord. Now Hogan runs over and dumps Bad News AND Macho Man. “Uh oh, Savage is hot” so says Ventura. And I would be too. Elizabeth comes out to play peacekeeper. She gets Savage to agree to shake hands and Hulk is reluctant. What should he be reluctant for?!? Hulk then shakes and hugs. AWW! Before the lovefest can continue the buzzer sounds and here comes the Bossman at #22. Man, Bossman was huge back then. It’s all Hogan to start off with. Avalanche slows Hogan down. Akeem waddles down at #23 to even the sides against Hogan. Yes, I said even the sides. Towers eventually get the upper hand and eliminate Hulk. Whaaaa? Brutus Beefcake is #24. As the Towers double team Beefcake, Hogan pulls the top rope down to eliminate the Bossman. Our Hero! Hulk and Bossman fight to the locker room. Meanwhile, Akeem works over Beefcake in the corner. You’ll notice Brutus looks to the cameraman to see if he’s filming and then shouts in pain as if he was a nervous young girl filming her first porn video. The Red Rooster is #25 and struts and pecks his way down to ringside. Akeem gets double-teamed by the Barber and Taylor. The Barbarian is #26. Crowd is beginning to realize there isn’t much left in the way of star power. Big John Studd is #27. Studd shoves the Rooster down so he can have Akeem all to himself. Hercules is #28. Nothing of note happening. Rick Martel is #29 and Jesse wonders how he got such a high number. I have my suspicions as well. Million Dollar Man is #30. Man, I don’t know why Ted was so upset at the drawing earlier in the evening. I’d be thrilled with #30. But hey, that’s me. Virgil stays at ringside. Just to spectate I assume.

Dibiase makes an immediate impact by tossing the Rooster out. Sleeper by Brutus on Hercules is costly as Dibiase and The Barbarian dump them both. Barbarian charges but misses and Martel eliminates him. Down to the Final Four, consisting of Dibiase, Martel, Studd, and Akeem. Eh, could be worse. Martel doesn’t learn from the Barbarian though as a charge gets him tossed by Akeem. Dibiase then begins directing traffic, ordering an Akeem attack on Studd. Studd says no more and uses Dibiase as a shield. He then dumps Akeem leaving Dibiase all alone. Studd toys with him for a few minutes before eventually vanquishing him. Virgil then tries his luck and gets tossed too. Crowd politely cheers.

Bottom Line: Fairly entertaining Rumble. They did a nice job of continuing the slow boil that led to the MegaPowers exploding. Booking Studd as the winner came as a shock. Obviously, this was before they used the Rumble as a method for determining the #1 contender. *** ½

RBR: Cowboys & Aliens

2012-01-15T02:49:00.000-05:00

I had high hopes for this one and can you blame me? I mean this was a genre-burring film starring James Bond and Indiana Jones being directed by the guy that did Iron Man. And yet with all that star power, I struggled to keep my interest as I watched this film. It attempts to mix sci-fi with westerns and ends up doing neither genre any justice. Given that this is not a conventional storyline, there is understandably not a lot of previous work that they can base this one on. With that said, there are still too many aspects of this story that were confusing or implausible. For starters, none of these characters seem all that freaked out by the fact that there are alien creatures attacking there town. It's one thing for a character set in modern day to be nonplussed by an alien invasion because they would have at least seen alien movies or read stories about creatures from another planet. But would anyone who was living during the time period that this film is set have heard of an alien before? They acted the same as if it had been a posse of outlaws who had just rolled into town looking to cause problems. There's also the confusing nature of why exactly the aliens are here. We get some vague explanation, but not enough to satisfy me. We also have some poor character development. Harrison Ford's Colonel Dollarhyde goes from crusty hardass to big softie WAY too quickly in the film. Frankly, it would have been more interesting had he remained cranky throughout the film. You also have Olivia Wilde playing a woman with a mysterious background that is also never fully explained. Meanwhile, Daniel Craig looks badass during the action scenes, but since his character has amnesia he's sort of a blank slate when it comes to personality, which isn't very exciting. I give everyone involved here a lot of credit for trying something different and inventive, I just wish the execution of the idea had been stronger. This is a big disappointment and probably not worth a recommendation regardless of if you're a western, sci-fi, Harrison Ford, or Daniel Craig fan. When cowboys and aliens meet, two genres enter and nobody comes out entertained. Rating: ** 1/2

Royal Rumble Rewind: 1988

2012-01-15T02:00:00.000-05:00

This years marks the 25th Royal Rumble, my favorite match in pro wrestling. In honor of this distinction over the next two weeks, I'll be looking back at the previous years' matches leading up to this year's event on January 29th. So that each of these posts are not too long, I'll only be recapping/reviewing the Rumble match itself from each year. Most of these reviews will be the same as the ones I wrote for the website Online Onslaught. If you enjoy these, feel free to head over there and read my reviews of all the old pay-per-views. So let's get this started with the innaugural edition...

1988 Royal Rumble

Emanating from the Copps Coliseum in Hamilton, Ontario Canada

About the only difference between this match and the one we know today is that there were only twenty participants in this one. #1 is Bret Hart and #2 is Tito Santana; a fine pair to kick things off. Bret starts off by beating down Santana in the corner. Santana comes back and delivers some rights of his own. As Bret goes to eliminate Santana, Butch Reed comes out at #3. He naturally goes after Santana. Get it, naturally? Santana retaliates with a double noggin knocker on the heels. Things get worse for Santana as #4 is Jim “the Anvil” Neidhart. They triple team Santana, but do not eliminate him before Jake “the Snake” Roberts comes in at #5. He comes up behind Reed and eliminates him. Jake attacks the Hart Foundation and soon Santana helps him. Harley Race is #6, as the Harts go back on offense. Everybody dukes it out with nothing special happening until Jumping Jim Brunzell arrives at #7. We’ve paired off now with Brunzell battling Race, Santana hammering Bret, and Jake and Neidhart going at it. #8 is Sam Houston and he goes after Neidhart. The Harts team up and toss Santana out of the ring. Dangerous Danny Davis is the #9 entrant and he immediately brawls with Houston. Jake has Race teetering on the ropes. The ring is starting to fill up as Boris Zhukov enters at #10.

#11 is…is…well, both Don Muraco and Nikoli Volkoff come down to the ring. The referees let Muraco in and hold back Nikoli. As he argues with the refs, his partner, Zhukov is eliminated. It’s time for #12 and now they let Nikoli enter. They could have played that better and had it where Nikoli just missed out on saving his partner. Meanwhile, Muraco throws Race out of the ring. As Race argues with the refs, Hacksaw Jim Duggan comes out at #13. Those two exchange shots before Race eventually runs away. Jake teases about his fourth or fifth DDT of the match, but still doesn’t hit it. Outlaw Ron Bass is #14 and the ring is still pretty crowded. Nikoli picks up Brunzell and dumps him to the floor. And what poor timing as B. Brian Blair now enters at #15. It’s your typical run of the mill brawling from everyone as Hillbilly Jim comes out at #16. He makes an immediate impact by eliminating Neidhart. #17 is Dino Bravo who earlier tonight ahem ‘broke’ the bench press world record. Bass gets Houston up on his shoulders and then tosses him to the floor. Charging out at #18 is the Ultimate Warrior. Soon after, Muraco grabs Bret and throws him out. Good showing by Bret going about 25 mins. in this initial Rumble. #19 is OMG! I’m not surprised; it’s just the One Man Gang. He grabs Blair and quickly disposes of him. Now the Gang eliminates Jake. The field is complete as Junkyard Dog comes out at #20.

