RBR: Total Recall

I only saw the 1990 version of Total Recall a few years ago and while I really liked the movie, I also recognized that it is one of the few good films that could actually benefit from a makeover. Though cutting edge at the time, the film's visual effects look particularly cheesy today and there are certainly better thespians out there than Ah-nuld. So when a remake was announced, I had great anticipation to see what they could do. Having now seen this latest adaptation of the Philip K. Dick short story, I couldn't be more disappointed. In essence, director Len Wiseman seems to have totally missed what made the original film so appealing when making this new film. Visually the film is most dark with the exception of an overabundance of lens flares that serve no purpose. Gone are several of the interesting characters, who are replaced here by either robots or wooden actors. The whole aspect of Mars has been eliminated so don't expect to see any aliens or mutants. And as for the mind-bending twists of the original, the ones that still remain in this remake don't offer anything new or thought-provoking. What we're left with is a lot of chase and fight scenes. There's nothing wrong with those, but they didn't need to drag the good name of Total Recall down in order to make them. Most of the performances from Colin Farrell, Kate Beckinsale, and Jessica Biel are totally forgettable. And I don't know what Bryan Cranston was thinking joining this film as Cohaagen. I see no redeemable qualities of this film so please just do yourself a favor and stick with the original. For those of us who have seen it, we can only hope a place like Recall exists in the future to help scrub our mind of this memory. Rating: * 1/2