Never Say Never Again (1983)

Quick note: I had no intention of including this film in the Bond countdown. Since it wasn't released by MGM, it's considered to be the red-headed stepchild in the franchise. However, since they pushed Quantum of Solace back a week, I had a week to fill in my countdown. It should also be noted that this was my first time watching this movie, so my review may not be as detailed as most.



Plot: When two atomic warheads are hijacked by the evil SPECTRE organization, British superagent James Bond (Sean Connery, in his final performance as 007) jumps into a frantic race to save the world from nuclear terrorists. With Largo (Klaus Maria Brandauer), Blofeld (Max von Sydow) and Fatima (Barbara Carrera) bent on destroying the world, Bond is never far from death in director Irvin Kershner's Golden Globe-nominated action flick.

Firsts: It's an unofficial Bond, so pretty much everything is a first.

Gadgets: Pen loaded with explosives, wristwatch that shoots lasers, and a loaded mini-bike.

Girls Bond slept with: Nurse at Shrublands, Fatima Blush, woman in Bahamas, and Domino Petachi

Elaborate murder attempt that Bond escapes: suited with a device that attracts sharks, left to be killed by vultures

Personal review: Given it's unofficial status, I really wanted to hate this film but it's not completely terrible. It helps that it is essentially a remake of Thunderball, which had a decent story. What truly hampers the film is the limitation McClory had with what he could make. He could use character names, but missing are the opening credit sequences, the music, and most of the other trademark actors.

I think one of the film's biggest problems is how set in the 80s this film feels. I don't know what it is about that decade, but most films from that era do so many things to root them in that time period, unlike films from the 70s or 60s. And I'm not talking about production values. I'm talking about scenes like Bond and Largo playing a video game. They are at a casino, why do they need to be playing video games? At least make that scene relevant by having Bond use his newly gained video game knowledge to help him stop the nukes from exploding at the end of the movie.

As for the cast this time, Klaus Maria Brandauer is actually decent as Largo. He plays him more realistic instead of overly dramatic, which works within the context of this film. Kim Basinger unfortunately is pretty bland as Domino. And I was sorely disappointed to see Max Von Sydow have so few scenes as Blofeld. From what I read, a lot of his scenes were cut. They must have been pretty terrible for them not to be included. And Barbara Carrera is your stereotypical 80s empowered female villain aka uber-bitch.

Of course, Connery is back again in this one and he really shouldn't have been. Not matter how good of shape he was in, he did not belong here. It's painful having to watch so many action scene shot so far away or involving something on Bond's head to help mask how much the stunt doubles did in this film. I understand Connery needed the money, but all he did was tarnish his legacy with this film.

If this was a generic action film, I think most people would enjoy it. But because there's so much attached to the Bond franchise, this was doomed to fail. I really wish I could have been older in '83 to see the public response as this and Octopussy came out within mere months of each other. I'm glad people chose the true Bond film, even if that one is pretty terrible; which begs the question, why the people at EON didn't try harder to make a better film. Or maybe they did, yikes. Anyways, there's no real reason to check this one out, beyond the curiosity factor. Do yourself a favor and just watch Thunderball instead. 6/10