Duggan ducks a clothesline and flips Nikoli out of the ring. The Gang continues to dominate as he now gets rid of Hillbilly. Duggan charges and clotheslines Davis out of the ring, much to the delight of the crowd. Bravo and the Gang team up to toss out the Warrior. They’re dropping like flies now. As JYD attacks the Gang, Bass comes from behind and throws him out. That’s followed by Muraco clotheslining him out of the ring. That means the inaugural Final Four are: One Man Gang, Don Muraco, Hacksaw Jim Duggan and Dino Bravo. Muraco holds his own against the heels until he dropkicks Frenchy Martin. That allows Bravo to attack him. He then holds Muraco and allows the Gang to clothesline him to the floor. Duggan’s divide and conquer against the Gang and Bravo only works briefly. The heels try the same move they just did on Muraco, but this time Duggan moves and the Gang accidentally eliminates Bravo. The Gang charges at Duggan, but Duggan drops down and the Gang falls out and to the floor. Hacksaw is going to Wrestlemania!! Oh wait, nevermind. Actually, Duggan did have a chance of winning the title because he was part of the WWF title tournament that was held at Wrestlemania that year. Who knew they inadvertently had the “winner gets a title shot as Wrestlemania” stipulation in since the beginning.

Bottom Line: Given all the other Rumble matches since then, this one is far from one of the best. Still, it was inventive enough from the beginning that it was able to endure and become a classic tradition. I would have preferred more eliminations throughout the match, but they were still ironing out the kinks here. Having Duggan win wouldn’t have been my first suggestion, but since a win here really meant nothing, I won’t let it bother me too much. *** (out of a possible five)

The Comeback Kid deleted scenes

2012-01-14T16:27:00.000-05:00

Paulitical opponent

2012-01-10T00:06:00.000-05:00

From nymag.com

For months now, fans of NBC's Parks and Recreation have been wondering just who might play Leslie Knope's opponent in her race for city council. There'd been speculation that Katherine Hahn (Free Agent) might be tackling the role, but it turned out she's set to play an adviser to one of Leslie's rivals. With the election plotline heating up on the show — according to NBC's listings, the next three scheduled episodes, including this Thursday's, all have campaign themes — Vulture set out to discover the identity of Knope's new nemesis. We believe we have done so, and it appears Leslie will be doing political battle against ...

Paul Rudd! The star of films such as I Love You, Man and Role Models will appear in at least one upcoming episode of Parks and Recreation, Vulture has learned. Nobody from the show or NBC would confirm the casting, but our industry sources say Rudd shot his scenes late last year. That likely means his appearance will come sometime within the next month. While Rudd did a vocal guest-stint on The Simpsons last season and has guested in the past on the late, lamented Veronica Mars and Reno 911!, the Parks and Rec stint marks his return to Thursday nights on NBC after spending several years as a recurring player on Friends. Rudd also has several movies coming out this year, including Wanderlust (opposite Jennifer Aniston), Judd Apatow's This Is 40, and The Perks of Being a Wallflower.

Nobody's Holmes

2012-01-05T23:34:00.000-05:00

When I did my 2011 movie preview, two of the films that I ranked high on the list were The Hangover Part II and Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows. Both merited their spot because of how much I enjoyed each of their original films. However, in my preview of both of these sequels, I questioned how good they could be given that each of them were coming out only two years after their predecessor. Earlier this year my suspicions were proven correct as most people agreed that the second Hangover was nothing but a pale imitation of the first. Sadly, the same turns out to be true for Sherlock Holmes

2009's Sherlock Holmes was one of the most pleasant surprises I had had at the movies in recent years. What could have been awful turned out to be an extremely engaging and entertaining film. I loved the way director Guy Ritchie had woven the more violent aspects of the film into Holmes' cerebral nature. And of course, the casting of Robert Downey Jr. as the titular gumshoe and Jude Law as his faithful sidekick, Watson was inspired. They had even managed to nicely sow the seeds for this sequel with the introduction of Holmes' arch-rival, Professor Moriarty.

Fast-forward to this sequel and hardly any of what made the first film so appealing can be found. The biggest absence is a central mystery. Instead of having Sherlock track down the clues of Moriarty's latest elaborate crime, they turn the professor (played by Jared Harris) into a Bond-esque villain, who's out to start a world war. The elements of Moriarty's plan that are left to mystery are not very engaging, nor do they truly test Holmes' intelligence. Late in the film, the two rivals play a literal game of chess to represent the supposed metaphorical one that they've been playing the entire movie, but I think dodgeball would have been a more apt analogy. The film spends way too much time on gunfights and/or people trying to escape a hail of gunfire. While the action that was incorporated into the first film fit, here it feels excessive and unnecessary.

A lack of mystery is not the only thing missing from the film. This sequel was also in need of more snappy dialogue. While Downey and Law are still able to exchange a number of clever and witty barbs at each other, there is no one else here for them to play off of. A lot of the fun from the first film came from Holmes' interactions with both Inspector Lestrade and Irene Adler (Rachel McAdams). The globe-spanning plot of this film forced Holmes out of London, thus Lestrade was limited to a mere cameo. Meanwhile Irene briefly shows up at the beginning of the film only to have her appearance be ended rather abruptly. Both of their presence were sorely missed throughout most of the film.

It doesn't help that the female substitute for McAdams' Adler is Noomi Rapace, a gypsy woman who has connections to Moriarty's plot. Rapace is a charisma vacuum in this film and weighs down every scene she's in with the film's leads. Why the writers felt the need to have her stay with the detectives throughout the movie is baffling to me. She added nothing to the audience's enjoyment of the film and she added nothing to help Holmes and Watson solve the case. I can only hope that if a third film is made (and it will be) that her character is nowhere to be seen in it.

Had this been a generic action movie set in this time period, I probably would have enjoyed it a lot more. The film keeps the story moving along and there's plenty in it to keep your attention. But because of the Sherlock Holmes name and the quality of the first film, there were certain expectations that I had for this sequel that simply were not met. This just reeked of a cash grab instead of taking the time to create a good story. Downey and Law's talent can only take things so far. And while they did their best to make this enjoyable, there were just too many other variables that weighed this film down. I can only hope that more time and effort goes into making the third film. I'm not ready to give up on this franchise, but this was one of the biggest disappointments I had this year at the movies, and sadly there were a lot of them this year. How they managed to botch this film so badly is a mystery that not even Holmes himself could solve. Grade: C+

Local locos

2012-01-02T15:20:00.002-05:00

While actual news continues to be slow during the holidays, here's a look back at some classic local news bloopers that made the rounds on the internet in the past year.

2012 Movie Preview (#6 - 1)

2011-12-31T01:58:00.000-05:00

6. The Amazing Spider-Man (July 3rd)

Plot: Columbia Pictures and Marvel Studios announced they are moving forward with a film based on a script by James Vanderbilt that focuses on a teenager grappling with both contemporary human problems and amazing super-human crises.

Personal opinion: This is in a similar situation as The Bourne Legacy in that a popular franchise is getting a complete makeover. Both could be disasterous or they could be a breath of fresh air that these films needed. While the decision to reboot this franchise is questionable, I certainly can't argue with their casting decisions. After The Social Network, Andrew Garfield is a star in the making and you know how much I love Emma Stone, so I'm totally for her being chosen as Gwen Stacy, even if it meant her eschewing her red hair for a blonde mane. As long as they don't completely ruin the character with the script, this should keep Spidey crawling along just fine.

5. Dog Fight (August 10th)

Plot: Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakis will play rival politicians in a small congressional district in South Carolina.

Personal opinion: All they had to say was Will Ferrell and Zach Galifianakis together and I was immediately sold. The fact that they are putting them in a plot that sounds rife for comedic gold only sweetens the pot. Given that 2012 is an election year will probably help this film gain even more viewers. The only thing that concerns me is that the film is being directed by Jay Roach, who has a spotty track record. He's had some great films like Austin Powers and Meet the Parents, but he's also had some duds like the sequels to those films. I would have prefered if Ferrell's longtime collaborator, Adam McKay had directed it, but I digress. The comedic strength of these two leads should have no problem carrying the film to prosperity.

4. The Gangster Squad (October 19)

Plot: Los Angeles, 1949. Ruthless, Brooklyn-born mob king Mickey Cohen (Sean Penn) runs the show in this town, reaping the ill-gotten gains from the drugs, the guns, the prostitutes and--if he has his way--every wire bet placed west of Chicago. And he does it all with the protection of not only his own paid goons, but also the police and the politicians who are under his control. It's enough to intimidate even the bravest, street-hardened cop...except, perhaps, for the small, secret crew of LAPD outsiders led by Sgt. John O'Mara (Josh Brolin) and Jerry Wooters (Ryan Gosling), who come together to try to tear Cohen's world apart. "The Gangster Squad" is a colorful retelling of events surrounding the LAPD's efforts to take back their nascent city from one of the most dangerous mafia bosses of all time.

Personal opinion: As you can see by reading the plot description that this has some acting heavyweights in the cast. I always enjoy the gangster genre and feel its underutilized in Hollywood today. It's interesting to note that this action drama is being directed by Reuben Fleischer, who directed Zombieland This is uncharted waters for him, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. I would be remiss if I didn't mention that Emma Stone is also part of the cast. That instantly improves things in my book. Ultimately as long as this one avoids being as dull as Public Enemies, it should be a winner.

3. The Avengers (May 4th)

Plot: Continuing the epic big-screen adventures started in "Iron Man," "The Incredible Hulk," "Iron Man 2," "Thor" and "Captain America: The First Avenger," "Marvel's The Avengers" is the superhero team up of a lifetime. When an unexpected enemy emerges that threatens global safety and security, Nick Fury, Director of the international peacekeeping agency known as SHIELD, finds himself in need of a team to pull the world back from the brink of disaster. Spanning the globe, a daring recruitment effort begins.

Personal opinion: Our patience finally gets paid off here. After sitting through several single character comic book films, the band finally comes together as the supergroup our world needs. At this point, we know all the central players, so let's hope this film doesn't dwell too much on establishing them and just gets right to the action. Joss Whedon was a bit of a surprising choice to direct such a monumental film, but I think he's got the geek cred to do this group justice on the big screen.

2. Skyfall (November 9th)

Plot: In "Skyfall," Bond's loyalty to M is tested as her past comes back to haunt her. As MI6 comes under attack, 007 must track down and destroy the threat, no matter how personal the cost.

Personal opinion: I went through great deliberation over what to put at #1 and this one came very close to getting that spot. It's no secret that I am a huge Bond geek and the wait for this film has been excruciating given the delays thanks to MGM's financial problems. But the wait is over and I'm eager to see Daniel Craig back in action. Ultimately, I put this at #2 just because it has a few more uncertainties surrounding this one. First of all Quantum of Solace was a bit disappointing so it's not a given that this one will be great. There's also the Sam Mendes factor. While he's an accomplished director, he has never really done an action film before, so we'll see how he handles that side of this movie. These are minor quibbles though as this should be an excellent return for everyone's favorite superspy.

1. The Dark Knight Rises (July 20th)

Plot: Warner Bros. Pictures' and Legendary Pictures' "The Dark Knight Rises" is the epic conclusion to filmmaker Christopher Nolan's Batman trilogy, Leading an all-star international cast, Oscar winner Christian Bale ("The Fighter") again plays the dual role of Bruce Wayne/Batman. The film also stars Anne Hathaway, as Selina Kyle; Tom Hardy, as Bane; Oscar winner Marion Cotillard ("La Vie en Rose"), as Miranda Tate; and Joseph Gordon-Levitt, as John Blake. Returning to the main cast, Oscar winner Michael Caine ("The Cider House Rules") plays Alfred; Gary Oldman is Commissioner Gordon; and Oscar winner Morgan Freeman ("Million Dollar Baby") reprises the role of Lucius Fox.

Personal opinion: Do I really need to say anything here? After the HUGE success of The Dark Knight, is there any one in the world not anticipating this film? I am equally anxious for this and the new Bond film, but the fact that everyone is back for this film and then some makes it the surer bet. It's a little sad knowing that this movie will be the last Batman that Christian Bale and Christopher Nolan do, but that only builds the intrigue as we wonder how they will choose to end this. The trailer that was released last week already left me breathless, so now we just have to anxiously count down the days until next summer to see the full thing.So there you have it. The best of the best. I hope it's clear to the rest of you as it is to me that next year's slate looks a hell of a lot better than the offerings we got this year. Whether it's actually true or not remains to be seen. Thankfully we don't have long to wait. Let's bring on 2012! Happy New Year everyone and remember to keep visiting this blog throughout the year to read more updates and reviews for all of these films and more.

Missing the cut

2011-12-31T00:50:00.000-05:00

No doubt some of you will question why some notable films are not on my 2012 movie preview. All I can say is that those films just were not as exciting as the thirty I listed. But in the interest of fairness, I've decided to showcase a few of the most prolific ones that already have trailers out. Enjoy!

2012 Movie Preview (#12 - 7)

2011-12-30T01:10:00.000-05:00

12. The Dictator (May 11th)

Plot: The film tells the heroic story of a dictator who risked his life to ensure that democracy would never come to the country he so lovingly oppressed. It is inspired by the best selling novel "Zabibah and The King" by Saddam Hussein.

Personal opinion: So which Sasha Baron Cohen will we get here? The one who became a cultural phenomenom with Borat or the one who turned off audiences by crossing the line from funny to offensive with Bruno? Based on the trailer I posted here recently, it seems like his latest film has a mixture of both in it. However, the final scene involving him running in a race had me in stiches and gave me the confidence that this one can be a real winner.

11. The Bourne Legacy (August 3rd)

Plot: The Universal release has taken the title from the Eric Van Lustbader book based on the series created by Robert Ludlum, but they will not be using the story. "This is not a reboot or a recast or a prequel. No one's replacing Matt Damon. There will be a whole new hero, a whole new chapter...this is a stand-alone project," said Gilroy. "The easiest way to think of it is an expansion or a reveal," Gilroy added. "Jason Bourne will not be in this film, but he's very much alive. What happened in the first three films is the trigger for what happens. I'm building a legend and an environment and a wider conspiracy... the world we're making enhances and advances and invites Jason Bourne's return [down the road]."

Personal opinion: The Bourne franchise has been one of my favorite of the past ten years, so I'm somewhat conflicted over this latest entry. It's a shame they felt like they needed to continue it despite neither Matt Damon nor director Paul Greengrass returning for this one. Their absence will no doubt be huge. Having said that, there are several of the supporting actors who are returning to help maintain continuity. As for the replacements, Jeremy Renner is quickly establishing himself as a mainstream action star and Tony Gilroy, who will direct this one, was a writer on the previous Bourne films and has also directed Michael Clayton proving that he has the directing chops and familiarity with the material needed to fill Greengrass' shoes. This will be no easy feat, but if they can pull it off, it'll be one of the most pleasant surprises of 2012.

10. This is Forty (Decemeber 21st)

Plot: The film will feature an original story with characters created by Rudd and Mann in "Knocked Up."

Personal opinion: Here's another possible case of redemption. After disappointing virtually everybody with the unfunny Funny People, Judd Apatow is finally getting back behind the camera with this sequel/spin-off of Knocked Up focusing specifically on Paul Rudd and Leslie Mann's married couple. Apatow struck gold when exploring the life of a 40-year old before, so I look forward to seeing what he can come up with this time. Hopefully by returning to some familiar territory with some friendly faces he'll get the comedic juices flowing again.

9. Django Unchained (December 25th)

Plot: In Quentin Tarantino's new spaghetti Western, the title character Django is a freed slave, who under the tutelage of a German bounty hunter (Christoph Waltz) becomes a badass bounty hunter himself. After assisting Waltz on taking down some bad guys for profit, he is in turn assisted by Waltz in tracking down his slave wife and liberating her from an evil plantation owner. The film deals with racism, while it's 100 percent pure popcorn and revenge flick, it takes on the evil slave owning south.

Personal opinion: I'll admit I took awhile to get on the Quentin Tarantino bandwagon. However, after seeing Inglorious Basterds I became a convert. By the looks of the cast he's rounded up for this film, it seems many other people are believers as well. You have guys like Leonardo Dicaprio and Jaime Foxx working on this film along with Tarantino alums like Samuel L. Jackson and Christophe Waltz. With Basterds Tarantino conquered the war film, so now I'm really curious to see what he has up his sleeve for the spaghetti western genre. This could be another major player come awards season.

8. American Reunion (April 6th)

Plot:In the comedy "American Reunion," all the "American Pie" characters we met a little more than a decade ago are returning to East Great Falls for their high-school reunion. In one long-overdue weekend, they will discover what has changed, who hasn't and that time and distance can't break the bonds of friendship.

Personal opinion: So may look at this and feel that this franchise has worn out its welcome, especially with the addition of those pitiful direct-to-DVD, quasi-sequels, but I've always had an affinity for these films. I guess because the characters' timeline closely mirrors my own I see these films as a time capsule of my own experiences. The fact that they were able to get everyone from the original cast back for this one is exciting and the trailer released earlier this year has me believing that this slice of pie has not become completely stale yet.

7. Looper (September 28th)

Plot: Joseph Gordon-Levitt plays a contract killer who works for the mob of the future, and who kills victims that are then sent back in time 30 years so there's no trace of the crime, but one day, he recognizes one of his targets (Bruce Willis) as a future version of himself.

Personal opinion: I always appreciate when a sci-fi film can develop an idea that's unique and creative and on paper this one sounds like it will fit the bill. This one is being directed Rian Johnson, who impressed a lot of people with his first two films, Brick and The Brothers Bloom. I like both Gordon-Levitt and Willis, so it should be fun to see them share the screen in this one. The only concern I have is the release date. There have often been a lot of promising sci-fi films released in the fall that have turned out to be duds. Based on some early buzz I've heard about this one though, it sounds like it should be able to avoid that problem.

Living in a dream

2011-12-30T00:05:00.000-05:00

It appears that this year's crop of midseason replacements on television is an unusually strong crop. Here's just one of the programs that shows promise - a drama called Awake, which will be premiering on NBC in the next couple of months. I've posted a trailer below to give you a taste of what you can expect.

Mission statement

2011-12-29T15:17:00.003-05:00

In the original Mission: Impossible film Tom Cruise's Ethan Hunt had to break into a room with floor sensors undetected. That meant nothing could touch the ground, not even a bead of sweat. If audiences today were watching the fourth entry in this series, Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol, on such a floor it would not take long for them to be detected. This hard-boiled, pulse-pounding thriller may be the most action packed one yet.

There are several well crafted scenes in this film that tickle your fancy while playing off your biggest fears in the same moment. Most notably involves Cruise trying to climb the outside of the Burj Khalifa, the world's tallest building in Dubai. What is so remarkable about that scene and so many others in this film is the way they hide how exactly they filmed them. Too often in today's action films scenes that heavily rely on CGI or other visual effects come off as phony looking and take you out of the moment. Here there's no sense of that. Hell, you hardly even can detect if they are using stuntmen even. As a result, you become more invested in having these characters succeed in their efforts to once again save the world.

The realistic nature of these scenes is even more surprising when you learn that they were directed by someone who's background had previously been exclusively in animation. Director Brad Bird, who had previously helmed The Incredibles and Ratatouille does a remarkable job of taking the flexible reality of cartoons and making it come to life in this live action thriller. It's a tremendous efforts for someone's first live action film and I expect more good things to come from him down the line.

With that said, it's one thing to film the action, it's another thing to actually do it, which is exactly what Tom Cruise does again. The guy gets a lot of flack for his personal life, but there's no doubt that he still knows how to bring it when you put him on screen. Cruise, who reportedly did most of his own stunts for the film, is an adrenaline junkie who excels at making the impossible look possible. He thankfully did not have to carry the load all on his own, though, as he was surrounded here with a solid group of partners. Paula Patton, who plays Jane, does an excellent job of seamlessly blending physical action with sex appeal. She more than holds her own in a couple of fight scenes to validate her presence on the team and shows that she wasn't just cast solely because she's easy on the eyes. Simon Pegg is also back as techie, Benji. He offers some good comic relief that is played perfectly so as to never detract from the seriousness of the stroy. Lastly, Jeremy Renner, plays an analyst who unwittingly gets roped into the mission. At worst, his presence merely adds some gravitas to the cast, but he also could be positioning himself as the heir apparent once Cruise is done with this franchise.

The only real strike against the film is the lackluster villain and his plan to conquer the world. Hendriks (played by Michael Nyqvist) does not have enough screen time to establish himself as a character and his decision to start a nuclear war feels played out. This has often been an issue with these M:I films, however. Their appeal is more in the elaborate nature of stopping the villain, regardless of who it is or what they're trying to do.

In a year where so many films, particularly action films have fallen flat or failed to live up to expectations, it's refreshing to see this one raise the bar and offer viewers something truly special. While I did not have the luxury of seeing this movie in IMAX, everything I've read suggests that is the way to go. If I was left breathless watching these scenes on a regular screen, I can only imagine how heart-stopping they must be in that format. If you're looking to avoid the heavy dramas or prestige pictures that often dominate the cineplexes at this time of the year, this is the movie for you. Cruise and company have proven that it's not 'impossible' to still feel fresh four movies into a franchise. Grade: A-

2012 Movie Preview (#18 - 13)

2011-12-29T01:06:00.000-05:00

18. Neighborhood Watch (July 27th)

Plot: "Neighborhood Watch" is a sci-fi comedy about a suburban "neighborhood watch" group that serves as a front for dads to get some male-bonding time away from their families. The group finds itself in over its head when it uncovers a plot to destroy the world.

Personal opinion: Five years ago, a film featuring Ben Stiller and Vince Vaughn would have likely been much higher on my list. But since that time, each of them have made some questionable choices in terms of their film roles, which make me somewhat cautious about getting excited about this one. That they are together in this movie helps, along with the fact that Jonah Hill and Will Forte are also part of the cast. I'm a bit suspicious of the sci-fi aspect of this film, but until I see a trailer your guess is as good as mine as to what to expect here.

17. ParaNorman (August 17th)

Plot: In "ParaNorman," a small town comes under siege by zombies. Who can it call? Only misunderstood local boy Norman (voiced by Kodi Smit-McPhee), who is able to speak with the dead. In addition to the zombies, he'll have to take on ghosts, witches and, worst of all, moronic grown-ups, to save his town from a centuries-old curse. But this young ghoul whisperer may find his paranormal activities pushed to their otherworldly limits.

Personal opinion: For some reason, I got hooked on this film after its first trailer came out last month. It seems as if the people behind this film are trying to outdo Tim Burton in the whole 'creepy, but not too creepy stop-motion animated' genre. I think the idea behind this story is really solid and the world they've created looks very imaginative. The only thing I question is why they are choosing to release this in August instead of October. Having a spooky film like this released in the summer may cause it to get lost in the shuffle.

16. The Five Year Engagement (April 27th)

Plot: The director and writer/star of "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" reteam for the irreverent comedy "The Five-Year Engagement." Beginning where most romantic comedies end, the new film from director Nicholas Stoller, producer Judd Apatow ("Knocked Up," "The 40-Year-Old Virgin") and Rodney Rothman (Get Him to the Greek) looks at what happens when an engaged couple, Jason Segel and Emily Blunt, keeps getting tripped up on the long walk down the aisle. The film was written by Segel and Stoller.

Personal opinion: We've already seen the trailer for this one as well and all signs indicate good stuff here. They had already set themselves up well by having Segal reteam with his Forgetting Sarah Marshall director and pairing him with the sexy and charming Emily Blunt on screen. Segal seems to pick his romantic comedies well having been successful with Marshall and I Love You Man and his streak appears as if it will continue on in 2012.

15. Lincoln (December)

Plot: Based on the best-selling book "Team of Rivals," by Pulitzer Prize-winning historian Doris Kearns Goodwin. The screenplay has been written by the Pulitzer Prize winner, Tony Award winner, and Academy Award nominated writer Tony Kushner. The film will focus on the political collision of Lincoln and the powerful men of his cabinet on the road to abolition and the end of the Civil War.

Personal opinion: Half-way through and now we're really getting to the good stuff. If you've already seen the picture that came online a few weeks ago, you'll know what inspired casting it was to have Daniel Day-Lewis play Lincoln. Spielberg may be getting a lot of press right now for the two films he has in theaters, but this one is infinitely more appealing to me than those two combined. This one should be a history buff's dream come true.

14. Prometheus (June 8th)

Plot: Visionary filmmaker Ridley Scott returns to the genre he helped define, creating an original science fiction epic set in the most dangerous corners of the universe. The film takes a team of scientists and explorers on a thrilling journey that will test their physical and mental limits and strand them on a distant world, where they will discover the answers to our most profound questions and to life's ultimate mystery.

Personal opinion: If you visited the blog earlier this week, you no doubt saw that I had posted a trailer for this new Ridley Scott film. As I alluded to in that post, the story is being kept tightly under wraps, but there are some indications that this may be a prequel to 1979's Alien. Having recently gained an appreciation for both the 1979 film and its sequel, I am really curious about this movie. Now even if it ends up having nothing to do with Alien, this still has a very good chance of being good given Scott's proclivity of delivering solid action films.

13. Argo (September 14th)

Plot: Based on true events, "Argo" chronicles the life-or-death covert operation to rescue six Americans, which unfolded behind the scenes of the Iran hostage crisis--the truth of which was unknown by the public for decades. On November 4, 1979, as the Iranian revolution reaches its boiling point, militants storm the U.S. embassy in Tehran, taking 52 Americans hostage. But, in the midst of the chaos, six Americans manage to slip away and find refuge in the home of the Canadian ambassador. Knowing it is only a matter of time before the six are found out and likely killed, a CIA "exfiltration" specialist named Tony Mendez (Affleck) comes up with a risky plan to get them safely out of the country. A plan so incredible, it could only happen in the movies.

Personal opinion: DirectingGone Baby Gone Ben Affleck raised some eyebrows. With The Town, he proved his first film was no fluke. Now he's behind the camera again with one of those so crazy it must be true stories. The more I read about this and think about what Affleck has done thus far as a director, the more excited I get for this film. I hate to rush to conclusions, but this could easily be a strong contender for some awards this time next year.

Out with the old...

2011-12-28T23:59:00.000-05:00

Last year, I posted a video that encapsulated all of the films of 2010. Since we're once again getting to the end of the year, I thought I would do the same thing. I can't say I have the same fondness for this year's crop of films, but it's nice to see them again in a nice little package. Let the reminiscing begin.

2012 Movie Preview (#24 - 19)

2011-12-28T00:55:00.000-05:00

24. Bernie (March)

Plot: Jack Black plays Bernie, the beloved mortician in a small Texas town. MacLaine is the town's richest, meanest widow, and even she adores him. No one will say a bad word about Bernie - even after he commits a very nasty crime.

Personal opinion: Not a whole lot to go on yet with this movie, but from the sparse details this sounds like it could be a unique comedy. I think what intrigues me the most is that this will mark the first time that Jack Black has teamed up with director Richard Linklater since they worked on School of Rock. It's been a while since Black has had a film that he's been funny in and that's been successful, perhaps this is the one that finally returns him to comedic prominence.

23. Total Recall (August 3rd)

Plot: The new story involves the nation states of Euromerica and New Shanghai, with Douglas Quaid (Colin Farrell) a factory worker in the latter who begins to believe he is a spy, although he doesn�t know for which side. Vilos Cohaagen (Bryan Cranston) the leader of Euromerica who, under the cover of protecting his people, is secretly readying an invasion of New Shanghai.

Personal opinion: I just saw the original 1990 film for the first time earlier this year, so I can't say I'm a longtime fan. However, I enjoyed the film more than I expected and I thought the film posed a lot of interesting ideas. Now that technology and visual effects have dramatically improved, I'm really curious if they can improve on the story. Colin Farrell isn't the best actor, but I have to believe he'll be an upgrade over Ah-nuld.

22. Butter (March 16th)

Plot: In small-town Iowa, an adopted girl discovers her talent for butter carving and finds herself pitted against an ambitious local woman in their town's annual contest.

Personal opinion: I'm always in the mood for quirky comedies and this one seems like it will fit the bill. With an odd subject matter and a whole host of funny people comprising the cast, including Jennifer Garner, Hugh Jackman, Olivia Wilde, Ty Burrell, Rob Corddry, and Kristen Schaal this seems like a movie I could really enjoy. I doubt it will do huge business at the box office, but I'm not really concerned about that. If it used the butter carving competition wisely and not as a gimmick, this could be really good.

21. The Raven (March 9th)

Plot: When a mother and daughter are found brutally murdered in 19th century Baltimore, Detective Emmett Fields (Luke Evans) makes a startling discovery: the crime resembles a fictional murder described in gory detail in the local newspaper, part of a collection of stories penned by struggling writer and social pariah Edgar Allan Poe. But even as Poe is questioned by police, another grisly murder occurs, also inspired by a popular Poe story. Realizing a serial killer is on the loose using Poe's writings as the backdrop for his bloody rampage, Fields enlists the author's help in stopping the attacks. But when it appears someone close to Poe may become the murderer's next victim, the stakes become even higher and the inventor of the detective story calls on his own powers of deduction to try to solve the case before it's too late.

Personal opinion: Based on the trailer that was released already for this film, it seems as if they're trying to model this somewhat after the recent Sherlock Holmes movie. If they're successful at emulating that model and can create a decent mystery this has a chance at being a sleeper hit next spring. I like John Cusack and appreciate how he frequently takes unconventional roles and this one seems to be no different. I look forward to watching his interpretation of Poe and hope this movie is able to be more than campy schlock.

20. Brave (June 22nd)

Plot: Merida is a skilled archer and impetuous daughter of King Fergus (voice of Billy Connolly) and Queen Elinor (voice of Emma Thompson). Determined to carve her own path in life, Merida defies an age-old custom sacred to the uproarious lords of the land: massive Lord MacGuffin (voice of Kevin McKidd), surly Lord Macintosh (voice of Craig Ferguson) and cantankerous Lord Dingwall (voice of Robbie Coltrane). Merida's actions inadvertently unleash chaos and fury in the kingdom, and when she turns to an eccentric old Wise Woman (voice of Julie Walters) for help, she is granted an ill-fated wish. The ensuing peril forces Merida to discover the meaning of true bravery in order to undo a beastly curse before it's too late.

Personal opinion: This year, Pixar proved it was fallable with Cars 2 being a misfire. They'll quickly get a chance to reclaim their glory with this film, though. On the plus side, they are doing an original story and the trailer shows that this should be another visual wonder. This film doesn't rank higher on my list however for two primary reasons: first, while I have no problem with the film having a female protagonist it just doesn't appeal to me personally and secondly, the Scottish environment and characters doesn't feel fresh after Dreamworks' How To Train Your Dragon. Pixar still has the best track record out there for a movie studio so if anyone can make this work, it's them.

19. Haywire (January 20th)

Plot: In "Haywire," an electrifying tale of espionage and betrayal, a female covert ops specialist (Carano), who works in the deadly world of international operatives, strikes back after discovering she's been double-crossed by someone close to her in the agency. The film is produced by Gregory Jacobs ("Ocean's" Trilogy) and written by Lem Dobbs ("The Limey").

Personal opinion: A film about a female spy who kicks a lot of ass isn't exactly original (see Salt, Columbiana). But when I saw the intense trailer for this, I began to think that this film may have some things going for it that will hopefully allow it to stand out amongst those others. First of all, this movie is being directed by Steven Soderbergh and he doesn't strike me as someone who does a film simply for a paycheck. Another plus is the cast. You've got guys like Michael Douglas, Antonio Banderas, Bill Paxton, Ewan McGregor, and Michael Fassbender in this to improve the film's credentials. The wild card though is Gina Carano. Having an MMA fighter with no real acting experience as the lead could be a problem. As long as they spend more time with her beating people up and not talking though, they should be fine.

Ridley's believe it or not

2011-12-27T23:13:00.000-05:00

Here's the trailer for Ridley Scott's new film Prometheus, which may or may not be a prequel to Alien. I'll have more to say about this film later in the week in my 2012, but for now enjoy the teaser instead.

2012 Movie Preview (#30 - 25)

2011-12-27T01:39:00.001-05:00

Hard to believe we're at the end of another year. While there were plenty of things to celebrate in 2011, I feel that it was a rather lackluster year at the cineplex. Granted I haven't seen a number of potentially good movies yet, but overall I just wasn't as enamored with most of Hollywood's offerings this past year. But hope springs eternal, so as we turn the calendar over to 2012 we look ahead and I think things are looking much brighter. In the next few days, I'll be previewing the 30 films set to come out next year that I'm most looking forward to. Keep checking in throughout this week and see if you agree that 2012 is shaping up to be a great year at the movies.

30. Wreck-It Ralph (November 2nd)

Plot: Wreck-It Ralph (voice of John C. Reilly) longs to be as beloved as his game's perfect Good Guy, Fix-It Felix (voice of Jack McBrayer). Problem is, nobody loves a Bad Guy. But they do love heroes... so when a modern, first-person shooter game arrives featuring tough-as-nails Sergeant Calhoun (voice of Jane Lynch), Ralph sees it as his ticket to heroism and happiness. He sneaks into the game with a simple plan-win a medal-but soon wrecks everything, and accidently unleashes a deadly enemy that threatens every game in the arcade. Ralph's only hope? Vanellope von Schweetz (voice of Sarah Silverman), a young troublemaking "glitch" from a candy-coated cart racing game who might just be the one to teach Ralph what it means to be a Good Guy. But will he realize he is good enough to become a hero before it's "Game Over" for the entire arcade?

Personal opinion: As will be the theme for most of these early movies on this list, it's a little too early to tell how this one will turn out. It has a terrific voice cast and it's being produced by Disney (although this is not a Pixar animated film) so it has the credentials, but I'm a little unsure of the film's story. It feels like well-tred territory. We recently had both Despicable Me and Megamind do the whole 'bad guy gone good' plot and there also seems to be some similarities to this film and the 90s cartoon Reboot. If the film can feel fresh, this should be very successful.

29. Man on a Ledge (January 27th)

Plot: An ex-cop and now wanted fugitive (Sam Worthington) stands on the ledge of a high-rise building while a hard-living New York Police Department hostage negotiator (Elizabeth Banks) tries to talk him down. The longer they are on the ledge, the more she realizes that he might have an ulterior objective.

Personal opinion: If you didn't see it originally, I had posted the trailer for this film a few weeks ago. I doubt this movie will set the world on fire, but given that January is usually a dumping ground for lousy movies, this looks like it has a chance at being half-way decent. There are a lot of solid character actors here who will no doubt raise the film's quality. And based on the trailer, there looks like there could be several twists and turns in the story. As long as they don't get too cute with the storytelling this could be worthy of making a trip out to the theater during the dead of winter.

28. Gravity (November 21st)

Plot: Dr. Ryan Stone (Sandra Bullock) is a brilliant medical engineer on her first shuttle mission, with veteran astronaut Matt Kowalsky (George Clooney) in command of his last flight before retiring. But on a seemingly routine spacewalk, disaster strikes. The shuttle is destroyed, leaving Stone and Kowalsky completely alone--tethered to nothing but each other and spiraling out into the blackness. The deafening silence tells them they have lost any link to Earth...and any chance for rescue. As fear turns to panic, every gulp of air eats away at what little oxygen is left. But the only way home may be to go further out into the terrifying expanse of space.

Personal opinion: On the surface, this sounds like it could be the plot to a hokey B-movie. However, with George Clooney and Sandra Bullock leading the cast this will be anything but. The film is also being directed by visionary director Alfonso Cuaron (who directed Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, which was in my opinion the most stylish film in the franchise). Given that this film will be done in 3D, this could be one of the few films that actually uses the technology effectively. I'm not sure this is the most conventional Thanksgiving film, but I'm still anxious to check it out.

27. Ted (July 13th)

Plot: "Family Guy" creator Seth MacFarlane brings his boundary-pushing brand of humor to the big screen for the first time as writer, director and voice star of "Ted." In the live action/CG-animated comedy, he tells the story of John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg), a grown man who must deal with the cherished teddy bear who came to life as the result of a childhood wish... and has refused to leave his side ever since.

Personal opinion: As anyone who has ever watched Family Guy knows, Seth McFarland can be a very funny guy. The big question though is whether that humor can translate onto the big screen. Considering that the quality of most of his animated shows has waned in the past year or so, I'm hoping it's because he's putting his best efforts into this project. McFarland has certainly improved his chances by bringing along several of his talented voice actors like Mila Kunis and Patrick Warburton to be a part of the cast. I've never been big on the whole live action/CG-animated hybrid genre, so that's a strike against the film. For this film to work, it's going to have to be something more than just a raunchier version of Alvin and the Chipmunks.

26. Wanderlust (February 24th)

Plot: Paul Rudd and Jennifer Aniston star in "Wanderlust," a raucous comedy from director David Wain ("Role Models") and producer Judd Apatow ("Knocked Up") about a couple who leaves the pressures of the big city and joins a freewheeling community where the only rule is to be yourself.

Personal opinion: This fills up the requiste role of movie that was featured on last year's preview and then got bumped. I don't feel the need to say too much more about this movie now. David Wain (Wet Hot American Summer, Role Models) has proven that he can make some very provocative, yet funny films. He's got his usual cast of actors back with him along with Jennifer Aniston, which sounds like a winning combination to me. With all that said, however, it'll probably be a tough sell getting people to come out and watch a movie about a nudist colony.

25. Chronicle (February 3rd)

Plot: Three high school students make an incredible discovery, leading to them developing uncanny powers beyond their understanding. As they learn to control their abilities, and use them to their advantage, their lives start to spin out of control, and their darker sides begin to take over.

Personal opinion: As I pointed out when I posted the trailer for this film, most people are probably tired of superheroes after this past year. But based on what I've seen I really think this is a creative approach to the genre. Taking a realistic approach combined with the documentary style of filmmaking really appeals to me. The key to this film will be in its execution. Will this unique idea be able to cause the genre to soar to new heights or will a failure to follow through cause it to crash and burn? Only time will tell.

From the Batcave archives...

2011-12-26T23:37:00.000-05:00

While most of us are focusing on the upcoming Batman film (to be previewed at some point this week in my 2012 list), here's some rare and unused footage from The Dark Knight. While this was posted on YouTube over a year ago, it's new to me and hopefully new to you as well. Enjoy!

RBR: Larry Crowne

2011-12-26T01:14:00.002-05:00

After seeing the charming trailer last summer for Larry Crowne I eagerly anticipated seeing the film. Being a college professor who frequently teaches public speaking, I wanted to see this film about a middle-aged man (Tom Hanks) who enrolls in a public speaking course after being laid off from his job. Now that I have, I'm resigned to the fact that most of the critics who panned this film were correct. This is not an actively bad film, it's just one that has no significance or substance to it. On the surface, it seems like a film fitting of our current society and yet it never really deals with the economic hardships that so many real people are facing. Despite having no job and no money, Crowne banters with his neighbor (Cedric the Entertainer), bonds with an ecclectic bunch of students who ride around on their Vespa scooters, and flirts with his speech teacher (Julia Roberts). Hanks' likeable personality and cheery disposition just seem out of place for this character and this film. It's hard to get mad at someone like Hanks (who also directed and co-wrote the film), but you can't help but be frustrated that the characters and the story seem so naively ignorant of reality. I did enjoy the speech class scenes, however, and was able to relate a lot to the interactions between teacher and student, so at least there was that. Given the happy nature of the film, there are likely plenty of people who will find it pleasant enough to make it worthy of a rental. If you do give it a viewing, however, just don't expect to gain any sort of poignancy or perspective by watching it. This is pure Hollywood fluff. Rating: ** 1/2

Holy **** Batman!

2011-12-20T00:32:00.000-05:00

The first full trailer for The Dark Knight Rises has hit the internet and I'm in geek overload at the moment. If you haven't seen it yet, check it out below.

RBR: Kung Fu Panda 2

2011-12-20T00:25:00.000-05:00

The first Kung Fu Panda film was a pleasant surprise back in 2008 and proved that Dreamworks was capable of making an animated film on par with those offered by Pixar. In their second go-round, Po (voiced once again by Jack Black) and company deliver a solidly entertaining effort, but one that fails to match the quality of the first. Plot-wise, I really liked the story they went with here. It centers on Po's quest to find inner peace. To do so, he'll have to discover the truth about his actual parents who are connected to the film's primary villain, a peacock named Shen (nicely voiced by Gary Oldman). I actually wished the film had spent more time with this plot and character development. Instead, we get one too many action scenes meant to showcase the 3D effects. Each of the kung fu fighting scenes are well choreographed, but a little goes a long way with them. I was also disappointed that Po's master, Shifu (Dustin Hoffman) did not have a larger presence in this film. His Yoda-like character provides a nice anchor to the film without being overly cliched. Despite the excess of action, the film finishes strong with an emotional tone that hits the right notes. While not as good as the first, this continues to be Dreamworks' strongest animated franchise and I would certainly welcome another film (something that is strongly hinted at in the final scene of this one). Rating: *** 1/2

Forging a Bond?

2011-12-19T11:19:00.000-05:00

From comingsoon.net

He's already starred in Casino Royale and Quantum of Solace and is currently filming Skyfall, but "James Bond" films producer Michael G. Wilson says he would like Daniel Craig to star in five more 007 movies.

Speaking to People.co.uk, Wilson says he hopes Craig will become the longest serving James Bond actor, passing up Roger Moore's seven appearances.

"Daniel's been a terrific Bond, a superb actor and a terrific man. The fans love him and I don't think there's a better actor to play the part... It's certainly something we'll be discussing with him once we finish shooting 'Skyfall.'"

He added that "Filming has gone very well so far and I'd love Daniel to surpass Roger's record and do eight pictures. Daniel's been an absolute pleasure to be around because he takes the role so seriously. There's really no one more passionate about making these films work than him he's a filmmaker's dream.

"A lot of people have said Daniel's been their favorite Bond since Sean Connery and I can't argue with them. He's doing a great job."

About Skyfall, Wilson said that "director Sam Mendes and Daniel are taking it back to a 60s feel, more Sean. I think that's what the fans wanted. There's a magical Goldfinger feel, surrounding it all. It's all very exciting. I can't wait for people to see the movie because I think we're making a very special Bond."

Skyfall is scheduled for a November 9, 2012 release.

Moammar Ga-daffy

2011-12-14T23:08:00.000-05:00

Here's your first look at Sasha Baron Cohen's (Borat) new comedy, The Dictator. As with more of his moves, this seems controversial, but also hit and miss with regard to the comedy. With that said, the last few seconds of this trailer completely sold me.

RBR: The Help

2011-12-14T22:58:00.000-05:00

This is a movie I would normally pass over, but since it is generating some Oscar buzz and I can't resist anything that has Emma Stone in it, I decided to give it a watch. The Help takes a look at the lives of African American maids in the deep south during the 1960s. Emma Stone plays Skeeter, an enlightened young woman who wants to chronicle the plight of these women. The film has some terrific acting from Stone as well Viola Davis and Octavia Spencer, both of whom are likely going to receive some recognition this awards season. The cinematography of the film is very impressive as well giving it an authentic feel of like in 1960's Mississippi. The film's weakness, however is the narrative structure. Based on a popular novel by the same name, the story focuses on too many characters and as a result, you're not really sure who's story this really is. Stone, Davis and Spencer each go through character arcs that feel like they are the primary one, yet also feel underdeveloped. Meanwhile, there are several other subplots jammed in to the film that could have easily been excised in order to devote more time to the central story. There's also the issue with this being a very santized version of what real women went through. They do the bare minimum to get the point across of the deplorable treatment these women received. Realism can be a double-edged sword, however. A more accurate depiction is appreciate by some, but this sugar-coated version enables the film to be more mainstream. I liked this film more than I thought, but I would not go as far as to say its deserving of a best picture nomination. If the subject matter interests you or if you're a fan of any of the actors here, I'd say this is worthy of a rental. Rating: ****

A early Christmas present for our ears

2011-12-13T16:01:00.003-05:00

From the LA Times...

A new rule from the Federal Communications Commission should finally end the practice of viewers reaching for the remote control to turn down the volume every time there's a commercial break.

"The FCC today took a major step toward eliminating one of the most persistent problems of the television age -– loud commercials," the agency said in a statement.

Responding to years of complaints that the volume on commericals is louder than that of regular programming, the FCC on Tuesday passed the Commercial Advertisement Loudness Mitigation Act (CALM). The act requires commercials and entertainment and news programming to be kept at the same volume. The rules also require that the volume for promotional spots be equal to the shows around it.

Multichannel Video Program Distributors such as Time Warner Cable and Comcast Corp. and broadcasters will be responsible for making sure commerical volume is not excessive. The rule goes into effect next December.

Now can the FCC do something about the quality of commercials?

Citizen Knope deleted scenes

2011-12-09T21:40:00.001-05:00

March on Washington

2011-12-08T15:40:00.001-05:00

Finishing up the second part of the double feature I saw last weekend, we now come to The Ides of March, a political drama that has Oscar aspirations about a man with presidential aspirations. In this case that man is George Clooney, who also directed and co-wrote this film. The film, based on the play Farragut North, examines the dilemmas faced by everyone involved in trying to be, or help someone to be the next leader of the free world.

While Clooney is the candidate running for president, the film spends more time with his staff as they run his campaign. At the forefront of that is Stephen Meyers (played by Ryan Gosling), he's a hotshot assistant who claims to have already worked on more campaigns than anyone ten years his senior. That experience doesn't seem to help him much as he quickly gets caught up in the game of dirty politics. He takes a meeting with the chief of staff of the guy Clooney is running against (played by Paul Giamatti). When Clooney's chief of staff (played by Phillip Seymour Hoffman) finds out about the meeting, he's none too pleased.

When you have a cast that features four talented individuals like this film does, you expect to have scene after scene of scenary chewing taking place and yet most of the dialogue between these characters falls a bit flat. I was expecting these scenes to be more explosive where you really felt the emotion behind their words. Perhaps I've gotten too spoiled by Aaron Sorkin dialogue and expected too much here, but I just didn't find these talky scenes to be as gripping as I expected them too. This is not to say they are bad by any means. I was just suprised I didn't love them more.

A lot of their discussions and strategizing are a result of the actions of a young staffer on Clooney's campaign played by Evan Rachel Wood. She takes an interest in Gosling's character, which causes a number of problems. Without spoiling too much about what she does, I will say that I didn't buy into this subplot. Her actions and motivations don't seem realistic and they drag the film down. When it's focused on her, it strays from being a political potboiled into an area of tawdry melodrama.

What this film does do right though is give us a fair, albeit frustrating depiction of the nature of politics. You see as you watch these characters operate that anyone who enters the political game is unable to come out of it unscathed. Everyone has to get a little dirty, it's just a matter of whether or not you embrace it or not. Those who think their ideals can rise above the mudslinging are only fooling themselves. Some moviegoes may be frustrated with that theme since it prevents them from having anybody that they can root for or rally behind in this film.

Though I've pointed out some flaws in this film, it is by no means a bad film. These flaws only get pointed out because the expectations for this film were so high in the first place. In that way, The Ides of March may be very similar to real life presidential candidates. While they make a good first impression, the more you peel back the layers the more disappointment you find. That should in no way suggest that you should ignore this movie like so many people ignore potential candidates. Though this may not win the equivalent of the Oval Office come Academy Award season, it still has a lot to say that should be heard. Grade: B

Future Engagement

2011-12-07T18:01:00.001-05:00

In a few weeks, I'll be doing my big preview of the films coming out in 2012 that I'm most looking forward to. I would imagine Five Year Engagement, starring Jason Segal and Emily Blunt will be finding its way onto my list. You can read more about it in my preview, but until then enjoy the first trailer for the film.

RBR: The Change-Up

2011-12-07T17:46:00.001-05:00

If you watched Freaky Friday and felt it needed more poop and sex jokes, then The Change Up is for you. This latest entry in the body swapping genre pairs Jason Bateman, as the over-worked dad and Ryan Reynolds as the carefree, crass bachelor. Credit goes out to both guys for being able to pull off a realistic switcheroo while avoiding doing simple imitations of the other. Each actor does a nice job of truly embodying the other. Aside from the tired premise, the film's major problem comes from ineffectively developing a proper arc for each of these characters. The whole reason to do such a movie is to have each person reevaluate their own life by enjoying the novelty of being someone else. However, the life that they initially establish for Ryan Reynolds character is so vulgar and irresponsible, that there's no way anyone, let alone the uptight character that Jason Bateman plays, would actually want that life. Ultimately Bateman's character just needs a vacation, not someone else's life. This proves to be true as his character doesn't really differ once he's back in his own body while Reynolds ends up getting to see the error of his ways and becomes a better person (who ends up getting Olivia Wilde in the end - not a bad deal at all). The body swapping formula works, which is why it keeps getting reused. Here, the emotion associated with their dilemma is felt and comes off genuine. I just wished they hadn't felt the need to be so crass in their humor. The jokes made by, about, or around children in this film are particularly troubling and were not needed. I can't say that I completely hated this film, but it's tough for me to fully recommend it either because of its problems. Guys will likely be turned off by the sentimentality while women won't care for the gross-out humor. If this film had been able to swap out some of its elements, perhaps it too could have been better off for it. Rating: ** 1/2

Myth-ed it by that much

2011-12-07T17:38:00.001-05:00

From EW.com...

A stunt for the TV show MythBusters sent an errant cannonball through a California family’s house and into a parked minivan a few hundred feet away.

Producers for the Discovery Channel show fired the cannonball Tuesday at the Alameda County Sheriff’s Department bomb range behind the Santa Rita Jail when it misfired.

Sheriff’s spokesman J.D. Nelson told the Contra Costa Times that no one was injured and the home’s residents didn’t even wake up until the dust was settled — literally on top of them.

Nelson, who is also a consultant for the show, said producers have used the cannon that they built at the range more than 50 times without incident.

The cannonball was supposed to go through a few water-filled barrels and a concrete wall. Instead, it passed over the barrels, through the wall, and then took a “very unfortunate bounce that sent the ball skyward,” Nelson said.

About 700 feet away, it bounced in front of the Dublin home, then tore through the front door and out a wall on the back of the house. The projectile then bounced at least once more and crossed the road before smashing the window and dashboard of the minivan, where it came to rest.

“We had some tremendous bad luck and some tremendous good luck” in that no one was hurt, Nelson said.

Jasbir Gill, who owns the minivan, said he and his children had just gotten home.

“It’s scary,” Gill said. “I was in the van five minutes before this happened.”

Nelson said he did not know the exact size, speed or weight of the cannonball.

The show, according to the Discovery Channel website, mixes “scientific method with gleeful curiosity and plain old-fashioned ingenuity to create [its] own signature style of explosive experimentation.”

Keys to success

2011-12-07T00:37:00.001-05:00

You know me, I'm not a huge music guy, so you know it's a big deal when I bother to mention a group/song that I appreciate it. In this case, it's the Ohio-based group, The Black Keys, who gave a rocking performance on Saturday Night Live this past weekend. I caught on to them with the previous album and have thus far enjoyed everything I've heard on their new album, El Camino, which was released this week. Not only do they know how to rock, but they also create some enjoyable music videos as well. Below you can watch both the one for Lonely Boy, which is the first single off their new album and the one for Howling For You, which was their big hit from their previous album.

RBR: Friends With Benfits

2011-12-05T21:25:00.001-05:00

It's hard not to compare this to No Strings Attached considering they share the same set up and both feature an actress from Black Swan, but I'll do my best to base my review solely on its own merits. One of the things that this film does in setting up its 'sex with no consequences' premise is to mock and tear down the conventions and cliches found in most romantic comedies. I have no problem with that and in fact some of their snark towards the genre produces some good laughs (take that Katherine Heigl!). The problem comes with the fact that while mocking them, the film itself fails to rise above those cliches. This is disappointing considering director Will Gluck had been successful at escaping the cliches of the high school comedy genre with his previous film, Easy A. Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis have a light, breezy chemistry and you can buy them being together whether it's as sleepin' buddies or in a relationship. There's no reason other than it's a movie to have them go through some sort of conflict or strife. It feels forces and causes the audience to grow impatient waiting for the inevitable reconciliation. While that flaw is disappointing, it does not completely ruin the film. As I said, the two leads work well together and unlike so many romantic comedies, this film features an appealing supporting cast thanks in large part to terrific actors like Richard Jenkins and Patricia Clarkson. In comparison to most films in this genre, this one is watchable and entertaining. Just don't expect it to transcend the genre like it thinks it does. Rating: ***

The Trial of Leslie Knope deleted scenes

2011-12-04T21:43:00.001-05:00

Beane counter

2011-12-04T17:34:00.001-05:00

After a long drought (for me) of going to the theater, I finally made it there for a cool deal being offered by Regal Cinemas - a 2 for 1 double feature of Moneyball and The Ides of March (review forthcoming). Both films were ones I was highly anticipating, but for various reasons had not yet seen.

We'll begin with the baseball drama, Moneyball, starring Brad Pitt as Oakland A's GM, Billy Beane. The film focuses on the 2002 baseball season where Beane attempted to put a winning team on the field despite having one of the lowest payroll's in the league and losing star players left and right to teams (like the Yankees) who could afford to pay these players higher salaries. Beane devises a new way of scouting talent after meeting Peter Brand (played by Jonah Hill), a young, Ivy league grad, who was working with the Cleveland Indians organization; A fact I did not know. (Once again, the Indians find a way of giving up talent both on the field and in the front office).

Together, Beane and Brand begin to adopt the philosophy of Bill James, a statistician who had developed a formula to evaluate players' worth from a different way. One of the biggest factors that they focus on in the film is a player's on base percentage. In general, you'll score more runs if your team consists of a lot of players who find a way of getting on base (whether by a hit or walk). While this discussion and usage of statistics to create a winning team could have been dense and dull, it's not. Director Bennett Miller, along with Aaron Sorkin (The Social Network) and Steve Zallian, who co-wrote the film do an excellent job of getting the Moneyball philosophy across in a simple manner that could be understood by everyone. Personally, being a guy who likes statistics, I actually wish they would have discussed the number crunching even more, but I'm perfectly fine with the way its depicted.

The film's best scenes come from the intereactions between Beane and those who disagree with this new approach. Most of the A's scouts are incedulous towards his way of thinking since it spit in the face of the way they had evaluated talent. This method made them virtually obsolete. Also against Beane's philosophy is A's manager, Art Howe. He's played by Phillip Seymour Hoffman, in a terrific performance. While not the most postive portrayal, Hoffman does a nice job of coming off as grizzled and bitter. The scenes he has with Beane are engaging and really help in making you root for Beane.

While it takes some time, Beane's system begins to work much to the surprise of everyone else. One of the best things about this movie is the usage of actual media coverage throughout the season. We hear comments from sportscasters, radio hosts, and fans analyzing both the team's early struggles and their improvement as the season progressed. You really get a sense of how little everyone knows about sports when you're not actually inside the organization. It's catharic to listen to so-called analysts be completely off base when it comes to identifying why a team succeeds or fails.

Watching the film, you learn how Beane's desire to have this philosophy work is so personal. Through flashbacks the film shows how Beane himself was supposed to be a 'can't-miss' prospect who never panned out in the big leagues. You see how he's driven to prove the flaw in scouts' analysis and wants to avoid making personal connections with talent because of the possible pain it can bring. If the film has a weakness, and its minor one, it's that the film has a few too many introspection shots involving Pitt staring off in the distance contemplating. I get what they were going for, but I also feel its a bit overdone.

Overall, this is one of the best baseball movies out there and it hardly features any game play. At its core, its an underdog story that anyone can get behind. If you know anything about baseball and the recent history of Oakland, you'll also know that while Beane's story has not personally had the perfect ending, the imprint his Moneyball approach has had on the game is evident throughout the league. Like last year's The Social Network, I love the theme of individuals thinking outside the box and watching the rest of the world struggle to comprehend the ramifications of such an idea. Like a good utility player, Moneyball is versatile in providing something entertaining for a variety of audiences. Its ability to do so makes this film a home run. Grade: A

Getting a slice of some sweet pie

2011-12-02T15:06:00.001-05:00

Once again Funny or Die delivers...this time with a fake 1980s sexual harassment video featuring Tim Meadows as Herman Cain

Herman Cain's 1986 Sexual Harassment Training from Tim Meadows